Have your children ever had an extremely disruptive child in elementary class?

[Anonymous]

Currently there is a very disruptive child in my child's class. My kid is very amused by this other kid's behavior and has, himself, become disruptive when he breaks into fits of laughter. He tries to hide his amusement, now, after getting into trouble for giggling. He just finds this other kid to be very funny. I don,t know of any plans to remove the kid.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Currently there is a very disruptive child in my child's class. My kid is very amused by this other kid's behavior and has, himself, become disruptive when he breaks into fits of laughter. He tries to hide his amusement, now, after getting into trouble for giggling. He just finds this other kid to be very funny. I don,t know of any plans to remove the kid.

Mine too. Not the disruptor but enjoyed the disruption and that was almost as bad. He's now in Middle school and has learned to be a zombie drone in school. bummer. Good learner and doing well, but what about all those who don't.

[Anonymous]

19:43. This is true at times to a point, but having one child with moderate difficulties I can only imagine how much additional work it would be to parent a child with special needs. My 2nd child is a piece of cake with no issues and I actually parent him less. I was completely shocked when I went to a back to school playdate to hear the coordinator saying exactly what you said to other parents. It certainly isn't compassionate and made me question her parenting more than theirs. Can't there be a middle ground where kids get help without all the criticism, but parents don't have to worry about a main stream classroom having life threatening issues or a child with excessive poor behavior taking up all the teacher's time?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:23:16 I feel for you, but did you get the school to pay for a full time aide or did you contribute as well? You say you fought for the aide which implies that you had to beg for money to be directed toward your child and away from others. If the full time aide isn't any better than you would be and your child isn't getting much out of mainstreaming, why take the money for the aide?

I think it is unrealistic for most families to be able to afford aides in the classroom. DC should really consider having medicaid pay for classroom aides based on medical necessity like autism for example. Some other states do it this way and disabled students from all income levels are eligible for medicaid when said child is diagnosed with a disabling condition. Their medicaid policy would pay for the aide thus relieving the schools and families from bearing the cost of an aide.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:23:16 I feel for you, but did you get the school to pay for a full time aide or did you contribute as well? You say you fought for the aide which implies that you had to beg for money to be directed toward your child and away from others. If the full time aide isn't any better than you would be and your child isn't getting much out of mainstreaming, why take the money for the aide?

I think it is unrealistic for most families to be able to afford aides in the classroom. DC should really consider having medicaid pay for classroom aides based on medical necessity like autism for example. Some other states do it this way and disabled students from all income levels are eligible for medicaid when said child is diagnosed with a disabling condition. Their medicaid policy would pay for the aide thus relieving the schools and families from bearing the cost of an aide.

Thank you! This is the parent of the child in question. The diagnosis is, in fact, autism. When meltdowns occur due to stress or sensory overload, it is disruptive to the other students, especially if the child cannot be removed (by an aide). Academically this child is at the top of the class and the majority of the time is fine. The aide makes it possible for the child to participate in a neuro-typical environment instead of having to go to a private setting. Frankly, I would love a private setting, but at $50K+/year, it's just not a possibility for our family (total HHI below $100K). The other option is homeschooling which we would be willing to do, but then that doesn't adequately provide the social skills learning that our child so badly needs.

I don't fault the parents of ESL kids or kids with intellectual abilities or other problems or just kids who don't grasp academic concepts as quickly as my child. The resources are there, some kids need more, some kids need less. Also, it's important to note that an aide, especially in a case like ours, can provide valuable back-up to the teacher and assistance to the rest of the class. Our aide is active on the playground, not just with our child. He is able to help out other kids or just be in the room if the teacher needs to use the restroom or whatever. It is actually his job to try to focus as little as possible on our child as long as the fundamental needs are being met. But when our child needs a sensory break or can't go to an assembly (too loud) or lunch (too smelly and loud) or recess (too chaotic), the aide is there to provide coverage. If our child needs a quiet space to do work, the aide can facilitate that. This way, the majority of problems are avoided before they happen.

I wish I had money to help contribute. Unfortunately, as many parents of autistic children know, the mere fact of having an autistic child often pushes the mother off the professional track. This is what has happened to me, with a graduate degree, because I need to be available to parent my child even during school hours. Between all the therapies and doctors appointments and days off because the aide is out and days off due to extreme anxiety, it is impossible to hold down a professional job. I am fortunate that I have been able to find something flexible that keeps a paycheck coming in, but naturally it is for less than 1/2 the money.

It is a very difficult situation to be in. I would much rather my child quietly failed academically than excelled academically but caused occasional disruption to the other students. I wonder if there would be attention to my child were the academic success not to be on target? I think in this day of NCLB and testing, there would be a tremendous amount of attention to a student who was behind academically. So there are a lot of ways to take away from the class as a whole and a lot of ways to give.

[Anonymous]

My children each had multiple disruptive children in their elementary classes each year. These were children who had behavior issues and some with IEP's for learning disabilities. Looking back, it was actually helpful, because they learned how to focus and learn despite all of the things going on around them. By the time they got to middle school, the classes were full of chaos and disruption, but they were able to ignore it all and stay on the honor roll.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My children each had multiple disruptive children in their elementary classes each year. These were children who had behavior issues and some with IEP's for learning disabilities. Looking back, it was actually helpful, because they learned how to focus and learn despite all of the things going on around them. By the time they got to middle school, the classes were full of chaos and disruption, but they were able to ignore it all and stay on the honor roll.

I love this way of handling challenges - finding the positives that outweigh the negatives. Good for your children and good for you!

[Anonymous]

We all do that. The point is when does it go overboard to where it affects the entire class. If teachers are too burnt out from dealing with these children and no one except the special ed kid is learning much than I say things are out of whack in those classrooms.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We all do that. The point is when does it go overboard to where it affects the entire class. If teachers are too burnt out from dealing with these children and no one except the special ed kid is learning much than I say things are out of whack in those classrooms.

Why would you assume the disruptive kid was Special Ed?

[Anonymous]

If they aren't special ed, the get expelled or moved to another class at the very least.

[Anonymous]

My child had 4 disruptive children in her Kindergarten class at a local private school that we paid $29,000 for her to attend. The way the school dealt with it (not at all) is by sending the disruptive children into the hallway to play with blocks and other toys.

Combine that with a 5th child who was just plain mean to my daughter and her year turned out pretty crappy.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My child had 4 disruptive children in her Kindergarten class at a local private school that we paid $29,000 for her to attend. The way the school dealt with it (not at all) is by sending the disruptive children into the hallway to play with blocks and other toys.

Combine that with a 5th child who was just plain mean to my daughter and her year turned out pretty crappy.

And to think, you paid good money for that crappy experience.

[Anonymous]

There were disruptive kids in our son's 2nd grade that prompted a move to private this year. A couple of the kids were bad enough to get full time aides..the rest just muddled along the best they could. One of the (evil) twins in the grade pushed a boy down a flight of stairs on their way to lunch. The boy who was pushed face planted onto the head of the kid in front and it knocked out his tooth. Still the twin was back in the class the next day "being watched carefully".

There were way too many kids disrupting the class for my liking.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My child had 4 disruptive children in her Kindergarten class at a local private school that we paid $29,000 for her to attend. The way the school dealt with it (not at all) is by sending the disruptive children into the hallway to play with blocks and other toys.

Combine that with a 5th child who was just plain mean to my daughter and her year turned out pretty crappy.

And to think, you paid good money for that crappy experience.

Exactly. I didn't write this before, but we ended up leaving for public. We are all so much happier. It's the best thing we ever did. There are a ton of special needs students in both my children's classes. The difference is that they are well staffed with 6 SPED teachers in the building (about 350 children in the school), many SPED assistants, a counselor, ESOL teachers, etc.

[Anonymous]

I just left my 1st grade teaching position because of these problems. This is an injustice to the violent children as well as the rest of the class. I have been teaching for 4 years and I have seen this each and every year. Children with special psychological needs are ignored while the rest of the class is disrupted each and every day while students lose valuable instruction. I witnessed this in my classroom as well as several other classrooms for the entire year. It may take as long as an entire school year for disruptive or violent students to be removed from the classroom. Students cannot make up for that lost time! Don't think that I have no sympathy for the students with behavior problems. They are not learning in this environment either. They are simply being tolerated to be passed on to another school or teacher the next year. They need special counseling and behavior training. Regular education teachers are not trained psychologists and are not equipped to provide the support that these students need. I could not stay knowing that my students would not be able to learn and the children with the psychological and behavioral problems were not being helped. I just hope the school system finds a better way.