Inheritance

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:No, I was promised inheritance but they never gave me a dime when alive. Dad died and gave most of it to random women. My sibling grabbed the rest. I suspect sibling will get all mom’s money. Till you have it don’t plan with it.

When someone dies you cannot grab money. Personal property, yes. Was it money? What did the estate doc/probate court say? Were you around and helpful to your dad through his life? Was sibling?

DP. You would be surprised. People do this all the time, but to stop it you have to go to court. Which costs a lot in time and $$. There's very little recourse.

We had this with my sis in law. When my MIL was dying, she went through the house and grabbed tons of cash, jewelry, my FIL's watch, etc. She also claimed their mom had given her the cars. My husband just kind of gave up on it because it was hard to prove exactly what she'd taken.

Now SIL also tried to claim their mom (who was literally unconscious) and also given her the house with a quitclaim deed (she had a notary friend fake it), but she'd fortunately done it incompetently and the estate lawyer was able to handle that easily. But we just let a lot of it go because it wasn't worth the legal fees.

Cash? Personal property? Sure. You cannot grab assets unless on the account or you’re the beneficiary.

You can if you're willing to commit fraud.

Then you call the cops. Only way without a joint account is a forged check or online fraudulent transfers but then you need the passcodes.

Because mom has brain cancer and keeps all her codes in a notebook by her computer.

When mom has just died, calling the cops on your sister isn't necessarily an easy decision. My spouse also met with lawyers and it's both difficult to prove and expensive to get the money back.

Trust me, having lived through these circumstances it really isn't easy and you'd understand why people just drop their end of the rope a lot.

I lived through them. Mom’s sibling stole entire inheritance that was to be equally divided among all children. When discovered, sibling was told to sign an agreement: a) acknowledging theft; b) agreeing to monthly payments to others until completely paid in full; c) a life insurance policy naming siblings as beneficiaries until paid off; d) agreeing to plead guilty to theft charges if payments not made in full and on time; and e) if not paid and insufficient life insurance, would be a debt of estate.

Had sibling not signed, a police report would have been filed.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, you really need to reframe this scenario because the additional details you've shared show that it's not really about the inheritance.

Here is the fact pattern:
You have $10M in assets, are married, and are around 50 years old.
Your HHI is $500-700k/year and you plan to work an additional 10-15 years.
You've been saving $50k/year in a brokerage account, in addition to tax-advantaged saving for retirement.
Your parents are 80+ and you expect an inheritance.

Here is your question:
Given the facts above, can you spend the $50k/year instead of continuing to add savings to your brokerage?

And the answer is 100% yes.

OP here - thanks for reframing. other than we want to only work for 5-10 years this is the way to think about it.

Does retiring at 55-60 make the answer still 100%?

Because I do understand that if we keep working till 65 then i know we can spend the extra $50k. It's really spending the $50k
AND retiring in 5-10 years.

Yes, it's still fine. If I were in your shoes, I'd make sure tuition payments were over before I retired, but I'm pretty conservative. I'd also rather work for an extra year or two and really enjoy my money (and get weekly massages / go on great vacations with my teen and college aged kids) than kill myself budgeting and trying to make my big pot of retirement funds bigger.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, you really need to reframe this scenario because the additional details you've shared show that it's not really about the inheritance.

Here is the fact pattern:
You have $10M in assets, are married, and are around 50 years old.
Your HHI is $500-700k/year and you plan to work an additional 10-15 years.
You've been saving $50k/year in a brokerage account, in addition to tax-advantaged saving for retirement.
Your parents are 80+ and you expect an inheritance.

Here is your question:
Given the facts above, can you spend the $50k/year instead of continuing to add savings to your brokerage?

And the answer is 100% yes.

OP here - thanks for reframing. other than we want to only work for 5-10 years this is the way to think about it.

Does retiring at 55-60 make the answer still 100%?

Because I do understand that if we keep working till 65 then i know we can spend the extra $50k. It's really spending the $50k
AND retiring in 5-10 years.

Yes, it's still fine. If I were in your shoes, I'd make sure tuition payments were over before I retired, but I'm pretty conservative. I'd also rather work for an extra year or two and really enjoy my money (and get weekly massages / go on great vacations with my teen and college aged kids) than kill myself budgeting and trying to make my big pot of retirement funds bigger.

Kids have gotten money over the years from the grandparents and that should cover part of college. My belief is that the grandparents want to fund all of the college (so grandkids can know the GP paid for the education versus just some nebulous pot of $$ they don't know about).

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:No, I was promised inheritance but they never gave me a dime when alive. Dad died and gave most of it to random women. My sibling grabbed the rest. I suspect sibling will get all mom’s money. Till you have it don’t plan with it.

When someone dies you cannot grab money. Personal property, yes. Was it money? What did the estate doc/probate court say? Were you around and helpful to your dad through his life? Was sibling?

DP. You would be surprised. People do this all the time, but to stop it you have to go to court. Which costs a lot in time and $$. There's very little recourse.

We had this with my sis in law. When my MIL was dying, she went through the house and grabbed tons of cash, jewelry, my FIL's watch, etc. She also claimed their mom had given her the cars. My husband just kind of gave up on it because it was hard to prove exactly what she'd taken.

Now SIL also tried to claim their mom (who was literally unconscious) and also given her the house with a quitclaim deed (she had a notary friend fake it), but she'd fortunately done it incompetently and the estate lawyer was able to handle that easily. But we just let a lot of it go because it wasn't worth the legal fees.

Cash? Personal property? Sure. You cannot grab assets unless on the account or you’re the beneficiary.

You can if you're willing to commit fraud.

Then you call the cops. Only way without a joint account is a forged check or online fraudulent transfers but then you need the passcodes.

Because mom has brain cancer and keeps all her codes in a notebook by her computer.

When mom has just died, calling the cops on your sister isn't necessarily an easy decision. My spouse also met with lawyers and it's both difficult to prove and expensive to get the money back.

Trust me, having lived through these circumstances it really isn't easy and you'd understand why people just drop their end of the rope a lot.

I lived through them. Mom’s sibling stole entire inheritance that was to be equally divided among all children. When discovered, sibling was told to sign an agreement: a) acknowledging theft; b) agreeing to monthly payments to others until completely paid in full; c) a life insurance policy naming siblings as beneficiaries until paid off; d) agreeing to plead guilty to theft charges if payments not made in full and on time; and e) if not paid and insufficient life insurance, would be a debt of estate.

Had sibling not signed, a police report would have been filed.

Wow. Did an attorney come up with that plan? How long did it take the sibling to pay the other siblings in full?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I do not count on it.

Memory care is $140,000 to more than $220,000 yearly.

They could need memory care and that would eat up 2.5 M pretty quick, especially if there are two.

No way. These estimates are way overblown. First off if you’re in memory care you have no other expenses. You also still earn social security, pension, dividends etc.

The chance of you having someone in memory care for years and the spouse too means you moved them there too early. The average stay isn’t even 2 years.

You should be more worried the market collapses.

Those prices for memory care are definitely not overestimated. Not everyone wants to go to a facility. My parents want full time carers and at $30/hour it's over $250,000 a year plus taxes, and house expenses, meds, etc.

This is crazy expensive and you can use common sense to figure out this is abnormal. There would be a huge market if you could take care of a couple 24-7 and earn $250k without even having a college diploma. Heck even at $150k you could have live-in help.

My own parent ended up in memory care and it cost us all out maybe $250k over 2.5 years at a facility. He earned interest and dividends at this time and his net worth continued to grow.

Do you also think college has to be $80k per year? I ask because it’s a similar mentality and it just means you’re a big spender and aren’t smart about things. Sure, if you want to spend $1 million educating your kids and $1 million on LTC you can do that. But it isn’t necessary.

The providers themselves aren’t getting paid the whole amount, though. Unless this PP just went out and hired people directly and is writing them checks, which I doubt, that cost includes operating costs and a profit margin for their employer.

The point is that if it really was $250k a year for normal care and this was commonplace, there would be a market for this. $250k is a fantastic salary for someone without a degree. Spending that kind of money isn’t necessary.

you're an idiot. it's not $250k. it's $83k each for three people to get 24 hour shifts covered.

You’re absolutely right. We should all plan to spend $250k per year on LTC. Eye roll.

if, for whatever reason, you want care in your home rather than at a facility, then yes, you should budget for that.

it's a pleasant way to live if you're just old and frail rather than living with dementia. and it's progressive- the first several years my grandfather only needed a person for 8 hours a day, to do meals and meds and errands. but then he needed help getting dressed and also help getting to bed, so that became two shifts and a lot harder to coordinate. the last two years he needed 24 hour care. his kids and grandkids didn't live nearby.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:No, I was promised inheritance but they never gave me a dime when alive. Dad died and gave most of it to random women. My sibling grabbed the rest. I suspect sibling will get all mom’s money. Till you have it don’t plan with it.

When someone dies you cannot grab money. Personal property, yes. Was it money? What did the estate doc/probate court say? Were you around and helpful to your dad through his life? Was sibling?

DP. You would be surprised. People do this all the time, but to stop it you have to go to court. Which costs a lot in time and $$. There's very little recourse.

We had this with my sis in law. When my MIL was dying, she went through the house and grabbed tons of cash, jewelry, my FIL's watch, etc. She also claimed their mom had given her the cars. My husband just kind of gave up on it because it was hard to prove exactly what she'd taken.

Now SIL also tried to claim their mom (who was literally unconscious) and also given her the house with a quitclaim deed (she had a notary friend fake it), but she'd fortunately done it incompetently and the estate lawyer was able to handle that easily. But we just let a lot of it go because it wasn't worth the legal fees.

Cash? Personal property? Sure. You cannot grab assets unless on the account or you’re the beneficiary.

You can if you're willing to commit fraud.

Then you call the cops. Only way without a joint account is a forged check or online fraudulent transfers but then you need the passcodes.

Because mom has brain cancer and keeps all her codes in a notebook by her computer.

When mom has just died, calling the cops on your sister isn't necessarily an easy decision. My spouse also met with lawyers and it's both difficult to prove and expensive to get the money back.

Trust me, having lived through these circumstances it really isn't easy and you'd understand why people just drop their end of the rope a lot.

I lived through them. Mom’s sibling stole entire inheritance that was to be equally divided among all children. When discovered, sibling was told to sign an agreement: a) acknowledging theft; b) agreeing to monthly payments to others until completely paid in full; c) a life insurance policy naming siblings as beneficiaries until paid off; d) agreeing to plead guilty to theft charges if payments not made in full and on time; and e) if not paid and insufficient life insurance, would be a debt of estate.

Had sibling not signed, a police report would have been filed.

Wow. Did an attorney come up with that plan? How long did it take the sibling to pay the other siblings in full?

Yes- me. It took about 5 years to repay everyone…but it was repaid fully.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:No, I was promised inheritance but they never gave me a dime when alive. Dad died and gave most of it to random women. My sibling grabbed the rest. I suspect sibling will get all mom’s money. Till you have it don’t plan with it.

When someone dies you cannot grab money. Personal property, yes. Was it money? What did the estate doc/probate court say? Were you around and helpful to your dad through his life? Was sibling?

DP. You would be surprised. People do this all the time, but to stop it you have to go to court. Which costs a lot in time and $$. There's very little recourse.

We had this with my sis in law. When my MIL was dying, she went through the house and grabbed tons of cash, jewelry, my FIL's watch, etc. She also claimed their mom had given her the cars. My husband just kind of gave up on it because it was hard to prove exactly what she'd taken.

Now SIL also tried to claim their mom (who was literally unconscious) and also given her the house with a quitclaim deed (she had a notary friend fake it), but she'd fortunately done it incompetently and the estate lawyer was able to handle that easily. But we just let a lot of it go because it wasn't worth the legal fees.

Cash? Personal property? Sure. You cannot grab assets unless on the account or you’re the beneficiary.

You can if you're willing to commit fraud.

Then you call the cops. Only way without a joint account is a forged check or online fraudulent transfers but then you need the passcodes.

Because mom has brain cancer and keeps all her codes in a notebook by her computer.

When mom has just died, calling the cops on your sister isn't necessarily an easy decision. My spouse also met with lawyers and it's both difficult to prove and expensive to get the money back.

Trust me, having lived through these circumstances it really isn't easy and you'd understand why people just drop their end of the rope a lot.

I lived through them. Mom’s sibling stole entire inheritance that was to be equally divided among all children. When discovered, sibling was told to sign an agreement: a) acknowledging theft; b) agreeing to monthly payments to others until completely paid in full; c) a life insurance policy naming siblings as beneficiaries until paid off; d) agreeing to plead guilty to theft charges if payments not made in full and on time; and e) if not paid and insufficient life insurance, would be a debt of estate.

Had sibling not signed, a police report would have been filed.

Wow. Did an attorney come up with that plan? How long did it take the sibling to pay the other siblings in full?

Yes- me. It took about 5 years to repay everyone…but it was repaid fully.

Excellent. I’m going to make a note of this in case my sibling tries the same thing after my parents pass.

[Anonymous]

Act like nothing is coming.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I do not count on it.

Memory care is $140,000 to more than $220,000 yearly.

They could need memory care and that would eat up 2.5 M pretty quick, especially if there are two.

No way. These estimates are way overblown. First off if you’re in memory care you have no other expenses. You also still earn social security, pension, dividends etc.

The chance of you having someone in memory care for years and the spouse too means you moved them there too early. The average stay isn’t even 2 years.

You should be more worried the market collapses.

Those prices for memory care are definitely not overestimated. Not everyone wants to go to a facility. My parents want full time carers and at $30/hour it's over $250,000 a year plus taxes, and house expenses, meds, etc.

This is crazy expensive and you can use common sense to figure out this is abnormal. There would be a huge market if you could take care of a couple 24-7 and earn $250k without even having a college diploma. Heck even at $150k you could have live-in help.

My own parent ended up in memory care and it cost us all out maybe $250k over 2.5 years at a facility. He earned interest and dividends at this time and his net worth continued to grow.

Do you also think college has to be $80k per year? I ask because it’s a similar mentality and it just means you’re a big spender and aren’t smart about things. Sure, if you want to spend $1 million educating your kids and $1 million on LTC you can do that. But it isn’t necessary.

The providers themselves aren’t getting paid the whole amount, though. Unless this PP just went out and hired people directly and is writing them checks, which I doubt, that cost includes operating costs and a profit margin for their employer.

The point is that if it really was $250k a year for normal care and this was commonplace, there would be a market for this. $250k is a fantastic salary for someone without a degree. Spending that kind of money isn’t necessary.

you're an idiot. it's not $250k. it's $83k each for three people to get 24 hour shifts covered.

NP: it is not $83k/year for 24 hour at home care. The person above said it is $30/hour x 24 x 365 =$262,800/year.

In my own experience w/family, it was closer to $40 per hour for overnight hours - and then even more if the person needed a higher level of care (needs to be wiped, showering the person who can’t stand without significant help, etc.)

So while you’re insulting someone by calling them an idiot- you’re in the wrong. If you double down- post a link showing this rate for a company. Your rate is less than $10/hour.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I do not count on it.

Memory care is $140,000 to more than $220,000 yearly.

They could need memory care and that would eat up 2.5 M pretty quick, especially if there are two.

No way. These estimates are way overblown. First off if you’re in memory care you have no other expenses. You also still earn social security, pension, dividends etc.

The chance of you having someone in memory care for years and the spouse too means you moved them there too early. The average stay isn’t even 2 years.

You should be more worried the market collapses.

Those prices for memory care are definitely not overestimated. Not everyone wants to go to a facility. My parents want full time carers and at $30/hour it's over $250,000 a year plus taxes, and house expenses, meds, etc.

This is crazy expensive and you can use common sense to figure out this is abnormal. There would be a huge market if you could take care of a couple 24-7 and earn $250k without even having a college diploma. Heck even at $150k you could have live-in help.

My own parent ended up in memory care and it cost us all out maybe $250k over 2.5 years at a facility. He earned interest and dividends at this time and his net worth continued to grow.

Do you also think college has to be $80k per year? I ask because it’s a similar mentality and it just means you’re a big spender and aren’t smart about things. Sure, if you want to spend $1 million educating your kids and $1 million on LTC you can do that. But it isn’t necessary.

The providers themselves aren’t getting paid the whole amount, though. Unless this PP just went out and hired people directly and is writing them checks, which I doubt, that cost includes operating costs and a profit margin for their employer.

The point is that if it really was $250k a year for normal care and this was commonplace, there would be a market for this. $250k is a fantastic salary for someone without a degree. Spending that kind of money isn’t necessary.

you're an idiot. it's not $250k. it's $83k each for three people to get 24 hour shifts covered.

NP: it is not $83k/year for 24 hour at home care. The person above said it is $30/hour x 24 x 365 =$262,800/year.

In my own experience w/family, it was closer to $40 per hour for overnight hours - and then even more if the person needed a higher level of care (needs to be wiped, showering the person who can’t stand without significant help, etc.)

So while you’re insulting someone by calling them an idiot- you’re in the wrong. If you double down- post a link showing this rate for a company. Your rate is less than $10/hour.

My mom is at $152k as of this morning. Not even halfway through the year.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP Here - thanks for the responses. I will respond to individual posts but in generally I believe it's smart to think about these things. It's not grubby or anything like that.

but some background. my wife and I save. I like to save more than she does.

We are 50 years old and have $9-10MM in investable assets and $2MM in Real estate equity. Our HHI income is on the order of $500-700K depending on the year.

She wants to completely spend our HHI each year now. Does not want to save anymore.

Is she being reasonable? Normally I say no but not so sure anymore.

Two sets of parents. 1 of them aren't in the greatest shape and i could see a decade of memory care for both of them. My haircut assumption is $2MM in that case. The other set is healthier and really need to be planning on another 15-20 years. So who knows on that one but i haircut that to be $2MM as well.

In retirement we want to be able to spend exactly (if not more) than we spend today.

Normal retirement planning says withdraw 4% a year. so, in our case that would be 400k. we are about 100-200k short. Hence save is my view.

Wife view - expenses go down so today's life style costs alot less without expenses for kids. And 4% of some value for the inheritance gets us to the 100-200k number anyway.

is she correct?

p.s. we are very lucky. historically we have lived below our means.

Your wife is correct. You are very very likely to die with millions in the bank, and you may wish that you had spent more when you were more able to enjoy it.

How about split the difference between the amount she'd like to spend and the amount you'd be comfortable spending?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I do not count on it.

Memory care is $140,000 to more than $220,000 yearly.

They could need memory care and that would eat up 2.5 M pretty quick, especially if there are two.

No way. These estimates are way overblown. First off if you’re in memory care you have no other expenses. You also still earn social security, pension, dividends etc.

The chance of you having someone in memory care for years and the spouse too means you moved them there too early. The average stay isn’t even 2 years.

You should be more worried the market collapses.

Those prices for memory care are definitely not overestimated. Not everyone wants to go to a facility. My parents want full time carers and at $30/hour it's over $250,000 a year plus taxes, and house expenses, meds, etc.

This is crazy expensive and you can use common sense to figure out this is abnormal. There would be a huge market if you could take care of a couple 24-7 and earn $250k without even having a college diploma. Heck even at $150k you could have live-in help.

My own parent ended up in memory care and it cost us all out maybe $250k over 2.5 years at a facility. He earned interest and dividends at this time and his net worth continued to grow.

Do you also think college has to be $80k per year? I ask because it’s a similar mentality and it just means you’re a big spender and aren’t smart about things. Sure, if you want to spend $1 million educating your kids and $1 million on LTC you can do that. But it isn’t necessary.

The providers themselves aren’t getting paid the whole amount, though. Unless this PP just went out and hired people directly and is writing them checks, which I doubt, that cost includes operating costs and a profit margin for their employer.

The point is that if it really was $250k a year for normal care and this was commonplace, there would be a market for this. $250k is a fantastic salary for someone without a degree. Spending that kind of money isn’t necessary.

you're an idiot. it's not $250k. it's $83k each for three people to get 24 hour shifts covered.

NP: it is not $83k/year for 24 hour at home care. The person above said it is $30/hour x 24 x 365 =$262,800/year.

In my own experience w/family, it was closer to $40 per hour for overnight hours - and then even more if the person needed a higher level of care (needs to be wiped, showering the person who can’t stand without significant help, etc.)

So while you’re insulting someone by calling them an idiot- you’re in the wrong. If you double down- post a link showing this rate for a company. Your rate is less than $10/hour.

My mom is at $152k as of this morning. Not even halfway through the year.

I manage the care for my uncle who needs 24/7 care. It costs about $175k/year. However, he spends close to zero beyond that. Many $400/month for groceries and supplies, his rent, and cable. There are no vacations, going out to dinner, buying gifts, etc etc. He can’t do any of that. So he ends up spending not too much more than he did when he was well.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP Here - thanks for the responses. I will respond to individual posts but in generally I believe it's smart to think about these things. It's not grubby or anything like that.

but some background. my wife and I save. I like to save more than she does.

We are 50 years old and have $9-10MM in investable assets and $2MM in Real estate equity. Our HHI income is on the order of $500-700K depending on the year.

She wants to completely spend our HHI each year now. Does not want to save anymore.

Is she being reasonable? Normally I say no but not so sure anymore.

Two sets of parents. 1 of them aren't in the greatest shape and i could see a decade of memory care for both of them. My haircut assumption is $2MM in that case. The other set is healthier and really need to be planning on another 15-20 years. So who knows on that one but i haircut that to be $2MM as well.

In retirement we want to be able to spend exactly (if not more) than we spend today.

Normal retirement planning says withdraw 4% a year. so, in our case that would be 400k. we are about 100-200k short. Hence save is my view.

Wife view - expenses go down so today's life style costs alot less without expenses for kids. And 4% of some value for the inheritance gets us to the 100-200k number anyway.

is she correct?

p.s. we are very lucky. historically we have lived below our means.

Your wife is correct. You are very very likely to die with millions in the bank, and you may wish that you had spent more when you were more able to enjoy it.

How about split the difference between the amount she'd like to spend and the amount you'd be comfortable spending?

I think some great ideas here in the thread - in terms of how to look at it. I think we should do a couple of years of excess spending. We can revisit in 2 years if the savings are going off track.

[Anonymous]

My parents are in their mid 70s and I’m 40. They are quite wealthy as in ultra high net worth. I’m sure I will inherit a large sum but we are very focused on planning for ourselves. What I do inherit will likely benefit my children and someday my grandchildren. My parents never inherited a meaningful amount of money. My parents have already been very generous so I’m very lucky.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, you really need to reframe this scenario because the additional details you've shared show that it's not really about the inheritance.

Here is the fact pattern:
You have $10M in assets, are married, and are around 50 years old.
Your HHI is $500-700k/year and you plan to work an additional 10-15 years.
You've been saving $50k/year in a brokerage account, in addition to tax-advantaged saving for retirement.
Your parents are 80+ and you expect an inheritance.

Here is your question:
Given the facts above, can you spend the $50k/year instead of continuing to add savings to your brokerage?

And the answer is 100% yes.

OP here - thanks for reframing. other than we want to only work for 5-10 years this is the way to think about it.

Does retiring at 55-60 make the answer still 100%?

Because I do understand that if we keep working till 65 then i know we can spend the extra $50k. It's really spending the $50k
AND retiring in 5-10 years.

Yes, it's still fine. If I were in your shoes, I'd make sure tuition payments were over before I retired, but I'm pretty conservative. I'd also rather work for an extra year or two and really enjoy my money (and get weekly massages / go on great vacations with my teen and college aged kids) than kill myself budgeting and trying to make my big pot of retirement funds bigger.

Kids have gotten money over the years from the grandparents and that should cover part of college. My belief is that the grandparents want to fund all of the college (so grandkids can know the GP paid for the education versus just some nebulous pot of $$ they don't know about).

Is this OP? You're certainly relying on a lot...