Goal as a parent for DC to never work non-prof jobs?

[Anonymous]

Working stupid retail, Deli and restaurant jobs (plus nannying and babysitting) was really good for me. Most of the people I respect had random jobs like that as middle class teens and young adults.

My kid has worked as a camp counselor and I've had her get certified to be a lifeguard and a soccer ref. It's good for her to be able to make her own money and start building a work history.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My family is spending $50,000 per year per child by the time they are in 2nd grade (tuition, EC, enrichment activities).
Why on God's green earth would I have them wash dishes for a few thousand dollars per summer?
Crappy jobs are not the only place where they can learn work ethic, people skills, compassion, etc.

Where are your kids learning those skills?

NP, not the PP who everyone is mocking. We're UMC and college DS has never had a hamburger-flipping job. He just went straight to the professional environment jobs / internships in media. law, lobbying and now consulting.

He has a shit ton of grit and excellent people skills, and selective (not universal) compassion.

Places where he learned grit:

backcountry backpacking and camping
graduating from a crazy rigorous, soul sucking school that causes kids to have mental breakdowns
engaging in a dangerous, frustrating hobby for years (think ice climbing or welding)
living with a chronic, managed disease

Places where he learned compassion:
caring for dying relative, including toileting and feeding
caring for his sick and dying pets
holding his dog while his dog died, so that the dog's last image would be the loving face of my DS
protecting his childhood classmate with cognitive deficits from classroom bullies

Working the greasy griddle isn't the only way

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My family is spending $50,000 per year per child by the time they are in 2nd grade (tuition, EC, enrichment activities).
Why on God's green earth would I have them wash dishes for a few thousand dollars per summer?
Crappy jobs are not the only place where they can learn work ethic, people skills, compassion, etc.

Where are your kids learning those skills?

NP, not the PP who everyone is mocking. We're UMC and college DS has never had a hamburger-flipping job. He just went straight to the professional environment jobs / internships in media. law, lobbying and now consulting.

He has a shit ton of grit and excellent people skills, and selective (not universal) compassion.

Places where he learned grit:

backcountry backpacking and camping
graduating from a crazy rigorous, soul sucking school that causes kids to have mental breakdowns
engaging in a dangerous, frustrating hobby for years (think ice climbing or welding)
living with a chronic, managed disease

Places where he learned compassion:
caring for dying relative, including toileting and feeding
caring for his sick and dying pets
holding his dog while his dog died, so that the dog's last image would be the loving face of my DS
protecting his childhood classmate with cognitive deficits from classroom bullies

Working the greasy griddle isn't the only way

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Lolz all these umc whites contemplating letting their kids do minimum wage jobs to build resilience yet have daddy’s law firm to fall back on when they flunk out of school

lolz that you think UMC whites with law parter fathers would flunk out of school. We got the nature AND the nurture, my friend. Failure isn't a thing in this crowd, sorry

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:No job is beneath you.

My young adult son is twenty-six years old and has just finished his MBA at University of Chicago Booth school of business. From the age of thirteen until eighteen, he worked at a country club to clean up golf carts, golf clubs, pick up trash on tennis courts, etc... He also played jr. golf at that time. Working at a country club allowed him to practice at the driving range and improved his golf game. That opportunity only opens up connections later on. He went to a D3 school and played golf there. He received a job after college from one of the connections he made at the country club. When he applied for MBA school, one of the members of the club was a sustaining donnor to the University of Chicago, and he called the school on my son's behalf. He got a job offered by another member of the club upon receiving his MBA degree. It is not what you know but who you know (or who knows you).

Yes rich people helping other rich people out. That usually is the case

Wrong. Kids with rich parents do not work at country clubs doing menial work. Rich people don't help anyone unless they bring something to the table. This kid played junior golf, and he was probably good. That's the reason they wanted to help him.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My family is spending $50,000 per year per child by the time they are in 2nd grade (tuition, EC, enrichment activities).
Why on God's green earth would I have them wash dishes for a few thousand dollars per summer?
Crappy jobs are not the only place where they can learn work ethic, people skills, compassion, etc.

Where are your kids learning those skills?

Exactly! It’s ok to not want them to wash dishes and other “crappy jobs” as you wrote, but where are they learning the skills instead??

If you are seriously asking a question, I will seriously answer:
they can learn work ethic by helping to build a house with Habitat for Humanity;
they can learn compassion by translating for migrants trying to enroll their own children into school;
they can learn people skills by working as a receptionist at my firm and offering coffee and an apology to clients who are pissed that they have to wait 90 seconds to meet me.
And guess what? In these environments, they won't be sexually harassed or be made to feel stupid because they have a low rank.

Take a poll with college students on which job they would prefer for the summer, a cocktail waitress at a summer resort making $500 a night or sit at a desk all day greeting people for $20 an hour?

You are clueless.

Take a poll with recent college graduates on how many have actual professional jobs.

You are a clueless (in a way that can really damage a young person's prospects in life). But your point is well taken.

What amazes me is how many parents here think their kids are going to slide right into some big money professional job at graduation.

The subject is summer jobs for high schoolers and college students. So this parent suggests a receptionist job to see how the underlings feel. That’s not the reason for summer jobs. And her college graduate will know what it feels to have a low level office job soon enough.

Who do you suppose is more likely to "know what it feels to have a low level office job soon enough," the dude who worked washing dishes summers or the dude who "worked" at his father's law firm summers?

I suppose that all the data on passing down advantages is just made up, right?

Most people don’t fall into either of those categories, they are a small minority. Plus law school is a trade school that provides you with a specific skill set and license. They don’t need a relative to obtain an internship. Law school is not like some nonspecific business degree that did not provide a specific skill.

Half of college students graduating currently are not working in their field of study. Many are working in low paid jobs.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:No job is beneath you.

My young adult son is twenty-six years old and has just finished his MBA at University of Chicago Booth school of business. From the age of thirteen until eighteen, he worked at a country club to clean up golf carts, golf clubs, pick up trash on tennis courts, etc... He also played jr. golf at that time. Working at a country club allowed him to practice at the driving range and improved his golf game. That opportunity only opens up connections later on. He went to a D3 school and played golf there. He received a job after college from one of the connections he made at the country club. When he applied for MBA school, one of the members of the club was a sustaining donnor to the University of Chicago, and he called the school on my son's behalf. He got a job offered by another member of the club upon receiving his MBA degree. It is not what you know but who you know (or who knows you).

Yes rich people helping other rich people out. That usually is the case

Wrong. Kids with rich parents do not work at country clubs doing menial work. Rich people don't help anyone unless they bring something to the table. This kid played junior golf, and he was probably good. That's the reason they wanted to help him.

I wrote a post earlier that my husband worked as a caddie at the country club his family belonged to. He was also on the swim team and the jr golf team.

If the poster you’re talking about was a caddie the members would get to know him. If he just cleaned up it’s doubtful.

[Anonymous]

I feel pretty strongly about my kids getting real jobs in HS and I do think customer service jobs teach you a lot that’s hard to learn elsewhere.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My family is spending $50,000 per year per child by the time they are in 2nd grade (tuition, EC, enrichment activities).
Why on God's green earth would I have them wash dishes for a few thousand dollars per summer?
Crappy jobs are not the only place where they can learn work ethic, people skills, compassion, etc.

Where are your kids learning those skills?

NP, not the PP who everyone is mocking. We're UMC and college DS has never had a hamburger-flipping job. He just went straight to the professional environment jobs / internships in media. law, lobbying and now consulting.

He has a shit ton of grit and excellent people skills, and selective (not universal) compassion.

Places where he learned grit:

backcountry backpacking and camping
graduating from a crazy rigorous, soul sucking school that causes kids to have mental breakdowns
engaging in a dangerous, frustrating hobby for years (think ice climbing or welding)
living with a chronic, managed disease

Places where he learned compassion:
caring for dying relative, including toileting and feeding
caring for his sick and dying pets
holding his dog while his dog died, so that the dog's last image would be the loving face of my DS
protecting his childhood classmate with cognitive deficits from classroom bullies

Working the greasy griddle isn't the only way

This is so weird

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My family is spending $50,000 per year per child by the time they are in 2nd grade (tuition, EC, enrichment activities).
Why on God's green earth would I have them wash dishes for a few thousand dollars per summer?
Crappy jobs are not the only place where they can learn work ethic, people skills, compassion, etc.

Where are your kids learning those skills?

NP, not the PP who everyone is mocking. We're UMC and college DS has never had a hamburger-flipping job. He just went straight to the professional environment jobs / internships in media. law, lobbying and now consulting.

He has a shit ton of grit and excellent people skills, and selective (not universal) compassion.

Places where he learned grit:

backcountry backpacking and camping
graduating from a crazy rigorous, soul sucking school that causes kids to have mental breakdowns
engaging in a dangerous, frustrating hobby for years (think ice climbing or welding)
living with a chronic, managed disease

Places where he learned compassion:
caring for dying relative, including toileting and feeding
caring for his sick and dying pets
holding his dog while his dog died, so that the dog's last image would be the loving face of my DS
protecting his childhood classmate with cognitive deficits from classroom bullies

Working the greasy griddle isn't the only way

This is so weird

The emoji or the post they were reacting to? The post was very weird.

[Anonymous]

I agree. My Senior had an internship working on a project with the James Webb Telescope. This is in the field of her desired career. Next summer, she wants to study abroad with an internship that is painter has stipend and expenses within the same field. I want experiences that contribute to her desired career only. She will not be needing to know what shift work is like so it is unimportant for her to have a “nothingburger” job.

[Anonymous]

Grew up blue collar and never had one. Not for lack of trying, never hired. Knew I needed an education so went back and finished school

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My family is spending $50,000 per year per child by the time they are in 2nd grade (tuition, EC, enrichment activities).
Why on God's green earth would I have them wash dishes for a few thousand dollars per summer?
Crappy jobs are not the only place where they can learn work ethic, people skills, compassion, etc.

Where are your kids learning those skills?

NP, not the PP who everyone is mocking. We're UMC and college DS has never had a hamburger-flipping job. He just went straight to the professional environment jobs / internships in media. law, lobbying and now consulting.

He has a shit ton of grit and excellent people skills, and selective (not universal) compassion.

Places where he learned grit:

backcountry backpacking and camping
graduating from a crazy rigorous, soul sucking school that causes kids to have mental breakdowns
engaging in a dangerous, frustrating hobby for years (think ice climbing or welding)
living with a chronic, managed disease

Places where he learned compassion:
caring for dying relative, including toileting and feeding
caring for his sick and dying pets
holding his dog while his dog died, so that the dog's last image would be the loving face of my DS
protecting his childhood classmate with cognitive deficits from classroom bullies

Working the greasy griddle isn't the only way

This is so weird

The emoji or the post they were reacting to? The post was very weird.

Post was weird I agree

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My family is spending $50,000 per year per child by the time they are in 2nd grade (tuition, EC, enrichment activities).
Why on God's green earth would I have them wash dishes for a few thousand dollars per summer?
Crappy jobs are not the only place where they can learn work ethic, people skills, compassion, etc.

Where are your kids learning those skills?

NP, not the PP who everyone is mocking. We're UMC and college DS has never had a hamburger-flipping job. He just went straight to the professional environment jobs / internships in media. law, lobbying and now consulting.

He has a shit ton of grit and excellent people skills, and selective (not universal) compassion.

Places where he learned grit:

backcountry backpacking and camping
graduating from a crazy rigorous, soul sucking school that causes kids to have mental breakdowns
engaging in a dangerous, frustrating hobby for years (think ice climbing or welding)
living with a chronic, managed disease

Places where he learned compassion:
caring for dying relative, including toileting and feeding
caring for his sick and dying pets
holding his dog while his dog died, so that the dog's last image would be the loving face of my DS
protecting his childhood classmate with cognitive deficits from classroom bullies

Working the greasy griddle isn't the only way

I've worked with dozens of kids like yours. They're largely worthless.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I agree. My Senior had an internship working on a project with the James Webb Telescope. This is in the field of her desired career. Next summer, she wants to study abroad with an internship that is painter has stipend and expenses within the same field. I want experiences that contribute to her desired career only. She will not be needing to know what shift work is like so it is unimportant for her to have a “nothingburger” job.

Fine, as long as she refrains from ever voicing opinions about what working class people should or shouldn’t do to improve their situation. And watch out for her sense of self-importance. When she eventually gets her desired career, she’ll likely work alongside people who have had “nothingburger” jobs, and they can smell that from a mile away.