Dealing with sadness over disappointing vacation?

[Anonymous]

OP - the problem is you. It's got to be you. Ordinarily, people find some humor in situations that don't go well --- unless it's life threatening.

You don't like to spend the money. Or you are thinking "travel" is going to transform your family, somehow. You need to seriously adjust your budget and how you allocate emotions.

[Anonymous]

I know it sounds trite, but time heals most wounds. It's ok to feel sad about it for while, just try not to get stuck and perseverate longer term.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I got food poisoning once on day 1 and spent the entire expensive vacation in an expensive hotel room bathroom floor while my DH did a few of the expensive excursions by himself and we let the other ones go to waste. It was awful, and frankly 8 years later it still is to remember. I always plan for bad weather wherever we go and my expectations there are always low, but you can’t plan for debilitating illness.

Food poisoning is not a debilitating illness. Try an auto-immune disease on for size. Or maybe threw in a few brain tumors. :roll:

This isn’t a contest. You don’t win anything by playing the biggest victim. Other people have their own problems, it’s not your job to put them in their place.

Some things are objectively not as big of a deal as others. Think hang nail vs broken leg. Not everyone deserves a pity party when they are being a grown up baby.

Nobody ever really “deserves” anything. Go start your own post about your miserable life and maybe someone will humor you.

People who are going through real hardships deserve sympathy and help. You have clearly never experienced any real debilitating illness. Instead of throwing a tantrum, be grateful.

People going through real hardships deserve empathy - but don't get to tell everyone else that the ups and downs of our own lives don't matter because they relate to thinks that aren't at the bottom rung of the hierarchies of needs.

OP didn't say her life is over and she'll never enjoy everything again. She's bummed out that a trip she was looking forward to was a bust. That is normal and human - she doesn't have to be told that at least she's not dying of cancer.

You and op both lack perspective. If you had that, you’d get it. But you don’t, so you don’t get it.

Maybe this isn't the thread for you.

Oh I think it is. Again if you had perspective you’d just be grateful you were able to get away and afford a vacation. Miserable people are always going to lack empathy for others and try to turn other people’s experiences back to themselves.

Fixed it for you. Stop trying to make everyone’s experience about you. And the only miserable negative person on this thread is you.

I’m not the one complaining about an expensive vacation when most people in the world don’t even have enough food much less time and money to vacation but you do you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I got food poisoning once on day 1 and spent the entire expensive vacation in an expensive hotel room bathroom floor while my DH did a few of the expensive excursions by himself and we let the other ones go to waste. It was awful, and frankly 8 years later it still is to remember. I always plan for bad weather wherever we go and my expectations there are always low, but you can’t plan for debilitating illness.

Food poisoning is not a debilitating illness. Try an auto-immune disease on for size. Or maybe threw in a few brain tumors. :roll:

This isn’t a contest. You don’t win anything by playing the biggest victim. Other people have their own problems, it’s not your job to put them in their place.

Some things are objectively not as big of a deal as others. Think hang nail vs broken leg. Not everyone deserves a pity party when they are being a grown up baby.

Nobody ever really “deserves” anything. Go start your own post about your miserable life and maybe someone will humor you.

People who are going through real hardships deserve sympathy and help. You have clearly never experienced any real debilitating illness. Instead of throwing a tantrum, be grateful.

People going through real hardships deserve empathy - but don't get to tell everyone else that the ups and downs of our own lives don't matter because they relate to thinks that aren't at the bottom rung of the hierarchies of needs.

OP didn't say her life is over and she'll never enjoy everything again. She's bummed out that a trip she was looking forward to was a bust. That is normal and human - she doesn't have to be told that at least she's not dying of cancer.

You and op both lack perspective. If you had that, you’d get it. But you don’t, so you don’t get it.

Maybe this isn't the thread for you.

Oh I think it is. Again if you had perspective you’d just be grateful you were able to get away and afford a vacation. Miserable people are always going to lack empathy for others and try to turn other people’s experiences back to themselves.

Fixed it for you. Stop trying to make everyone’s experience about you. And the only miserable negative person on this thread is you.

I’m not the one complaining about an expensive vacation when most people in the world don’t even have enough food much less time and money to vacation but you do you.

Ok but OP knows her audience. This is a travel board frequented by MC/UMC people. It’s appropriate the vent here about a disappointing vacation

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP - the problem is you. It's got to be you. Ordinarily, people find some humor in situations that don't go well --- unless it's life threatening.

You don't like to spend the money. Or you are thinking "travel" is going to transform your family, somehow. You need to seriously adjust your budget and how you allocate emotions.

I think it’s normal to acknowledge a feeling of disappointment, process it, maybe get to the root of what the issue(s) were to solve it in the future and then once a little time has passed pinpoint the good parts and laugh about the bad parts.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I got food poisoning once on day 1 and spent the entire expensive vacation in an expensive hotel room bathroom floor while my DH did a few of the expensive excursions by himself and we let the other ones go to waste. It was awful, and frankly 8 years later it still is to remember. I always plan for bad weather wherever we go and my expectations there are always low, but you can’t plan for debilitating illness.

Food poisoning is not a debilitating illness. Try an auto-immune disease on for size. Or maybe threw in a few brain tumors. :roll:

This isn’t a contest. You don’t win anything by playing the biggest victim. Other people have their own problems, it’s not your job to put them in their place.

Some things are objectively not as big of a deal as others. Think hang nail vs broken leg. Not everyone deserves a pity party when they are being a grown up baby.

Nobody ever really “deserves” anything. Go start your own post about your miserable life and maybe someone will humor you.

People who are going through real hardships deserve sympathy and help. You have clearly never experienced any real debilitating illness. Instead of throwing a tantrum, be grateful.

People going through real hardships deserve empathy - but don't get to tell everyone else that the ups and downs of our own lives don't matter because they relate to thinks that aren't at the bottom rung of the hierarchies of needs.

OP didn't say her life is over and she'll never enjoy everything again. She's bummed out that a trip she was looking forward to was a bust. That is normal and human - she doesn't have to be told that at least she's not dying of cancer.

You and op both lack perspective. If you had that, you’d get it. But you don’t, so you don’t get it.

Maybe this isn't the thread for you.

Oh I think it is. Again if you had perspective you’d just be grateful you were able to get away and afford a vacation. Miserable people are always going to lack empathy for others and try to turn other people’s experiences back to themselves.

Fixed it for you. Stop trying to make everyone’s experience about you. And the only miserable negative person on this thread is you.

I’m not the one complaining about an expensive vacation when most people in the world don’t even have enough food much less time and money to vacation but you do you.

Why are you even on DCUM. You could literally go into almost any sub forum and find posters venting about things much more trivial than not having enough food to eat. Go check out the real estate forum or some of the random stuff in off topic. Or some of the ridiculous relationship drama in those forums. Or the sports forum with parents venting about their kids’ travel sports. Like the entire point of an online discussion forum is to have an anonymous place to vent/discuss/ask for advice about stuff big and small.

If you are going to be upset/judgmental of anyone complaining about something that doesn’t rise to to a level of death or starvation, then perhaps internet forums are not for you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I got food poisoning once on day 1 and spent the entire expensive vacation in an expensive hotel room bathroom floor while my DH did a few of the expensive excursions by himself and we let the other ones go to waste. It was awful, and frankly 8 years later it still is to remember. I always plan for bad weather wherever we go and my expectations there are always low, but you can’t plan for debilitating illness.

Food poisoning is not a debilitating illness. Try an auto-immune disease on for size. Or maybe threw in a few brain tumors. :roll:

This isn’t a contest. You don’t win anything by playing the biggest victim. Other people have their own problems, it’s not your job to put them in their place.

Some things are objectively not as big of a deal as others. Think hang nail vs broken leg. Not everyone deserves a pity party when they are being a grown up baby.

Nobody ever really “deserves” anything. Go start your own post about your miserable life and maybe someone will humor you.

People who are going through real hardships deserve sympathy and help. You have clearly never experienced any real debilitating illness. Instead of throwing a tantrum, be grateful.

People going through real hardships deserve empathy - but don't get to tell everyone else that the ups and downs of our own lives don't matter because they relate to thinks that aren't at the bottom rung of the hierarchies of needs.

OP didn't say her life is over and she'll never enjoy everything again. She's bummed out that a trip she was looking forward to was a bust. That is normal and human - she doesn't have to be told that at least she's not dying of cancer.

You and op both lack perspective. If you had that, you’d get it. But you don’t, so you don’t get it.

Maybe this isn't the thread for you.

Oh I think it is. Again if you had perspective you’d just be grateful you were able to get away and afford a vacation. Miserable people are always going to lack empathy for others and try to turn other people’s experiences back to themselves.

Fixed it for you. Stop trying to make everyone’s experience about you. And the only miserable negative person on this thread is you.

I’m not the one complaining about an expensive vacation when most people in the world don’t even have enough food much less time and money to vacation but you do you.

Why are you even on DCUM. You could literally go into almost any sub forum and find posters venting about things much more trivial than not having enough food to eat. Go check out the real estate forum or some of the random stuff in off topic. Or some of the ridiculous relationship drama in those forums. Or the sports forum with parents venting about their kids’ travel sports. Like the entire point of an online discussion forum is to have an anonymous place to vent/discuss/ask for advice about stuff big and small.

If you are going to be upset/judgmental of anyone complaining about something that doesn’t rise to to a level of death or starvation, then perhaps internet forums are not for you.

And I’ll add that if you see a topic on here that does not resonate you could … just not click/contribute to it.

I’m sure you don’t even realize the irony that you are posting to complain about people posting to complain about trivial things. … think about that …

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You need some perspective. Some people never get to take vacation. Some people are dealing with truly terrible things in their lives. In the grand scheme of things, you should consider yourself lucky that a disappointing vacation is the cause of your sadness.

I couldn't afford a vacation this year or last, not even a quick getaway, and still I feel bad for the OP. I can appreciate it sucks when you plan, look forward to it, watch travel videos, build up an image in your mind and then it just falls flat.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Our summer vacation this year was a funeral.

I mean literally.

Heart goes out to you. Same for our family.

[Anonymous]

Did the OP ever post where she went and with whom? Vacations gone bad are usually in a few categories. Here are the top 5.

1. Who you travel with is the biggest one. Grandparents! Behaved miserably, wouldn’t let others do activities, complained the whole time. Siblings! One is control, super mommy and tried to orchestrate around her snowflakes, freaked out when not enough gratitude was shown to her for doing everything l Teenagers! They are becoming independent so the idea of family fun filled memories is a drag, they bicker, are moody and told you they hate you when you said they couldn’t sit in the hotel room on their phone all day.

2. Cruise or Disney. These can go horribly wrong. You get sold the idea of this great vacation and it’s a battle to find a spot at the pool, long lines, crappy food.

3. AirBNB . These can be great or go horribly wrong.

4. Weather. You didn’t research the weather and make up back up plans in the event of rain. You are inflexible and not willing to walk around in the rain. There was a natural disaster or state of emergency that shut everything down.

5. Illness. Someone became seriously ill. Someone got food poisoning, covid.

[Anonymous]

OP, to answer your question, I have found that time gives you the perspective to find humor in what went wrong. Also, as others have said, your next good vacation will help you move on from the disappointment.

[Anonymous]

I've never had a "bad" vacation. But we always make sure that we have staff, plans in case of bad weather or social unrest (move to another locale). Sounds like you learnt a valuable lesson in planning and trip management.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I've never had a "bad" vacation. But we always make sure that we have staff, plans in case of bad weather or social unrest (move to another locale). Sounds like you learnt a valuable lesson in planning and trip management.

Next time OP should bring "staff." So helpful!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Did OP ever post where they went??

Gotta be Disney!

DP here. Nah, Disney is totally predictable. My guess is a national park or foreign country. We did a big national park trip and had unseasonably bad weather, plus my kids eventually got bored of hiking and being cold. In the end, it was overrated. Thankfully we didn’t overspend and we had another trip planned a few months later that went great.

“Trip to Europe” was my guess too. They went to Paris or Venice or whatever and found it dirty, smelly, under construction, super crowded and very expensive, everything took 3x longer than they were expecting. Or stuff was closed, there was a strike, public transit/trains between cities were confusing, etc. And planning it was a whole pain in the ass that took months and loads of effort and $$$ and OP is feeling like it was all a waste.

I know it’s not a super cool flex for the well traveled … buuuuut there’s a reason most people default to stuff like Caribbean all inclusives, beaches in Mexico, or cruises or Disney or whatever. They are well oiled machines and know how to deliver a good, and more importantly predictable, experience.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I got food poisoning once on day 1 and spent the entire expensive vacation in an expensive hotel room bathroom floor while my DH did a few of the expensive excursions by himself and we let the other ones go to waste. It was awful, and frankly 8 years later it still is to remember. I always plan for bad weather wherever we go and my expectations there are always low, but you can’t plan for debilitating illness.

Food poisoning is not a debilitating illness. Try an auto-immune disease on for size. Or maybe threw in a few brain tumors. :roll:

This isn’t a contest. You don’t win anything by playing the biggest victim. Other people have their own problems, it’s not your job to put them in their place.

Some things are objectively not as big of a deal as others. Think hang nail vs broken leg. Not everyone deserves a pity party when they are being a grown up baby.

Nobody ever really “deserves” anything. Go start your own post about your miserable life and maybe someone will humor you.

People who are going through real hardships deserve sympathy and help. You have clearly never experienced any real debilitating illness. Instead of throwing a tantrum, be grateful.

People going through real hardships deserve empathy - but don't get to tell everyone else that the ups and downs of our own lives don't matter because they relate to thinks that aren't at the bottom rung of the hierarchies of needs.

OP didn't say her life is over and she'll never enjoy everything again. She's bummed out that a trip she was looking forward to was a bust. That is normal and human - she doesn't have to be told that at least she's not dying of cancer.

You and op both lack perspective. If you had that, you’d get it. But you don’t, so you don’t get it.

Maybe this isn't the thread for you.

Oh I think it is. Again if you had perspective you’d just be grateful you were able to get away and afford a vacation. Miserable people are always going to lack empathy for others and try to turn other people’s experiences back to themselves.

Fixed it for you. Stop trying to make everyone’s experience about you. And the only miserable negative person on this thread is you.

I’m not the one complaining about an expensive vacation when most people in the world don’t even have enough food much less time and money to vacation but you do you.

Ok but OP knows her audience. This is a travel board frequented by MC/UMC people. It’s appropriate the vent here about a disappointing vacation

+1. PP is in the wrong forum.