AITA: Wife Bought Expensive Furniture W/O My Consent

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think this is your wife:

https://www.dcurbanmom.com/jforum/posts/list/1211753.page

Wait until you see the $1400 stroller!

Strollers cost, man. And the expensive ones are dramatically better. If you’re not spending as much on a stroller as you would on a bike you’re going to ride every day, you’re doing it wrong imo.

My kids are teens- so glad we got away with the $250 Graco stroller. It was not
A thing then to have a stroller as a status symbol.

OP here. It’s not a status symbol. We walk a lot ( and run) and my wife wants a quality stroller that she can use for walks. It was highly recommended by man so she decided that’s the one she wants. It comes with bassinet ( for when baby is young) and a carseat.

I’m just not buying that the OP is a man. Somethings not adding up with the detailed responses.

This whole thread is a cleverly-worded humblebrag that's posing as a sympathy-seeking reassurance request that he's not the AH. Several of the responses claim to be OP, and there are a few others that just sound like him ("dude" who wouldn't want to live in a relationship where he and his wife had to talk about money because "they could afford it" is a peak sockpuppet contender).

Which makes him an undeniable AH.

OP here. You’re not as clever as you think. That was not me. I don’t call people “ dude” or act like my wife runs my life. That man is a simp.

[Anonymous]

I’m bored of this.

[Anonymous]

Where is the stuff from? I am fascinated that it’s possible to add up to $6600 with a crib, glider, changing table and dresser. I have a 1 and 4 year old so I’m not out of touch with baby stuff prices!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:How much over?

Technically if each individual piece was within the limit, she did nothing wrong.

OP here. It was $6600. Most of the items were exceeding the $500. I’m just annoyed she did not let me know about a purchase this large.

I’d be super pissed for a lot of reasons. Money would be one. That’s a ridiculous amount. Second would be violation of our agreement. Third would be excluding me from participating in decorating the baby’s room.

OP here. This may sound bad but I don’t care about decorating the nursery. I will set it up but I could care less what the decor looks like. Same with our home. I let her pick it all because I don’t care about those things.

Well, she does. I'm sure there are things you care about that cost money.

I looked up Larkin cribs, etc. They are mid-range; you can get what she bought at Pottery Barn. Not over the top at all, given that you admit you could afford them.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I’m bored of this.

OP here. Be an adult and move along. No one is forcing you to stay. Please grow up.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Where is the stuff from? I am fascinated that it’s possible to add up to $6600 with a crib, glider, changing table and dresser. I have a 1 and 4 year old so I’m not out of touch with baby stuff prices!

OP here. Pottery Barn Kids.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:How much over?

Technically if each individual piece was within the limit, she did nothing wrong.

OP here. It was $6600. Most of the items were exceeding the $500. I’m just annoyed she did not let me know about a purchase this large.

I’d be super pissed for a lot of reasons. Money would be one. That’s a ridiculous amount. Second would be violation of our agreement. Third would be excluding me from participating in decorating the baby’s room.

OP here. This may sound bad but I don’t care about decorating the nursery. I will set it up but I could care less what the decor looks like. Same with our home. I let her pick it all because I don’t care about those things.

Well, she does. I'm sure there are things you care about that cost money.

I looked up Larkin cribs, etc. They are mid-range; you can get what she bought at Pottery Barn. Not over the top at all, given that you admit you could afford them.

OP here. Maybe I’m naive or cheap but I’ve looked at cribs online and most were half the cost of the Larkin crib.

It’s also annoying these items won’t be here for months and we paid nearly $800 in taxes and delivery charges.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My husband said “no” to the nursery furniture I had picked out. We had our first two babies during residency, and bought a crib and changing table off Amazon. When I got pregnant with our third was really excited to furnish the nursery in our new house with our new attending salaries. I had a crib, chair, and dresser/changing table picked out at an Amish furniture store that I loved. I had brought my mom and aunt to see it. I had started making some things for the walls and made little curtains. I went to show it to my husband before I actually bought it, and he said that it was too expensive for nursery furniture. He looked at it for less than a minute. I was managing our finances at the time and knew that we could afford it.

We fought over it. He eventually bought some more crap on Amazon. It had monkeys all over it.

I wish I had done what your wife did and just bought it without asking him. It would have had absolutely zero impact on our financial situation, and I would have really enjoyed it for hours every day for years.

OMG. I wish you had just bought what you wanted. Check this in the future.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:How much over?

Technically if each individual piece was within the limit, she did nothing wrong.

OP here. It was $6600. Most of the items were exceeding the $500. I’m just annoyed she did not let me know about a purchase this large.

I’d be super pissed for a lot of reasons. Money would be one. That’s a ridiculous amount. Second would be violation of our agreement. Third would be excluding me from participating in decorating the baby’s room.

OP here. This may sound bad but I don’t care about decorating the nursery. I will set it up but I could care less what the decor looks like. Same with our home. I let her pick it all because I don’t care about those things.

Well, she does. I'm sure there are things you care about that cost money.

I looked up Larkin cribs, etc. They are mid-range; you can get what she bought at Pottery Barn. Not over the top at all, given that you admit you could afford them.

OP here. Maybe I’m naive or cheap but I’ve looked at cribs online and most were half the cost of the Larkin crib.

It’s also annoying these items won’t be here for months and we paid nearly $800 in taxes and delivery charges.

I’m a woman and I’d be upset. Especially since you had the rule about checking in with each other. I think people are reacting poorly because you used the word authorization. That said, it’s typical to go a little cuckoo with a first baby. I was frugal but definitely crazy about other things. So hopefully you can move past this as a one-time thing.

[Anonymous]

I actually don’t think this is excessive for a room of quality furniture. Better than spending 2k on crap. I used a quality crib for two kids. My guess is nursery furniture was 3800-4000 13 years ago. It was used for 7 years.

I did not buy expensive high chairs or strollers: I did sell the ones I bought eventually.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’d just buy $6600 worth of power tools or something semi-useful that she’d never use.

I guarantee you that he has lost over $6600 in stocks because he thought he had some secret knowledge and was too smart to put his money in an index fund.
I’m also willing to bet that his wife doesn’t know about it.

OP here. I’ve never invested in stocks.

You should probably consider investing your 401k.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:How much over?

Technically if each individual piece was within the limit, she did nothing wrong.

OP here. It was $6600. Most of the items were exceeding the $500. I’m just annoyed she did not let me know about a purchase this large.

I’d be super pissed for a lot of reasons. Money would be one. That’s a ridiculous amount. Second would be violation of our agreement. Third would be excluding me from participating in decorating the baby’s room.

OP here. This may sound bad but I don’t care about decorating the nursery. I will set it up but I could care less what the decor looks like. Same with our home. I let her pick it all because I don’t care about those things.

Well, she does. I'm sure there are things you care about that cost money.

I looked up Larkin cribs, etc. They are mid-range; you can get what she bought at Pottery Barn. Not over the top at all, given that you admit you could afford them.

OP here. Maybe I’m naive or cheap but I’ve looked at cribs online and most were half the cost of the Larkin crib.

It’s also annoying these items won’t be here for months and we paid nearly $800 in taxes and delivery charges.

That is pottery barn. What people should do is get a credit card to get the points because then if you buy future furniture, you don’t feel as bad paying that delivery charge because it’s basically covered by points.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What do you mean when you say that you can afford it? Is it like, this is a good chunk of our savings over the last couple of years, but we can afford it? Or is it like, if I pick up some extra work over the next couple of weeks, that will pretty much cover the cost?

OP here. We can afford it meaning that it is expandable income. All of our accounts are covered and this money is pretty much to do with however we please. We often end up putting it into savings. Our annual HHI is 275k. Not rich but we earn enough to be comfortable.

You can afford the furniture. You are in for a rude awakening when you realize how much kids actually cost. This is really not something to get upset over.

[Anonymous]

This is a troll and advertising for Larkin.

I spend much more on nursery for my kids.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This is a troll and advertising for Larkin.

I spend much more on nursery for my kids.

Also I will add that I got new furniture for all my kids. No hand-me-down furniture for them.

And the quality of Pottery Barn has really gone downhill.