Why is the OW less attractive?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:They’re not; this is a myth that betrayed wives cling to in order to comfort themselves.

We've seen these women. They are less than in every way.

Except that they're banging your husband. So not less than in every way....

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Often times they just want variety or something new

There are plenty of ways to add variety or something new to ones sex life without it having to be a different partner. It takes a little effort and boundary pushing but it can make a big difference.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:In my case it was these factors:

She came on strong to him at work and although he resisted for awhile eventually he gave in.

She shared his desires to drink and occasionally get high which I totally didn't although I didn't give him crap about it either.

I think he actually preferred someone who was kind of slutty which I was not.

It wasn't that she was more willing to have sex, we had sex at least 4-5 times a week, I was always willing and thought we had a great sex life.

She was definitely less attractive, I wish I could show you a picture, but at this point I'm like, whatever, who can explain these things.

It is nuts to me that someone having this much sex needed more sex. I’m sorry op. Sounds like a ridic level of need for sex beyond any normal human (not you)

Maybe the 4-5 times per week sex was boring and the "slutty" sex was exciting and satisfying.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Because the ugly woman will go to great lengths to make him feel validated.

It is this.

Also have to point out the other woman is typically younger but butt ugly.

LOL this is delusional.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Because the ugly woman will go to great lengths to make him feel validated.

It is this.

Also have to point out the other woman is typically younger but butt ugly.

LOL this is delusional.

Lots of projection by cheating on old women

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Because sex isn’t 100% about how attractive a woman’s face is and it certainly isn’t about her accomplishments or pedigree.

I’m an OW and less attractive than the DW. I am 20 or so years younger. I’d say we have similar pedigrees and accomplishments.

My own DH has had OW who are objectively more attractive than me. All were less accomplished and no pedigree whatsoever.

lol why are you even married???

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Ladies, get real! After 15 years of marriage many of you park your husbands in the friend zone or worse as your priorities are your kids, book clubs, social media, what’s new at lululemon and pumpkin spice latte at Starbucks. Eventually, your husband will look for companionship and sex elsewhere even if she isn’t as attractive as you believe you are.

After 15 years of marriage husbands are not the fantastic prize you imagine. They are just as annoying and and whiny as their wives. Their wives are washing their dirty underwear and listening to them fart and belch, making their meals and putting up with their dirty dishes, etc. Those husbands don’t want companionship, they want an uncomplicated sex partner they don’t have to do a single thing for besides show up.

Yep. And the woman—with a career of her own AND doing most of the child rearing herself is effing exhausted.

I’m sure this is true in many cases but not always. I do most of the housework and half of the kid work and yet DW has made it clear that after job and kids and her friends there isn’t enough time, energy, or interest left over for me. Next time a woman flirts with me I won’t brush her off so quickly.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Ladies, get real! After 15 years of marriage many of you park your husbands in the friend zone or worse as your priorities are your kids, book clubs, social media, what’s new at lululemon and pumpkin spice latte at Starbucks. Eventually, your husband will look for companionship and sex elsewhere even if she isn’t as attractive as you believe you are.

After 15 years of marriage husbands are not the fantastic prize you imagine. They are just as annoying and and whiny as their wives. Their wives are washing their dirty underwear and listening to them fart and belch, making their meals and putting up with their dirty dishes, etc. Those husbands don’t want companionship, they want an uncomplicated sex partner they don’t have to do a single thing for besides show up.

Yep. And the woman—with a career of her own AND doing most of the child rearing herself is effing exhausted.

I’m sure this is true in many cases but not always. I do most of the housework and half of the kid work and yet DW has made it clear that after job and kids and her friends there isn’t enough time, energy, or interest left over for me. Next time a woman flirts with me I won’t brush her off so quickly.

When our kids were young and we were both working we never did boys or girls night out nor did we have any time consuming hobbies that ate into our limited free time. OK, we may have been boring but we always had time for each other once our three kids were in bed. We almost always went to bed at the same time and that simple act definitely encouraged a good sex life. Even many years later it still works.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:They have their cake and eat it too. Statistics show the vast majority of cheating men do say they’d marriages are happy to very happy. Midlife they get some uggo action to feel young again and treat their untreated depression. A married man will literally say anything to the ow to get free sex and have her keep her mouth shut.

+1

She can be uggo, but he would never say "wow this is the worst sex with the ugliest betch ever!" because having anything (anything) on the side boosts his midlife crisis ego.

I know. Any ow no matter how awful or ugly or loserish is told the exact same thing: you are the best. I never had sex like that …blah, blah, blah only a f@“king idiot doesn’t see it for what it is.

It’s why they aren’t running off into the sunset together. Lol

Many of those men feel marriage is a trap. They aren’t staying with their wives because she’s more beautiful or more educated than the OW. They are unwilling to go through a divorce because they think the courts will be unfair to them. If they do the divorce, they don’t decline to marry the OW because they think she’s fatter or uglier or stupider than the XW. They don’t want to marry anyone again.

Oh yeah- the “I’d love to marry you, babe, but I can’t leave my kids. It will cost me too much $$…blah blah blah…but you are the best thing that ever happened to me” lol. See you are still buying the BS.

Those that actually leave may feel more but the vast majority are using you to feed they’d broken midlife middle aged egos.

And anyone that participates in something like that -knowing he has a wife and kids -is not only an idiot but also a complete slime-ball who severely lacks empathy. Jerry Springer material.

I think all of you guys comment on this post somehow think that the OW is always single and always hopes he’ll leave his wife. This is usually not the case. It’s a mutually beneficial relationship in which two people have clearly defined expectations and both parties are getting what they want.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:They’re not; this is a myth that betrayed wives cling to in order to comfort themselves.

We've seen these women. They are less than in every way.

Except that they're banging your husband. So not less than in every way....

So prostitutes are the same.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:They have their cake and eat it too. Statistics show the vast majority of cheating men do say they’d marriages are happy to very happy. Midlife they get some uggo action to feel young again and treat their untreated depression. A married man will literally say anything to the ow to get free sex and have her keep her mouth shut.

+1

She can be uggo, but he would never say "wow this is the worst sex with the ugliest betch ever!" because having anything (anything) on the side boosts his midlife crisis ego.

I know. Any ow no matter how awful or ugly or loserish is told the exact same thing: you are the best. I never had sex like that …blah, blah, blah only a f@“king idiot doesn’t see it for what it is.

It’s why they aren’t running off into the sunset together. Lol

Many of those men feel marriage is a trap. They aren’t staying with their wives because she’s more beautiful or more educated than the OW. They are unwilling to go through a divorce because they think the courts will be unfair to them. If they do the divorce, they don’t decline to marry the OW because they think she’s fatter or uglier or stupider than the XW. They don’t want to marry anyone again.

Oh yeah- the “I’d love to marry you, babe, but I can’t leave my kids. It will cost me too much $$…blah blah blah…but you are the best thing that ever happened to me” lol. See you are still buying the BS.

Those that actually leave may feel more but the vast majority are using you to feed they’d broken midlife middle aged egos.

And anyone that participates in something like that -knowing he has a wife and kids -is not only an idiot but also a complete slime-ball who severely lacks empathy. Jerry Springer material.

I think all of you guys comment on this post somehow think that the OW is always single and always hopes he’ll leave his wife. This is usually not the case. It’s a mutually beneficial relationship in which two people have clearly defined expectations and both parties are getting what they want.

It’s 2 severely damaged people feeding each others addictions.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Ladies, get real! After 15 years of marriage many of you park your husbands in the friend zone or worse as your priorities are your kids, book clubs, social media, what’s new at lululemon and pumpkin spice latte at Starbucks. Eventually, your husband will look for companionship and sex elsewhere even if she isn’t as attractive as you believe you are.

After 15 years of marriage husbands are not the fantastic prize you imagine. They are just as annoying and and whiny as their wives. Their wives are washing their dirty underwear and listening to them fart and belch, making their meals and putting up with their dirty dishes, etc. Those husbands don’t want companionship, they want an uncomplicated sex partner they don’t have to do a single thing for besides show up.

Yep. And the woman—with a career of her own AND doing most of the child rearing herself is effing exhausted.

I’m sure this is true in many cases but not always. I do most of the housework and half of the kid work and yet DW has made it clear that after job and kids and her friends there isn’t enough time, energy, or interest left over for me. Next time a woman flirts with me I won’t brush her off so quickly.

When our kids were young and we were both working we never did boys or girls night out nor did we have any time consuming hobbies that ate into our limited free time. OK, we may have been boring but we always had time for each other once our three kids were in bed. We almost always went to bed at the same time and that simple act definitely encouraged a good sex life. Even many years later it still works.

I don’t think I could be a good partner if I didn’t have my own interests and friends. But my marriage is my #1 interest, and my husband is my “home base.” Even if we don’t have a lot of time or are having a lot of sex we are each other’s most important person. It’s a matter of priorities, and the marriage has to come first.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:They have their cake and eat it too. Statistics show the vast majority of cheating men do say they’d marriages are happy to very happy. Midlife they get some uggo action to feel young again and treat their untreated depression. A married man will literally say anything to the ow to get free sex and have her keep her mouth shut.

+1

She can be uggo, but he would never say "wow this is the worst sex with the ugliest betch ever!" because having anything (anything) on the side boosts his midlife crisis ego.

I know. Any ow no matter how awful or ugly or loserish is told the exact same thing: you are the best. I never had sex like that …blah, blah, blah only a f@“king idiot doesn’t see it for what it is.

It’s why they aren’t running off into the sunset together. Lol

Many of those men feel marriage is a trap. They aren’t staying with their wives because she’s more beautiful or more educated than the OW. They are unwilling to go through a divorce because they think the courts will be unfair to them. If they do the divorce, they don’t decline to marry the OW because they think she’s fatter or uglier or stupider than the XW. They don’t want to marry anyone again.

Oh yeah- the “I’d love to marry you, babe, but I can’t leave my kids. It will cost me too much $$…blah blah blah…but you are the best thing that ever happened to me” lol. See you are still buying the BS.

Those that actually leave may feel more but the vast majority are using you to feed they’d broken midlife middle aged egos.

And anyone that participates in something like that -knowing he has a wife and kids -is not only an idiot but also a complete slime-ball who severely lacks empathy. Jerry Springer material.

I think all of you guys comment on this post somehow think that the OW is always single and always hopes he’ll leave his wife. This is usually not the case. It’s a mutually beneficial relationship in which two people have clearly defined expectations and both parties are getting what they want.

Also they're describing their own DH -- he's also in the group of "anyone who participates in something like that -- knowing he has a wife and kids" while also being THE ONE THEY'RE MARRIED TO. Yuck. Your DH is a slimeball who lacks maturity and is Jerry Springer material. There, corrected it for ya.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:They have their cake and eat it too. Statistics show the vast majority of cheating men do say they’d marriages are happy to very happy. Midlife they get some uggo action to feel young again and treat their untreated depression. A married man will literally say anything to the ow to get free sex and have her keep her mouth shut.

+1

She can be uggo, but he would never say "wow this is the worst sex with the ugliest betch ever!" because having anything (anything) on the side boosts his midlife crisis ego.

I know. Any ow no matter how awful or ugly or loserish is told the exact same thing: you are the best. I never had sex like that …blah, blah, blah only a f@“king idiot doesn’t see it for what it is.

It’s why they aren’t running off into the sunset together. Lol

Many of those men feel marriage is a trap. They aren’t staying with their wives because she’s more beautiful or more educated than the OW. They are unwilling to go through a divorce because they think the courts will be unfair to them. If they do the divorce, they don’t decline to marry the OW because they think she’s fatter or uglier or stupider than the XW. They don’t want to marry anyone again.

Oh yeah- the “I’d love to marry you, babe, but I can’t leave my kids. It will cost me too much $$…blah blah blah…but you are the best thing that ever happened to me” lol. See you are still buying the BS.

Those that actually leave may feel more but the vast majority are using you to feed they’d broken midlife middle aged egos.

And anyone that participates in something like that -knowing he has a wife and kids -is not only an idiot but also a complete slime-ball who severely lacks empathy. Jerry Springer material.

I think all of you guys comment on this post somehow think that the OW is always single and always hopes he’ll leave his wife. This is usually not the case. It’s a mutually beneficial relationship in which two people have clearly defined expectations and both parties are getting what they want.

It’s 2 severely damaged people feeding each others addictions.

Sure. I’m saying it’s not always some pathetic woman pining for a man she can’t have. Usually, he can’t have her either and she also doesn’t want to leave her family. “Severe” might be a bit much because you’d be surprised how many people cheat. It’s awful but it is a normal and common part of human relationships.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Often times they just want variety or something new

There are plenty of ways to add variety or something new to ones sex life without it having to be a different partner. It takes a little effort and boundary pushing but it can make a big difference.

And a lot of women don’t bother. See the “my GF won’t reciprocate” thread lol. I’m middle aged and divorced dating same and I’m surprised how low the bar is for being considered good in bed as a woman. I wonder if some of the shocked wives who talk about frequency with their DHs are available but not particularly responsive.