DD hates her moles and freckles on face
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Anonymous
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She has gotten more increasingly over the last few years. She is now 11 and has probably 15 prominent moles and freckles on her face. Luckily she wears a mask at school which has helped cover a lot of them. I’m worried about how upset she is about them, she comments and complains about them daily.
I have explain they’re not dangerous and she does not need to get them removed but she wants to get them removed for cosmetic reasons. I told her the earliest we could do that is her teenage years. I don’t know how to make her feel better about this, more confident, this is such a tough age anyway and then to not like how your face looks it’s just heartbreaking. I do not have any moles on my face so it’s very hard for her to understand why she has them. Any advice from people in the situation? I feel totally helpless. |
Anonymous
| Some people think they are absolutely beautiful. I don't love my freckles (I was a sun princess as a youngster and wish I'd been more careful). But my husband adores them. Can you find a picture of a beautiful celeb/actress with freckles? |
Anonymous
Oh I have! And she just points out how much bigger/darker/more noticeable her moles are. She has a much bigger issue with the moles than the freckles. -OP |
Anonymous
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Oh that's so sad!
First of all, social media can exacerbate this. But she's only 11 so I'm assuming she isnt' getting that. Second, I agree with PP that seeing pictures of beautiful people with freckles and moles will help a lot. That is a way a lot of people with many physical "imperfections" like bigger noses can feel better about themselves. I think it would be helpful to sit down with her and show some of those pictures. She probably won't be receptive right away but it will plant a seed. Third, keep reminding her that it's what's on the inside that counts. |
Anonymous
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Don't have anything removed now. She should know if she is prone to keloid scars first and should be a little older. Take her to a derm to get them checked out to get a baseline as a teaching point about how to care for this skin type. At the derm, talk about the importance of SPF for both long term cancer and aging/keeping unwanted pigment at bay. Get some Elta Clear and teach her to use it daily.
With a good relationship with a derm (heath and aesthetic) she can keep her skin healthy and when it's age appropriate (not now) consider removal of the moles. "Morally" its no different than dying your hair or braces etc. She should be a little older, but she should also learn how to care for this skin type. Also, as my mother told me at this age, a face without freckles is like a night without stars. (though I wish she had also pushed the daily sunscreen as I treck to the derm for IPL and peels!) |
Anonymous
| Chris Chang is a plastic surgeon who worked for 10 or so years first as a pediatric facial plastic surgeon. He is amazing and could remove the moles with next to no scarring. |
Anonymous
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I have the same and I've always hated them. I wish I'd had them removed younger so it wouldn't be so obvious to everyone I've known for 40 years I'd had it done. I say get them removed in a couple of years if she still wants to.
I'd do it over Christmas break because she will NOT want to be outside as they heal. Summer = tan = greater scarring and spotting chance. |
Anonymous
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I had moles removed from my face and you can not tell at all. I'm very happy I did. It has made a world of difference.
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Anonymous
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I was the same but my moles faded a lot as I've aged. They're much less noticeable now. I have grown to like them.
All that said, if the moles are huge and you think there is a case for removal, you might want to consult a plastic surgeon soon. My brother had some very large moles that needed removal (they were risks for cancer) and the surgeon said they would scar less if removed before puberty. It was a pretty rough surgery though. |
Anonymous
| My DD had an unsightly mole on her upper lip area. Oh how I agonized over whether to remove it. Finally went to a plastic surgeon when she was 10, had it done and never looked back. The scar, a lighter spot, is not noticeable and her skin is slightly olive. One of my better parenting decisions. |
Anonymous
| ^^ I wanted to do it before she became all attached to them. My roommate in college had these ugly moles but she loved them and thought they gave her “character”. No they were just ugly moles. But to each their own. |
Anonymous
| Why are you waiting for teenage years? I had one on my chin and was teased for being a "witch." Removing it was literally lifesaving. Doing it when she is young creates less of a scar as her skin is still so pliable. Go to a plastic surgeon. |
Anonymous
This seems like a a really valid case of getting them removed. I’m sorry but listen to your DD and get her some relief. |
Anonymous
| We first tried a dermatologist but appointments are hard to get and the female doctor was all about “when you grow up you can decide …” More scarring. My DD is 25 now and doesn’t even remember she had that large mole near her lip. Excellent plastic surgeon. She’s a very attractive young woman. |
Anonymous
| Surface type mole removal is super easy. If the moles are raised, then it may scar a little. My skin is prone to moles so I got them all removed when I was 19 or 20 (wish I did it earlier). And then every few years I’ll remove the new ones that appear or the old ones that grow back. I get this done in another country so no recommendations on who to go to here. |