Am I overreacting

[Anonymous]

my mother died in September. For a holiday gift to her siblings (including my DH), my SIL blew up and framed a "family" sibling photo of them posing with their own mother--AT MY MOM'S FUNERAL, posed in the garden at the service. I got to sit and listen hiding tears in my eyes while they oohed and ahhed over what a great family photo it was. I'm so upset. With their mom as the centerpiece. Who is still alive.
DH thinks it was unintentional obviously, but I feel like my mom's death was a photo op.

[Anonymous]

They probably feel extra grateful for the opportunity to be together. I’m sorry for your loss.

[Anonymous]

I agree with your DH. I’m sorry for your loss. It’s a hard one.

[Anonymous]

Yikes. So unaware and declasse.

I'm sorry for your loss, OP.

This is why photos should never been taken at funerals. Ugh.

[Anonymous]

I am so sorry. The first Christmas without your mother must have been so hard.

I’m sure this wasn’t intentional and they would feel terrible if they knew how hurt you were. I remember as a kid my relatives taking photos at funerals and wakes because it was one of the few times the family was together and dressed in nice clothes. It was odd to me as a kid since we were there at a funeral for someone in our family.

I know that doesn’t make it any easier for you. I really am sorry.

[Anonymous]

My family always takes family pics at funerals and our family does not consider it disrespectful. Maybe this is a norm for their family to which you are not accustomed. I'm sorry for your loss.

[Anonymous]

So terribly insensitive. I totally understand where you’re coming from OP.

[Anonymous]

I’m sorry you are upset, OP. I’m sure your grief is still fresh. One of the few things about a funeral I’d that it provides opportunities for family reunions, of a sort. My mom had a photo of her siblings at their mom’s funerals and it’s special to them.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I’m sorry you are upset, OP. I’m sure your grief is still fresh. One of the few things about a funeral I’d that it provides opportunities for family reunions, of a sort. My mom had a photo of her siblings at their mom’s funerals and it’s special to them.

In this case, it was someone else's mother.

[Anonymous]

I'm sorry. Grief is a terrible and unpredictable thing. You may be surprised what knocks you to your knees over the next year or so. It is something she could not possibly comprehend until she finds herself in your shoes.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:So terribly insensitive. I totally understand where you’re coming from OP.

Yes, ouch. I’d be hurt. I would probably not say anything because it’s not like it’s a situation that’s going to come up again but it would hurt.

[Anonymous]

Tacky and insensitive. Is your SIL generally a thoughtless person or is this a one-off?

[Anonymous]

Wow, that’s absurdly insensitive. Jeez.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Yikes. So unaware and declasse.

I'm sorry for your loss, OP.

This is why photos should never been taken at funerals. Ugh.

Super tacky of them! I’m sorry

[Anonymous]

It was very kind of them all to come to the service. Not all inlaws are that considerate.

Ask your husband to store his photo away in a closet. a
And try to forget about it. If it were me, I would only say something to the inlaws if they asked why you aren't displaying the photo. I'd start with explaining that the photo only reminds you of your mother's death. If they push back or act defensive, "Well Jane, what did you expect? I associate that day with mourning, not a happy family photo op."