FTM seeking advice on hiring a nanny

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Just hire someone over age 40, their face won't be as glued to their smartphone then.

Best advice. These young girls are truly ridiculous.

Agree, a mature professional nanny knows the different between using the cell phone to quickly plan a playdate, check the weather, or send a photo VERSUS gabbing for 15-30++ minutes while caring for a child, at the park, or browsing the web on her phone. If appointments or personal plans need to be made during "office hours" do so during the 1-3 hours of naptimes. Nothing is more telling than your toddler walking around the house with a phone or remote babbling away since she saw her nanny doing it all day.

Same as in any profession, don't use your personal phone for more than a couple minutes of social or personal use while on the clock.

BTW, one can go to ANY park or library in the DC area and tell immediately what nannies are engaged with their children and which ones are playing about on their personal cell phones. The age pattern is readily visible.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Just hire someone over age 40, their face won't be as glued to their smartphone then.

Best advice. These young girls are truly ridiculous.

Agree, a mature professional nanny knows the different between using the cell phone to quickly plan a playdate, check the weather, or send a photo VERSUS gabbing for 15-30++ minutes while caring for a child, at the park, or browsing the web on her phone. If appointments or personal plans need to be made during "office hours" do so during the 1-3 hours of naptimes. Nothing is more telling than your toddler walking around the house with a phone or remote babbling away since she saw her nanny doing it all day.

Same as in any profession, don't use your personal phone for more than a couple minutes of social or personal use while on the clock.

BTW, one can go to ANY park or library in the DC area and tell immediately what nannies are engaged with their children and which ones are playing about on their personal cell phones. The age pattern is readily visible.

I'm in Chicago and it's the exact opposite here. The younger (late 20's early 30's) nannies are the ones engaging with all of the children at the park/library/gymboree, not just their own charges, while the older nannies (usually women of color, not a judgment, just a fact) and the SAHM's are on their phones or talking with their friends while ignoring their kids. As in any situation, their are outliers on all sides, but in my 10+ years of observation, this is what I have noticed.

[Anonymous]

Hmmmm, interesting topic.

Ok, bit of background: live-in nanny, 30.

One 24/7 job: nope, food was part of the job. I'm responsible for helping your kids learn what foods taste good to them, what is nutritious, what vegetables need to be cooked for all the nutrients to be available and which should be eaten raw. I model good eating habits, table manners and help a child learn that food is a form of communication. If you have an infant, sure, I can provide my own food. If your child is eating solids (not pureed baby food), nope, I'm eating with the child. Cell phone use during my off time, well, that's hard to find. I worked 24/7, from 7am to 10 pm kids were up, but my day started before that and ended after. I got the 3 year old up at 10pm and 12-1am to potty, kids crawled in bed with me due to nightmares or not sleeping, kids were sick at night, etc. I call my grandmother once a day, should I not be allowed to do so for 5+ days because my employer is gone? No, I don't have long conversations while kids are awake and aware. Yes, I do take pictures of kids to send to parents, I schedule appointments for myself AND them while the office is open, and I respond to other parents' calls and texts during reasonable hours (ie. before 8pm). When you work with children that don't nap, that don't go to school, you don't have any other options. Interesting note: no landline, so my employer provided the cell phone and I purchased it from him when the position ended.

Two other positions involved "breaks" while the children were in school, but I was a household manager, not just a nanny, so that time wasn't mine either, I was doing housework. When would you like me to schedule your son's playdate? Oh, school is calling because your daughter is sick, well, they know to call you and you'll call me, right?

I'm fully in favor of not using the phone for inordinate amounts of time when attention should be on the child. But reasonable people set reasonable limits for myself. Personally, I thought it was amusing every time my employer called while I was driving and one of the older children answered with "Miss ... is driving, she can't talk to you now, can I take a message? Wait, I need to find a pen and paper, who has the pens again? Someone hid the paper!" He didn't see an issue with it, he knew what my priorities are for children's safety, but he would consistently ask to talk to me anyway.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:



Two other positions involved "breaks" while the children were in school, but I was a household manager, not just a nanny, so that time wasn't mine either, I was doing housework. When would you like me to schedule your son's playdate? Oh, school is calling because your daughter is sick, well, they know to call you and you'll call me, right?

Okay, I actually do like the school to call me, and I will call my nanny if I can't make it to pick up my child. I would not be happy to return home and find out that my child was sick or in trouble, and no one bothered to let me know.
I also like to be the one to schedule playdates and activities and let the nanny know when they are, not the other way around.