So angry.

[Anonymous]

Ugh, I'm so sorry. I was really hoping for a better outcome. Some day she'll look back on this and realize how poorly she handled the entire thing.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Ugh, I'm so sorry. I was really hoping for a better outcome. Some day she'll look back on this and realize how poorly she handled the entire thing.

No, she won't.

[Anonymous]

I hope she reads DCUM!

[Anonymous]

Where is the father in all of this?

[Anonymous]

OP, I am glad this happened. You see her true colors now and what she is capable of. You must get out of this situation before she blames you for something much more serious.

I am an MB and I truly loathe how your employers behaving toward you but you see who she is now. To say she does not deserve you is an understatement. I honestly think you should give your notice now - before she can fire you. Tell her you feel you and she are at an impasse and it would be better for both everyone if you parted ways. Thank her for the experience and tell her how much you love her children. Please start looking for another position now - I mean, right now!

I know you love the children. Hopefully things will settle down so you can still see them.

I am truly sorry you have had to go thru this. I have never seen any situation posted on this website in 15 years where everyone agreed with the nanny! You were in the right.

[Anonymous]

Please give your notice, OP. Your employer is horrible. You did nothing wrong and nothing to deserve this treatment.

[Anonymous]

this isn't a situation where you give two weeks notice-you guys just had a huge disagreement and it was clearly emotional on both sides. you should cash your check and hand in a letter of resignation on friday. those two weeks would be unbearable for everyone involved. imagine what you'd be blamed for, and the stress level.

[Anonymous]

Tell her tomorrow that it's going to be your last day. She's completely unreasonable and you don't owe her notice. You took the time to try to calm down and approach her directly and constructively and she blew up at you again for a problem that she caused. She deserves to be inconvenienced looking for another reliable nanny for 2 SN toddlers.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What happened, OP?

Anonymous wrote:What happened, OP?

Short version, it didn’t go well and I’m either going to quit or be fired by the end of the week.

Long version. I e-mailed her Tuesday night and when I came in Wednesday she said she got me e-mail but was exhausted and didn’t get a chance to read it. Day went fine, at about 3pm she texts and tells me not to the boys out and she’ll be home early to talk. She came home at her regular time and was obviously not happy. She told me she had wanted to drop last week because it was stressful and traumatic. I apologized but said I felt like we needed to talk about what happened. She got visibly frustrated and I have my spiel, she stopped me half way and basically told me I should have let it go because now she’s “questioning my abilities to properly handle this position”. I was kind of shocked and froze up. I expected a better conversation and was met with a lot of anger and I have a really hard time defending/expressing myself when the other person seems less than receptive.

She got pretty heated and basically said that last Tuesday was the worst day of her life and now I’m trying to put the blame on her and her family. She said I don’t understand because I’m not a parent, and that it was selfish of me to be more concerned about myself than her sons. I tried to explain where the confusion lies, and how I wanted to avoid situations like this in the future. She accused of me of trying to shift responsibility off myself. She said she doubted my abilities because instead of taking responsibility I’m trying to blame others. She told me I was, “playing dumb” and lacked common sense because I obviously should have known I needed to go with her family if they ever took the boys outside. She meant take a back seat in the house, but during outings I needed to be present and in charge. She NEVER told me this.... ever. She said numerous times to take a back seat. She never distinguished when and when not to take action. I really didn’t get a chance to explain myself. I left in tears.

I’m heartbroken because I truly love these boys and hate to think this is how it’s going to end.

Also, I’m concerned because this is so out of character for Mb. She’s always been professional, fairly kind (not ever personable, but kind), and reasonable.

I’m wondering if something is going on...

So, that’s it. Bad ending. I’m working today but MB was very cold this morning. I’m not suppose to take them out at all today which is abnormal.

Nope. Not Okay. This is when you should have tole her if that is how she felt you could no longer work for her effective immediately.
You o not let anyone isrepect you or discredit the work you do.
You cannot use the boys as a reason for you to stay and be abused.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Where is the father in all of this?

No father. Well, the father is an anonymous donor.

MB is a single mom by choice.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Where is the father in all of this?

No father. Well, the father is an anonymous donor.

MB is a single mom by choice.

I feel for her - a single mother with autistic twin boys - but she, as another poster wrote, showed you exactly who she was this week and you cannot accept being treated like that.

Please, OP, give her your notice. I would not simply quit as others have suggested - give two weeks (or whatever your contract states) and prepare your charges for your leaving.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Where is the father in all of this?

No father. Well, the father is an anonymous donor.

MB is a single mom by choice.

So she is a fool on top of everything else - she is going to treat a devoted nanny like crap when she has no backup for two autistic toddlers?! Holy hell - what an idiot!!!

[Anonymous]

Please quit, OP. The MB was dead wrong in the incident and dead wrong in her reaction to your email. Please, please, please quit today.

[Anonymous]

How is it going today, OP?

Please know that I (and others) will stand behind you no matter what you decide. You were so clearly in the right in this situation that you've made a lot of new "friends" on this forum!

[Anonymous]

OP- I'm sorry, your MB stinks.
It's easier to look for a new job when you have one, so:
Start looking for a job today. Take days off to interview if you need. And then quit. Not necessary to give 2 weeks.
Her family can come in to help out
-MB who thinks your MB is a jerk.