Red flag? Overthinking? Interviewed nanny. Refused to follow house rules.

[Anonymous]

Hmmm, my nanny voluntarily removed her shoes at the interview when she saw the stack next to the door (and our bare feet). We don't make anyone do so (and would expect repairmen, plumbers, etc. who need closed toed shoes for safety to keep them on) but most houseguests take them off without even being asked, and I would have never guessed there were people who would object so strenuously. But I totally get that when you are used to doing things one way all the time, it can be very weird and uncomfortable to be asked to do otherwise, and a house owner should try not to impose such a burden on the visitor.

For me, there is also the flip side though: our floors are cleaned professionally every 2 weeks, and the dining area where there may be crumbs is vacuumed/Swiffered at least daily. We have little ones who still crawl around or lie down on the floor while playing, so we try to keep the floors clean enough that we feel comfortable with them doing so. If a guest comes in wearing sneakers that have been on the sidewalk, in mud, grass, etc. and tracks them around the house, that is going to make the floors much, much dirtier, possibly to the point where we will not be able to be comfortable in our house until we clean the entire floor. That also seems like a rather big burden for the visitor to impose on the house owner.

I would maybe chalk it up to a yellow flag, OP, since she did offer a plan to do so going forward. Maybe similar to a nanny who comes to the interview wearing a nice skirt because she wants to look professional, and not realizing she would be meeting the kids who want to play or run with her in a way that's not easy to do in a skirt. Like... a little weird you wouldn't be prepared for that, but people have different life experiences, and we have to be a bit flexible to get along. Just have a long-ish trial period and if there are any other warning flags, find a different person who is more compatible. Getting her house slippers are a good idea.

(And in case it needs to be said, you absolutely have a right to be comfortable in your home, and that means a no-shoes policy if you want! I actually feel really weird walking around in other people's houses in shoes, but have to accept that it would be really weird for me to take them off if no one else does.)

[Anonymous]

Both nanny and I must wear shoes with arch or orthotic support at all times or develop painful foot conditions. The solution is to have a clean indoor pair of slippers or shoes to wear when in your house.

[Anonymous]

I would pass on her. I have a no show house and have recently done several in person interviews. No one objected to removing their shoes. They just did it automatically

My concern is that you aren't a great fit. If removing shoes is important to you and she wouldn't, then I question what other values might she object to. How accommodating will she be at doing things your way?

[Anonymous]

She has stinky feet or was wearing her cute but very stinky shoes. Otherwise, you’d be here saying that nanny is perfect in every way but her feet stank your house and you cannot imagine hiring someone who’ll be stinking up your house every day.

If she said she’ll wear socks in the future to abide by the rules, I’d consider it ok. But it’s your gut, so follow it.

[Anonymous]

I am neither troll nor any of PPs. This nanny has, how to better describe it, no culture. She just does not think it is a big deal, in her world it is not. She probably wears outside shoes in her home. Most people who wear shoes at home, like some PP said, have CLEAN, inside only shoes for that purpose, and they would have more respect than wear outside shoes to someone else's home with small children who drop things on the floor and then put them in their mouths. It has nothing to do with Covid, it just tells you about that person in general. She knew she was going inside, she should have thought one step ahead and put a pair of socks in the bag to don on her feet, or she could have asked you to use plastic bags on top of her shoes. If she could not find a simple solution to keep both of you happy, she is the wrong person for any nanny job, IMHO.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I am neither troll nor any of PPs. This nanny has, how to better describe it, no culture. She just does not think it is a big deal, in her world it is not. She probably wears outside shoes in her home. Most people who wear shoes at home, like some PP said, have CLEAN, inside only shoes for that purpose, and they would have more respect than wear outside shoes to someone else's home with small children who drop things on the floor and then put them in their mouths. It has nothing to do with Covid, it just tells you about that person in general. She knew she was going inside, she should have thought one step ahead and put a pair of socks in the bag to don on her feet, or she could have asked you to use plastic bags on top of her shoes. If she could not find a simple solution to keep both of you happy, she is the wrong person for any nanny job, IMHO.

Wow.

I go to interviews dressed professionally. Trial days are for seeing if the position will work, interviews are to discuss the nitty gritty *without children present*. No, I don't dress to take my shoes off during any interview, because my assumption is that the children will be elsewhere and the parent will be interviewing several people, not just me.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am neither troll nor any of PPs. This nanny has, how to better describe it, no culture. She just does not think it is a big deal, in her world it is not. She probably wears outside shoes in her home. Most people who wear shoes at home, like some PP said, have CLEAN, inside only shoes for that purpose, and they would have more respect than wear outside shoes to someone else's home with small children who drop things on the floor and then put them in their mouths. It has nothing to do with Covid, it just tells you about that person in general. She knew she was going inside, she should have thought one step ahead and put a pair of socks in the bag to don on her feet, or she could have asked you to use plastic bags on top of her shoes. If she could not find a simple solution to keep both of you happy, she is the wrong person for any nanny job, IMHO.

Wow.

I go to interviews dressed professionally. Trial days are for seeing if the position will work, interviews are to discuss the nitty gritty *without children present*. No, I don't dress to take my shoes off during any interview, because my assumption is that the children will be elsewhere and the parent will be interviewing several people, not just me.

Don’t try to add logic. These are the same people that think $15/hr is great pay and getting them someone professional. These are the same people that think a nanny doesn’t deserve a break while the baby naps and should be working constantly.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I am neither troll nor any of PPs. This nanny has, how to better describe it, no culture. She just does not think it is a big deal, in her world it is not. She probably wears outside shoes in her home. Most people who wear shoes at home, like some PP said, have CLEAN, inside only shoes for that purpose, and they would have more respect than wear outside shoes to someone else's home with small children who drop things on the floor and then put them in their mouths. It has nothing to do with Covid, it just tells you about that person in general. She knew she was going inside, she should have thought one step ahead and put a pair of socks in the bag to don on her feet, or she could have asked you to use plastic bags on top of her shoes. If she could not find a simple solution to keep both of you happy, she is the wrong person for any nanny job, IMHO.

IMHO you are definitely a troll.

[Anonymous]

Get over it!
Think: she could have had warts on the bottom of her feet and didn’t want to spread it, her feet might have smelt, she has sensory issues, felt unsafe, etc.
it’s people like you that make nanny’s hate their jobs…

[Anonymous]

I love going barefoot everywhere but no way would I do it in someone else's house as that's just gross. You offer new slippers or shoe covers. We are a no shoes house but I don't expect anyone else to take off their shoes.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am neither troll nor any of PPs. This nanny has, how to better describe it, no culture. She just does not think it is a big deal, in her world it is not. She probably wears outside shoes in her home. Most people who wear shoes at home, like some PP said, have CLEAN, inside only shoes for that purpose, and they would have more respect than wear outside shoes to someone else's home with small children who drop things on the floor and then put them in their mouths. It has nothing to do with Covid, it just tells you about that person in general. She knew she was going inside, she should have thought one step ahead and put a pair of socks in the bag to don on her feet, or she could have asked you to use plastic bags on top of her shoes. If she could not find a simple solution to keep both of you happy, she is the wrong person for any nanny job, IMHO.

Wow.

I go to interviews dressed professionally. Trial days are for seeing if the position will work, interviews are to discuss the nitty gritty *without children present*. No, I don't dress to take my shoes off during any interview, because my assumption is that the children will be elsewhere and the parent will be interviewing several people, not just me.

This doesn't make sense its their home so even if children are in a different room during interview time they would be back after you leave! Perhaps PP only interviews at mansions with adult-only wings where no children shall ever set foot..

[Anonymous]

I would actually address it directly and how she handles that conversation will tell you a lot about what it will be like to work with her. I remember we had a nanny from Argentina and the only thing about her that made us crazy is that she never spoke to the kids during meals. When I finally asked her about her, she told me in surprise that her home country, meals were always eaten quietly or with the TV on. Sometimes what we interpret as malice is just misunderstanding of expectations.

[Anonymous]

Not sure if you’re reading this OP but I’m another mom boss and I have a huge ugly planter wart on my right foot. It’s gross and I worry about walking barefoot in other peoples homes because I don’t want them to see it or be infected. Maybe this was the case? And she didn’t plan ahead about it?

[Anonymous]

This is the funniest thread I’ve ever read.

Some of you parents have truly lost it.

[Anonymous]

I have flat feet. No way in hell do I expect people to remove their shoes. What if your boss asked you to go barefoot at the office? Carrying around children is hard on your joints.