Hiring a nanny who smokes

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What if your nanny lived with a smoker. My parents smoked all growing up and I lived with them for several years during college during which time I nannied. I wasn't a smoker, but I smelled like smoke because I couldn't afford to live on my own and pay for college. Don't assume your nanny smokes just because she smells like smoke.

Hmmm.... NO. I'm sorry but wash your clothes!!
No excuse to be smelling like an ashtray if you don't smoke lol

Unless you've lived with a smoker, how would you know?

I DO live with a smoker. My husband smokes and I do not smell like cigarettes. Neither do my clothes.
I don't see how or why you'd have to put up with living smelling like an ashtray if you are a non-smoker unless a) your parents smoke INSIDE the house (which shows the lack of respect they have for you) and b) you were too lazy to wash your clothes on the regular.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What if your nanny lived with a smoker. My parents smoked all growing up and I lived with them for several years during college during which time I nannied. I wasn't a smoker, but I smelled like smoke because I couldn't afford to live on my own and pay for college. Don't assume your nanny smokes just because she smells like smoke.

Hmmm.... NO. I'm sorry but wash your clothes!!
No excuse to be smelling like an ashtray if you don't smoke lol

Unless you've lived with a smoker, how would you know?

I DO live with a smoker. My husband smokes and I do not smell like cigarettes. Neither do my clothes.
I don't see how or why you'd have to put up with living smelling like an ashtray if you are a non-smoker unless a) your parents smoke INSIDE the house (which shows the lack of respect they have for you) and b) you were too lazy to wash your clothes on the regular.

I agree, that living with a smoker does not mean you smell like smoke.

I do have to say that I don't agree with people who say you must smell like smoke because you smoke. I smoked when I was a teenager and my parents did not know at all. Seriously, they would have killed me, very strict. I also have hung out with many people that never knew I smoked for the longest time because I didn't smoke around them. If I smelled so much like it, they would have noticed it. I think people with a very sensitive nose might notice it more, those that have severe allergies and can't be around any kind of scents, or if you are around those people that smoke A LOT during the day, smoke inside etc they will have a stronger smell on them. If you smoke one cigarette outside an hour or more before meeting up with someone (and wash your hands right after you smoke), then you might not smell like it.

[Anonymous]

I am not a smoker but when I was living with my Fiance in his parents house his mom smoked heavily in the house. Maybe up to a pack a day, all inside. My MB told me that maybe on one or two occasions I have come in smelling like smoke even though I never, ever smoke. I had told my MB when I was hired that I was a non-smoker and she believed me because she said that if I were a smoker that I probably would have smelled like smoke more often.

I also had a big bag of clothes that I was selling in consignment shops and on Ebay and somebody mentioned that my clothes smelled smokey. I hadn't noticed the smell, but then again I was used to living in a house where people smoked a lot so I was used to the smell.

I think that you can smell like smoke if you live in a house where other people smoke inside but it isn't likely for you to smell like smoke everyday.

[Anonymous]

That's just gross. People do this these days? Smoke inside the house?
The other day @grocery store I saw an old lady with a heavy winter wool coat and I have to tell you, the STENCH of cigarrette coming out of her.... Ughh forget smoking inside the house, that lady lived in a garbage can filled with cigarrette butts!


OP, smell or no smell I would not hire a smoker. Like someone said, if nanny has the ability to go all day without smoking (she promises not to smoke at work) and still smokes than bad judgement. If she can't go all day without smoking then she will hide a cigarrette here and there throughout the day and you will not be able to notice.

[Anonymous]

What I do on my time off is my business, not my employers.

[Anonymous]

Never. My father is a smoker, a long-time one, and every tissue in his body smells like smoke. When I use the bathroom in their place, I can tell when was the last time he used the toilet up to an hour. I can tell, walking into a room, when he was in this room last. It's horrible habit that infuses everything. I suppose if you're a kind of social smoker who has 2 cigarettes a week, I wouldn't even know, but then I doubt you'd call yourself a smoker to the point where it needs to be mentioned in an interview.

[Anonymous]

If I smelled smoke on a nanny I would be displeased. If I kept smelling smoke, I would fire.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Never. My father is a smoker, a long-time one, and every tissue in his body smells like smoke. When I use the bathroom in their place, I can tell when was the last time he used the toilet up to an hour. I can tell, walking into a room, when he was in this room last. It's horrible habit that infuses everything. I suppose if you're a kind of social smoker who has 2 cigarettes a week, I wouldn't even know, but then I doubt you'd call yourself a smoker to the point where it needs to be mentioned in an interview.

Agree with PP completely.

[Anonymous]

Searched for smoking and came up with this thread, hope ok to revisit!

I have known for a while that our live-in nanny is a smoker, as I borrowed her car and she had butts in it. She has not smoked in the house or around the kids.

She was out this afternoon and came home smelling strongly of smoke. Presumably she was smoking in her car. She will be driving my kids in it later.

Am I being paranoid to worry about a bit of second hand smoke in this situation? I am also worried my 6-year-old might figure out that she smokes ...

[Anonymous]

Never. Smokers smell very bad.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Searched for smoking and came up with this thread, hope ok to revisit!

I have known for a while that our live-in nanny is a smoker, as I borrowed her car and she had butts in it. She has not smoked in the house or around the kids.

She was out this afternoon and came home smelling strongly of smoke. Presumably she was smoking in her car. She will be driving my kids in it later.

Am I being paranoid to worry about a bit of second hand smoke in this situation? I am also worried my 6-year-old might figure out that she smokes ...

I wouldn't assume that she was smoking in her car - if she was at a friend's apartment and everyone was smoking she could reek just as badly - but I would absolutely find out! It is completely reasonable to be concerned about your kids exposure if they're riding in a car that is smoked in and they've probably already figured out that she does (at least I bet the 6yo has).

My guess is this is the beginning of the end for your relationship with this nanny and my only advice is if you decide to part ways, you ought to give her a generous notice or severance. If you've known she was a smoker, she let you borrow her car without hiding the evidence, the onus was on you to address it at that time. That it has now become a deal-breaker is not her fault. If she'd lied and snuck around my feelings would be quit the opposite, but as it stands it sounds you're the one who dropped the ball early on.

[Anonymous]

Smokers never believe they smell like smoke because they smoke outside, wash their clothes, change clothes, brush their teeth, etc..

They always smell like smoke (they may just not make you gag from it like people who don't do the above).

I would never hire a nanny who smokes, and would fire one if I discovered it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:No. Speaking as a former smoker, if she can avoid smoking after showering and before work so that she doesn't smell of smoke when she arrives and then not smoke for a full 8 - 10 hour day, she can quit and it shows bad judgment that she hasn't. And if she can't - well that is your answer right there. I guess you'd never know if she was an occasional smoker, but I wouldn't choose a smoker if I knew. The smoke stays in your clothes and hair and your car and everywhere - and the dangers of second hand smoke are real.

+1

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Smokers never believe they smell like smoke because they smoke outside, wash their clothes, change clothes, brush their teeth, etc..

They always smell like smoke (they may just not make you gag from it like people who don't do the above).

I would never hire a nanny who smokes, and would fire one if I discovered it.

Ha! I've smoked for 10 years, about two a day. About four people in my life are aware of that fact and they have witnessed it with their own eyes.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It's cigarettes here not drugs. Most girls wear perfume anyway. Does she have a nice car? If so, she probably doesn't smoke in it. I'd hire her on the condition she doesn't stink like a cigarette around my kids which is a pretty reasonable expectation. But, I know my kids will encounter smokers and (gasp!) cigarettes and some point in their life. No use in helicoptering.

Most people who smoke don't care enough about their clothes, car, or appearance to not let smoking ruin them. I would never hire a smoking nanny to care for my children no matter what she agrees too. If she has the will power to actually not smoke on the clock and keep her promise then she probably would have quit smoking by now.