MBs! Please weigh in. Thanks!

[Anonymous]

I'm a nanny posting and I would love to hear some honest MB feedback. My current position ends the first week of Aug. I've known this since day 1. Last month I started interviewing for fall positions, but wasn't having much luck finding a family I really clicked with. So last week I was contacted on care about a job but the MB wasn't sure when exactly she was going back to work. Well we met and she said she knew I was their perfect nanny and signed her job offer to start the end of May and hired me officially this past Sunday.
Yesterday I have notice (2weeks as agreed upon when I was hired here) and all seemed ok. This morning however MB tore into me as a person, that I am underhanded and screwed them over and how dare I not be transparent I was looking for a new job (even though my new MB called this current one for a reference and they talked). You can cut the tension in here with a saw.
So to the MBs out there on dcum, what are your two cents on a nanny agreeing to stay until the fall but leaving @3mos early because she was offered a job. Was I wrong? Should I have turned the new family down?
Fwiw, I've been with my current family almost 2yrs, and I am a single parent myself (DC does not come with) and the fear of no income factored heavily in accepting the job.
Thanks

[Anonymous]

MB here.

It's never appropriate to yell at anyone, and it was extremely unprofessional and just plain wrong for her to treat you that way.

That being said, while I think in the end you need to look out for your own interests, taking a job that much earlier than your end date wasn't the kindest way to treat your boss. I'm assuming there were no other issues, of course. If, as the new boss, I knew you were doing this, I wouldn't have hired you, as id be concerned you'd do the same to me.

So, IMO, wrong on both sides... Edge to mb for worse behavior.

[Anonymous]

OP here. My current MB poached me from another family, and brought that up as well. How underhanded I am.
The thing is I WAS looking only for fall jobs and was keeping their needs as forerunner in my search. Then this new family offered me a great position with the same level of pay I have now (I'm paid far over market)

[Anonymous]

Not an MB, but I think you're only going to get biased responses from them. As a nanny, I don't think you did anything wrong. They knew you were looking for a new position, you didn't go into it looking for a position that starts early, and it'd be the height of stupidity to turn down a job offer at above market rates for the convenience of a family that is cutting you loose anyway. Not everything worked out according to her little time table. She will live.

[Anonymous]

PP here again

Does the new MB know you are leaving your old job earlier than agreed? I'm just saying, you've done this once , and ended up with a less than ideal boss. It may be an acceptable risk to you, given the new pay and security, but someone thAt would knowingly hire a nanny who was leaving their old family in a bind, obviously places their own needs above other peoples. At some point, that other person may be you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:PP here again

Does the new MB know you are leaving your old job earlier than agreed? I'm just saying, you've done this once , and ended up with a less than ideal boss. It may be an acceptable risk to you, given the new pay and security, but someone thAt would knowingly hire a nanny who was leaving their old family in a bind, obviously places their own needs above other peoples. At some point, that other person may be you.

OP here.
Yes, she knows I'm leaving early.

[Anonymous]

If the situation were reversed, MB knowing her nanny is leaving, finds perfect nanny who needs to start early, etc. no one would fault OP.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Not an MB, but I think you're only going to get biased responses from them. As a nanny, I don't think you did anything wrong. They knew you were looking for a new position, you didn't go into it looking for a position that starts early, and it'd be the height of stupidity to turn down a job offer at above market rates for the convenience of a family that is cutting you loose anyway. Not everything worked out according to her little time table. She will live.

I think this is a tough situation on both sides and everyone is wrong, but sometimes these things are what they are and OP has to do what is best for her. But in response to the PP, if the nanny had said she was leaving in the fall and the parents happened to find the perfect replacement but she needed to start a few months early, the nannies on this board would be up in arms against the MB if she let the nanny go early. These things go both ways.

[Anonymous]

I posted on here a few years ago with the same situation, only I left 2 months early (in time for them to employ a summer nanny from a huge pool of applicants), offered to train the new nanny and gave them 6 weeks notice(instea of the 2 in our contract) and I was told that I was screwing my MB.
Interesting.

[Anonymous]

I think I would have done the same...they are ending your position in August and you have to find something else to support your family. Sure it would have been nice if the timing worked out perfectly but she can find a short term summer nanny whereas it's harder for you to find a job that starts the exact day after your current job ends. And if this one pays above market you'd be crazy not to take it.

[Anonymous]

I think you were wrong to accept a job a quarter of a year before your end-date. I think you were wrong to allow yourself to be poached from your old employer. I think your MB was wrong to yell at you - she could have told you without yelling how frustrated and disappointed she was in you for leaving them a quarter of a year early.

[Anonymous]

MB here.

It's never appropriate to yell at anyone, and it was extremely unprofessional and just plain wrong for her to treat you that way.

That being said, while I think in the end you need to look out for your own interests, taking a job that much earlier than your end date wasn't the kindest way to treat your boss. I'm assuming there were no other issues, of course. If, as the new boss, I knew you were doing this, I wouldn't have hired you, as id be concerned you'd do the same to me.

So, IMO, wrong on both sides... Edge to mb for worse behavior.

MB here and I agree with most of what this poster said.

Obviously, you need to look out for yourself and your family first. If this is the perfect job, then I think you have to take it. That said, I can understand why an MB would be upset that you are leaving three months early. That is a long time. It is also a bit odd that you would be looking for fall jobs this early, unless you are in an area with few nanny jobs.

Of course, she absolutely should not have yelled at you or treated you poorly or anything of that sort. That is horrible. Besides, it can't have been that much of a surprise if she was called as a reference.

I hope your last two weeks go more smoothly with her and you enjoy your next job.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

MB here.

It's never appropriate to yell at anyone, and it was extremely unprofessional and just plain wrong for her to treat you that way.

That being said, while I think in the end you need to look out for your own interests, taking a job that much earlier than your end date wasn't the kindest way to treat your boss. I'm assuming there were no other issues, of course. If, as the new boss, I knew you were doing this, I wouldn't have hired you, as id be concerned you'd do the same to me.

So, IMO, wrong on both sides... Edge to mb for worse behavior.

MB here and I agree with most of what this poster said.

Obviously, you need to look out for yourself and your family first. If this is the perfect job, then I think you have to take it. That said, I can understand why an MB would be upset that you are leaving three months early. That is a long time. It is also a bit odd that you would be looking for fall jobs this early, unless you are in an area with few nanny jobs.

Of course, she absolutely should not have yelled at you or treated you poorly or anything of that sort. That is horrible. Besides, it can't have been that much of a surprise if she was called as a reference.

I hope your last two weeks go more smoothly with her and you enjoy your next job.

OP again. I only care for newborn -2yo and have found that new parents (in this area) tend to look for care while pregnant to begin after maternity leave has ended. Up until this MB contacted me (with an ad that did not have a start frame), I had only been interviewing for September positions.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Not an MB, but I think you're only going to get biased responses from them. As a nanny, I don't think you did anything wrong. They knew you were looking for a new position, you didn't go into it looking for a position that starts early, and it'd be the height of stupidity to turn down a job offer at above market rates for the convenience of a family that is cutting you loose anyway. Not everything worked out according to her little time table. She will live.

I think this is a tough situation on both sides and everyone is wrong, but sometimes these things are what they are and OP has to do what is best for her. But in response to the PP, if the nanny had said she was leaving in the fall and the parents happened to find the perfect replacement but she needed to start a few months early, the nannies on this board would be up in arms against the MB if she let the nanny go early. These things go both ways.

+1. I'm an MB and if I'm being totally honest I think if I was in that situation I would be annoyed/frustrated at the situation but if the nanny explained to me that she had tried finding a job to start later but couldn't I would understand that she had to do what's best for herself. I would most definitely NOT yell at the nanny which is always inappropriate. At the end of the day we all have to do what's best for ourselves/family.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I think you were wrong to accept a job a quarter of a year before your end-date. I think you were wrong to allow yourself to be poached from your old employer. I think your MB was wrong to yell at you - she could have told you without yelling how frustrated and disappointed she was in you for leaving them a quarter of a year early.

My last day is 5/13 vs original last day of 8/1.
In my last position I was very dissatisfied, my pay was continually jacked with and I had no contract, or had even discussed how long they needed a nanny. My current MB never commented today on my level of care of her child, only as me personally in that I am a horrible person.