I need an expectations check on texting during work hours

[Anonymous]

50 texts within an 8 hour period is roughly 6 texts per hour.

If that were one or two days a week I could understand that something is going on, plans are being made, etc. But on a regular, every day basis that's not cool. The nanny should get the children engaged in something else before texting.

[Anonymous]

First of all tell her that phone use during the time she is with your children should be kept to a minimum.

Do you need or use text to communicate with her? If you don't, or only use it rarely you could change her cell phone plan to include very limited text messages. Then charge her for the overages.

[Anonymous]

MB here. You are a controlling person. Your kids do not need to be constantly engaged. Did it ever occur to you that while you go to work and have adult conversation, your nanny is with your kids all day. Yes we pay nannies to do a job, but it is important to realize that there is a need for communication outside of talking to kids all day. Also, if she is in fact with your family this much, maybe she needs to communicate with her own friends and family.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:MB here. You are a controlling person. Your kids do not need to be constantly engaged. Did it ever occur to you that while you go to work and have adult conversation, your nanny is with your kids all day. Yes we pay nannies to do a job, but it is important to realize that there is a need for communication outside of talking to kids all day. Also, if she is in fact with your family this much, maybe she needs to communicate with her own friends and family.

No way are you an MB. Kids don't need to be entertained all day, true, but if the kids are bothered enough to complain about the nanny's phone use it means they feel second-best to the nanny's phone. That's a problem.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:MB here. You are a controlling person. Your kids do not need to be constantly engaged. Did it ever occur to you that while you go to work and have adult conversation, your nanny is with your kids all day. Yes we pay nannies to do a job, but it is important to realize that there is a need for communication outside of talking to kids all day. Also, if she is in fact with your family this much, maybe she needs to communicate with her own friends and family.

OP here. The nastiness is really uncalled for. My kids have told me its an issue and I'm gathering input on what is a reasonable expectation before I talk with her.

[Anonymous]

I'm not sure why you are paying for her phone, but since you are the answer is simple. Take away the data plan and tell your expectations are that she will not be on the phone during work hours except for emergencies.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'm not sure why you are paying for her phone, but since you are the answer is simple. Take away the data plan and tell your expectations are that she will not be on the phone during work hours except for emergencies.

Her contract was ending and it only costs us $40 a month to add her to our family plan, so we did that.

[Anonymous]

How old are your kids?

[Anonymous]

3 and 5

[Anonymous]

This is tricky.. It depends when shes texting and how she's engaging with your children while shes texting.. If they are coloring and she glances at her phone to reply to a text, that's one thing. But if shes running to hide in the bathroom to continue a conversation, that's another story. 50 texts a day seems like a lot but it's all depending on the person and how they text. It's too bad you can't see how often shes on the internet on her phone because that takes a lot more attention than texting, and might be why your children are complaining. Give her an official "warning" and see what happens, if this problem continues I would find another nanny.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This is tricky.. It depends when shes texting and how she's engaging with your children while shes texting.. If they are coloring and she glances at her phone to reply to a text, that's one thing. But if shes running to hide in the bathroom to continue a conversation, that's another story. 50 texts a day seems like a lot but it's all depending on the person and how they text. It's too bad you can't see how often shes on the internet on her phone because that takes a lot more attention than texting, and might be why your children are complaining. Give her an official "warning" and see what happens, if this problem continues I would find another nanny.

Thanks PP. I think this is why I'm hesitating. The phone records tell me that she's texting during the day (although she told me when I asked her that she wasn't). I know she's using whatsapp and our WIFI, so I can only assume that the phone records tell the minimum that she's using her phone. I am totally ok with a quick text or handling making a plan for later that night or whatever, particularly when the kids are engaged on their own, which they are sometimes (although I'm not sure why those things can't be handled during their 1.5-2 hour naptime). But there really is no way to tell and she's already shown me that she's not going to be truthful.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This is tricky.. It depends when shes texting and how she's engaging with your children while shes texting.. If they are coloring and she glances at her phone to reply to a text, that's one thing. But if shes running to hide in the bathroom to continue a conversation, that's another story. 50 texts a day seems like a lot but it's all depending on the person and how they text. It's too bad you can't see how often shes on the internet on her phone because that takes a lot more attention than texting, and might be why your children are complaining. Give her an official "warning" and see what happens, if this problem continues I would find another nanny.

Thanks PP. I think this is why I'm hesitating. The phone records tell me that she's texting during the day (although she told me when I asked her that she wasn't). I know she's using whatsapp and our WIFI, so I can only assume that the phone records tell the minimum that she's using her phone. I am totally ok with a quick text or handling making a plan for later that night or whatever, particularly when the kids are engaged on their own, which they are sometimes (although I'm not sure why those things can't be handled during their 1.5-2 hour naptime). But there really is no way to tell and she's already shown me that she's not going to be truthful.

Good luck! Just trust your gut instinct.

[Anonymous]

Given the timing, way too many.

[Anonymous]

"if the kids are bothered enough to complain about the nanny's phone use it means they feel second-best to the nanny's phone. "

agree.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:MB here. You are a controlling person. Your kids do not need to be constantly engaged. Did it ever occur to you that while you go to work and have adult conversation, your nanny is with your kids all day. Yes we pay nannies to do a job, but it is important to realize that there is a need for communication outside of talking to kids all day. Also, if she is in fact with your family this much, maybe she needs to communicate with her own friends and family.

My mb would say this!!!!!