+1 |
I don't want my life to be about whether men find me attractive. As I get older I really couldn't care less if there is a male gaze, it seems so silly. I just want to do things I enjoy and enjoy life, I don't need or want outside validation. |
As a woman, who was never the “hottest” in a room, even when I was the only one and as a woman who was “invisible in my 20 and 30’s, I found that I became visible in my later 40’s and more and more into my 50’s. More people pay attention and listen to to me now than ever. I wonder what my 60’s will bring. However, my new level of ‘visibility’ may just be your new level on invisibility. |
I feel the same way. I don’t care about being hot to men. If DH left me, I doubt I would bother with another relationship. That is why I wrote if it was important to people. My grandmother did not seem to care either. She never wanted to remarry because she did not want to become a caretaker to a sick husband a second |
Completely agree with you. |
Now I just want to outlive Covid than I’ll worry about my midlife crisis lol though I’m not coloring my grays right now just to see how my CovidHair looks |
There was a great follow up to the women’s midlife crisis in the shadow of covid. https://www.cnn.com/2020/04/20/health/generation-x-coronavirus-calhoun-kalita-wellness/index.html |
This is an interesting post. I am a divorced 56-year-old man and usually date women in their early to mid-50s. Dating is so much better now than it was in my 20s because women my age are not as focused on issues like suitable relationships. Instead, they focus on enjoying themselves, and most seem to be much more open to enjoying dating then they were when they were dating pre-marriage. Most say they want and enjoy sex so much more now and that they feel free to enjoy a sexual relationship for its own sake. Of course, the women posting here would have better input on this issue. Finally, I (and believe most other divorced men my age) are not looking for anyone to take care of us. We have our own money, take care of ourselves (I know I am in much better shape than when I was married), and are looking to enjoy life as well. |
Agree. Women who depend on men for affirmation have self esteem issues. Grandma would pet any dog is more like it. Not all of us want to pick up strays which btw doesn't have anything to do with social skills, lol.. |
I agree that there is way more to life than keeping men (or women) interested. However, the term "hotness" is normally applied by one sex to the appearance of another (e.g., he is hot in his daddy swimsuit, she is hot in her PTA President uniform). |
That term sounds like someone who is regressed. (never matured). |
Boomer here, I can relate... I’m starting not to care... |
I'm new here..what's the U curve? Whatever it is I'm sure I'm at the bottom! |
So does the mindset of a midlife crisis ever go away once you've reached that threshold?
My 72 yr old MIL who has no filter, no boundaries, loves to complain, gets on her soapbox over every little thing, and could care less. But she's 72 yrs old, not 50-ish. |
Then that's not midlife crisis, but crappy attitude. And she's probably always been this way. |