My cleaning lady stole my engagement ring (and other jewelry) - what to do?
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Anonymous
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I am 99% sure that my cleaning lady of 3 years stole my engagement ring and some jewelry. I've painstakingly gone through my entire house and there is no-one who could have taken or misplaced these as only close family has visited. We also have not had any service folks come by in the last month when the jewelry went missing. I'd like your input on how to best handle. My husband really wants us to file a police report and provide the cleaner's contact info to them, and let the police handle. I'm more cynical that anything will come of it, and I also just want to get my jewelry back - I don't want to press charges or ruin her life if this was just a mistake. She seems to have a pretty stable life-husband, children, has a steady cleaning gig. That's in part why I've trusted her all these years.
She is planning to come this Thursday to do her usual cleaning. I'm thinking of sitting her down and asking her for the missing jewelry and if need be, even drive her to her house so we can retrieve them. I also will tell her that I won't press charges but she needs to come clean. But if she denies it (and then subsequently gets rid of the jewelry before the police get involved), then what do I do? I'd be in the same position. I'm just heartbroken. The engagement ring has a lot of sentimental value, as do the other jewelry. They were wedding presents from my parents and my in-laws. I hope everyone keeps their valuables locked up. I have learned my lesson. |
Anonymous
| Why do you believe she stole your ring? |
Anonymous
| 3 years...shes been cleaning for you for 3 years...and you give her not one bit of credit? SMH. |
Anonymous
| Pppssshhhh close family is much more likely to screw you over statically then a house cleaner. |
Anonymous
| Wow, OP. What makes you think it was her? |
Anonymous
Yep. Especially if they're hiding a gambling or drug addiction. |
Anonymous
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OP here.
There is literally no other explanation. Only my parents and my close cousin who is like a sister have visited me. They are even more unlikely than a non-related family member like the cleaner. We have not had anyone else visit during the last several weeks when these items went missing. I've searched EVERYWHERE. |
Anonymous
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Did she put them away and you can't find them? Did they get knocked down a drain?
Is it just your ring, or is other jewelry missing too? |
Anonymous
| I would not directly accuse her. Rather, I would tell her, my (whatever it is) is missing. Please let me know if you see it while you're cleaning. She won't, inevitably, so you ask again. At that point, indicate you have contacted the police. |
Anonymous
OP, I always end up finding my "missing" jewelry and feel bad thinking who may have taken it etc... 
Keep looking out for it. |
Anonymous
+1. |
Anonymous
+1 My MIL and SIL are the same. |
Anonymous
| Are you certain the door wasn't left unlocked one day and someone came in and took it? That has happened where I live. Thieves don't necessarily make it obvious there was a theft. If the jewelry was in an obvious place like a box on your dresser, it's the first place someone is going to look when they enter your house. |
Anonymous
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This literally can be as simple as this:
"hi Cleaner Cindy while your cleaning today can you keep an eye out for ________, we can't find it anywhere!" "OOO sorry Mrs. Boss they are on top of the bathroom window sill, I moved them when I was cleaning last week and forgot to put them back on the dresser." |
doodlebug
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this is what i was thinking too. |