My cleaning lady stole my engagement ring (and other jewelry) - what to do?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Are you certain the door wasn't left unlocked one day and someone came in and took it? That has happened where I live. Thieves don't necessarily make it obvious there was a theft. If the jewelry was in an obvious place like a box on your dresser, it's the first place someone is going to look when they enter your house.

RIGHT??? I love it how OP assumes no outside criminal activity can ever occur in her precious abode where only the help can steal.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP, I always end up finding my "missing" jewelry and feel bad thinking who may have taken it etc...
Keep looking out for it.

OP here. I sincerely hope and wish to find these. I have never really lost anything of value (I'm generally very organized). SIGH. I am so heartbroken over this.

So far, the only suggestion is that I should ask her indirectly, rather than outright? Anyone else have thoughts?

Anyone else experienced something similar? Thank you.

[Anonymous]

Your house cleaner has a lot to lose if she actually did this, but also if she is wrongly accused, which makes me think she did not do it.

Just bc your cousin is family doesn't mean they didnt do it, they are capable of stealing too, specially if no one would suspect it was them. I actually witnessed a cousin of mine steal either coins or stamps from my mom's house. Don't remember what but it was something of small value. Either way, I'd say if anything it was your cousin.
Also, why dont you wear your engagement ring?

[Anonymous]

I just find it so F-ed up your first plan would be to accuse her, drive her to her house to capture your gold, tell her you won't go to the police etc etc. WTF???? Wouldn't your FIRST instinct be to say something like "Jane have u seen my rings, can't find em?"?????

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, I always end up finding my "missing" jewelry and feel bad thinking who may have taken it etc...
Keep looking out for it.

OP here. I sincerely hope and wish to find these. I have never really lost anything of value (I'm generally very organized). SIGH. I am so heartbroken over this.

So far, the only suggestion is that I should ask her indirectly, rather than outright? Anyone else have thoughts?

Anyone else experienced something similar? Thank you.

I lost an expensive ring and later found it. I'm still confused as to why you think she did it...process of elimination?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This literally can be as simple as this:

"hi Cleaner Cindy while your cleaning today can you keep an eye out for ________, we can't find it anywhere!"

"OOO sorry Mrs. Boss they are on top of the bathroom window sill, I moved them when I was cleaning last week and forgot to put them back on the dresser."

This is what you need to do OP. And it's the most likely to get you a good outcome. Cause I don't believe your cleaner of three years just starts stealing.

[Anonymous]

I've often blamed the cleaning lady when I can't find something and I've always found it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This literally can be as simple as this:

"hi Cleaner Cindy while your cleaning today can you keep an eye out for ________, we can't find it anywhere!"

"OOO sorry Mrs. Boss they are on top of the bathroom window sill, I moved them when I was cleaning last week and forgot to put them back on the dresser."

This is what you need to do OP. And it's the most likely to get you a good outcome. Cause I don't believe your cleaner of three years just starts stealing.

This.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Your house cleaner has a lot to lose if she actually did this, but also if she is wrongly accused, which makes me think she did not do it.

Just bc your cousin is family doesn't mean they didnt do it, they are capable of stealing too, specially if no one would suspect it was them. I actually witnessed a cousin of mine steal either coins or stamps from my mom's house. Don't remember what but it was something of small value. Either way, I'd say if anything it was your cousin.
Also, why dont you wear your engagement ring?

What? Borrowing a quarter isn't stealing...

[Anonymous]

doodlebug wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Pppssshhhh close family is much more likely to screw you over statically then a house cleaner.

Yep. Especially if they're hiding a gambling or drug addiction.

this is what i was thinking too.

If my family members were that hard-pressed up for money, I would gladly give them money. But they're not. They are well off.

[Anonymous]

If she stole it, she probably won't show up to clean tomorrow. My friend's cleaning person stole her engagement ring and then disappeared. Shut of her (burner) phone. Ghost. Police couldn't do anything...couldn't find her.

We don't have a cleaning service because of that friends incident.n

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Are you certain the door wasn't left unlocked one day and someone came in and took it? That has happened where I live. Thieves don't necessarily make it obvious there was a theft. If the jewelry was in an obvious place like a box on your dresser, it's the first place someone is going to look when they enter your house.

RIGHT??? I love it how OP assumes no outside criminal activity can ever occur in her precious abode where only the help can steal.

Not possible. I have video cameras everywhere (except of course, my bedroom where these items are kept).

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Your house cleaner has a lot to lose if she actually did this, but also if she is wrongly accused, which makes me think she did not do it.

Just bc your cousin is family doesn't mean they didnt do it, they are capable of stealing too, specially if no one would suspect it was them. I actually witnessed a cousin of mine steal either coins or stamps from my mom's house. Don't remember what but it was something of small value. Either way, I'd say if anything it was your cousin.
Also, why dont you wear your engagement ring?

I just wear my wedding band. I have a baby and I don't want to inadvertently scratch her with it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This literally can be as simple as this:

"hi Cleaner Cindy while your cleaning today can you keep an eye out for ________, we can't find it anywhere!"

"OOO sorry Mrs. Boss they are on top of the bathroom window sill, I moved them when I was cleaning last week and forgot to put them back on the dresser."

This. My mom always thought her cleaning lady stole things too. We usually found they were misplaced. Only once did someone actually steal something.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If she stole it, she probably won't show up to clean tomorrow. My friend's cleaning person stole her engagement ring and then disappeared. Shut of her (burner) phone. Ghost. Police couldn't do anything...couldn't find her.

We don't have a cleaning service because of that friends incident.n

Did your friends not have insurance? I can't imagine basing my decisions around such fear.

OP. You are 99% certain that someone stole something of pretty significant value from you but you haven't called the police?

No, you aren't that certain at all. Because 99% is pretty darn certain. I'd question your sanity were you actually CERTAIN that someone robbed you and you didn't report it. But you aren't that certain and that's why you haven't reported it.