Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm the PP. I forgot to give my recommendation for a response to people who ask questions: "Why do you ask?" That usually helps them remember their manners.

My friend who is half white, half Korean says he is tired of people asking him "what are you?
It's usually asked by other asians.
So now, when someone asks him "what are you? He tells them "I'm a human being." And smile

Haha.. Humor is a good deflector.

Anonymous wrote:I'm Caucasian, my husband is Asian. My husband's never mentioned this to me, but I wonder sometimes if he doesn't get curious looks more than I do. Our son looks like me, only with asian hair, dark eyes and olive skin. He doesn't have my husbands features but obviously, because of the hair and eye color, you realize they're father and son. Baby pictures side by side, my son looks identical to me as a baby.

We had a birthday party for our son a couple weeks back. After the party, my husband was commenting on how I only invited the interracial families from his preschool to the party. That was never my intention, but my son is drawn to these children, and the parents are friendly with each other, but it was never obvious to me.

OP-I would think that maybe the comments or questions are more inquisitive in nature than being racist. People are curious.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm Caucasian, my husband is Asian. My husband's never mentioned this to me, but I wonder sometimes if he doesn't get curious looks more than I do. Our son looks like me, only with asian hair, dark eyes and olive skin. He doesn't have my husbands features but obviously, because of the hair and eye color, you realize they're father and son. Baby pictures side by side, my son looks identical to me as a baby.

We had a birthday party for our son a couple weeks back. After the party, my husband was commenting on how I only invited the interracial families from his preschool to the party. That was never my intention, but my son is drawn to these children, and the parents are friendly with each other, but it was never obvious to me.

OP-I would think that maybe the comments or questions are more inquisitive in nature than being racist. People are curious.

That's so interesting. OP here. Thank you for sharing your experience. I love the way both of my girls look. One of them looks just like you describe - olive, black hair, dark eyes but all of my husband's features. she looks asian and i love that! i am probably a little insecure of my own heritage. only because, i was darker than my sister. i'm not sure why indians pay attention to the color of their skin. but to be honest, it is something i struggle with....

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm Caucasian, my husband is Asian. My husband's never mentioned this to me, but I wonder sometimes if he doesn't get curious looks more than I do. Our son looks like me, only with asian hair, dark eyes and olive skin. He doesn't have my husbands features but obviously, because of the hair and eye color, you realize they're father and son. Baby pictures side by side, my son looks identical to me as a baby.

We had a birthday party for our son a couple weeks back. After the party, my husband was commenting on how I only invited the interracial families from his preschool to the party. That was never my intention, but my son is drawn to these children, and the parents are friendly with each other, but it was never obvious to me.

OP-I would think that maybe the comments or questions are more inquisitive in nature than being racist. People are curious.

That's so interesting. OP here. Thank you for sharing your experience. I love the way both of my girls look. One of them looks just like you describe - olive, black hair, dark eyes but all of my husband's features. she looks asian and i love that! i am probably a little insecure of my own heritage. only because, i was darker than my sister. i'm not sure why indians pay attention to the color of their skin. but to be honest, it is something i struggle with....

Anywhere the British were, indigenous people seem to struggle with the idea that whiter is better. I see it in my husband's country of origin as well.

Anonymous wrote:
HI OP here. I agree with you. I'm not sure why that's the feeling that prevails. Every day I struggle with it. I will try not to reflect that feeling upon my children. For that reason, I shy away from Indians. I'm sorry to say, color of skin is too important . and it makes no sense. i struggled as a child. i remember winning a summer abroad and getting a "tan". My uncle asked if i had a skin disease. He asked this of a 14 year old. My sister, who is Indian, has green eyes and white skin. fullly indian. she was preferred in all venues -- parents, family, friends. It's something I struggle with. All asians out there, be PROUD of who you are. Colonialism is over. It is time to define who we are by WHO WE ARE.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
HI OP here. I agree with you. I'm not sure why that's the feeling that prevails. Every day I struggle with it. I will try not to reflect that feeling upon my children. For that reason, I shy away from Indians. I'm sorry to say, color of skin is too important . and it makes no sense. i struggled as a child. i remember winning a summer abroad and getting a "tan". My uncle asked if i had a skin disease. He asked this of a 14 year old. My sister, who is Indian, has green eyes and white skin. fullly indian. she was preferred in all venues -- parents, family, friends. It's something I struggle with. All asians out there, be PROUD of who you are. Colonialism is over. It is time to define who we are by WHO WE ARE.

Be proud of who you are. Blacks should support each other.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
HI OP here. I agree with you. I'm not sure why that's the feeling that prevails. Every day I struggle with it. I will try not to reflect that feeling upon my children. For that reason, I shy away from Indians. I'm sorry to say, color of skin is too important . and it makes no sense. i struggled as a child. i remember winning a summer abroad and getting a "tan". My uncle asked if i had a skin disease. He asked this of a 14 year old. My sister, who is Indian, has green eyes and white skin. fullly indian. she was preferred in all venues -- parents, family, friends. It's something I struggle with. All asians out there, be PROUD of who you are. Colonialism is over. It is time to define who we are by WHO WE ARE.

Be proud of who you are. Blacks should support each other.

Yeah OP, be proud of who you are! I sensed what you were struggling with from the first read of your post. I initially assumed you are AA. We're all so connected.

You express yourself beautifully, your children and husband are blessed to have you.

Anonymous wrote:OP here: thank you so much! it's hard sometimes. People think i'm the nanny. Or if I'm with someone caucasian, they are a relative... I love my ethnicity, but Indians are standoffish, and I'm not sure why. Do they think I don't like being asian. I am not insecure about being asian but asians are the most difficult with me... i'm just being honest.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
HI OP here. I agree with you. I'm not sure why that's the feeling that prevails. Every day I struggle with it. I will try not to reflect that feeling upon my children. For that reason, I shy away from Indians. I'm sorry to say, color of skin is too important . and it makes no sense. i struggled as a child. i remember winning a summer abroad and getting a "tan". My uncle asked if i had a skin disease. He asked this of a 14 year old. My sister, who is Indian, has green eyes and white skin. fullly indian. she was preferred in all venues -- parents, family, friends. It's something I struggle with. All asians out there, be PROUD of who you are. Colonialism is over. It is time to define who we are by WHO WE ARE.

Be proud of who you are. Blacks should support each other.

Anonymous wrote:My mother is Japanese and my father is white. This is something I've dealt with as well. It's only a big deal if I let it bother me. I've learned to live with other people's confusion at my appearance. I get people speaking to me in Spanish all the time. Some random person on the Metro asked me if I was from Kazakhstan. I'm constantly asked, "Where are you from?" If I've recently moved back to the US from Japan I get, "Your English is good." In Japan I've startled people by talking to them in perfect Japanese while others have just looked at my face and decided that they don't understand the words coming out of my mouth.

I tend to ask people about their ethnic background because I don't assume that just because you are "black" you are African-American. I have a friend who is Jewish/African-American and people just assume she is African-American and forward her Christian emails even though she celebrates Chanukah and speaks Yiddish.

I am also interested to see what other combinations are out there. I know people of all sorts of interesting backgrounds like Vietnamese/Mexican, German/Ecuadorian, and Russian/Japanese (their parents were actually from those countries). Sometimes the exotic looking person I'm talking to is simply Italian

I am proud of my ethnic background, despite the WWII comments I've gotten, and look forward to the future with my fair-skinned, blondish baby with blue eyes who somehow manages to look like my offspring.