Anonymous wrote:
She was making ~$140K working for a large international corp located in DC and yet, was having to drive Uber on the weekends to make ends meet. A
This does not make any sense - at many levels
Anonymous wrote:OP--I'm so sorry for your loss. Online dating is not for everyone. It's a lot like going to the bars used to be for us. You would go out and see if there was anyone that caught your eye and you would walk over and talk to that person.....maybe you walked away with their number.
Online dating is a lot like that except you don't have to go to the bar. You find a person that is attractive to you and you start a conversation. If its seems to be going well, you exchange numbers and eventually meet in person.
The problem with this is that the entire "transaction" takes much longer than the old way. People may not respond immediately and the initial get to know you can take a week or longer before you decide to finally meet.
The other thing that I've found is that my definition of attractive has changed. Let's me honest....I'm 45. I no longer have perky boobs, rock hard abs, and the youthful glow of an 18yr old. In my mind however, I think that's exactly what I look like. This carries over into what I'm looking for.....I still think I'm looking for that really cute 18yr old guy with the full head of dark hair, the broad shoulders, the swagger that comes with the innocence of youth. Then when I look at a 50+ profile, of course I'm disappointed.
Now at our age, we both know that looks aren't everything. But that's how online dating starts the process. If I were to meet the same man at an event, I would probably happily chat with him. Maybe it will go somewhere and maybe it won't. But by being at an event together, we already have a common platform to springboard the conversation. If we're getting along, it might be natural to continue the conversation after the event is over. And if I don't meet someone at an event, at least I've had a nice night out doing something that I enjoy. But online, it's way to easy just to ignore someone that isn't physically attractive off the bat to you.
I've found that internet dating sucks. I've met one or two people that I've gone out with 4-5x but it just sort of fizzled. My advice is to go to events that you enjoy and just expand your circle of friends. Who knows who you might meet.
Anonymous wrote:OP--I'm so sorry for your loss. Online dating is not for everyone. It's a lot like going to the bars used to be for us. You would go out and see if there was anyone that caught your eye and you would walk over and talk to that person.....maybe you walked away with their number.
Online dating is a lot like that except you don't have to go to the bar. You find a person that is attractive to you and you start a conversation. If its seems to be going well, you exchange numbers and eventually meet in person.
The problem with this is that the entire "transaction" takes much longer than the old way. People may not respond immediately and the initial get to know you can take a week or longer before you decide to finally meet.
The other thing that I've found is that my definition of attractive has changed. Let's me honest....I'm 45. I no longer have perky boobs, rock hard abs, and the youthful glow of an 18yr old. In my mind however, I think that's exactly what I look like. This carries over into what I'm looking for.....I still think I'm looking for that really cute 18yr old guy with the full head of dark hair, the broad shoulders, the swagger that comes with the innocence of youth. Then when I look at a 50+ profile, of course I'm disappointed.
Now at our age, we both know that looks aren't everything. But that's how online dating starts the process. If I were to meet the same man at an event, I would probably happily chat with him. Maybe it will go somewhere and maybe it won't. But by being at an event together, we already have a common platform to springboard the conversation. If we're getting along, it might be natural to continue the conversation after the event is over. And if I don't meet someone at an event, at least I've had a nice night out doing something that I enjoy. But online, it's way to easy just to ignore someone that isn't physically attractive off the bat to you.
I've found that internet dating sucks. I've met one or two people that I've gone out with 4-5x but it just sort of fizzled. My advice is to go to events that you enjoy and just expand your circle of friends. Who knows who you might meet.
Anonymous wrote:Perhaps, Internet dating isn't for you since you prefer interpersonal contact and it would be hard to perceive online if a woman is a match for your southern charm. Are you looking for someone in your age range? Someone without kids? Someone long-term? Short term?
You seem to have many great qualities and should have no problem finding a suitable partner. You may just have to put yourself out there and get involved in some activities or groups so you can meet new people.
Anonymous wrote:Hi OP. Just going by your post, it appears that you want to fit another woman in the space that your wife left and I would not find that attractive. This is a time to reinvent yourself somewhat (e.g. why live in a 5-bdr house?).
Anonymous wrote:I'm sorry for your loss, OP.
What is your result? Little interest? Wrong types of people? Why do you think you're doing something wrong?
Internet is not for dating; it's for getting in touch with people you wouldn't meet otherwise. Quite nifty. No reason why you can't switch to calls or meet rather quickly, if there's interest.