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Anonymous wrote:If you want deep conversations hire a therapist once a week.
I don't think it's wrong to want your partner to want to have deep conversations with. Telling someone to have those talks with a therapist is really dismissive.
I've been divorced for over 15 years, had a few short relationships since.
I think the most important thing is to be happy with yourself ALONE. I'm not talking about loneliness which can exist even if you're with someone, I'm talking about being ALONE and HAPPY. Being alone and happy IS my anchor and my peace. It helps me realize that any man I now let into my life needs to ADD to my peace and not take away from it. Settling is not an option for me.
There are things I require, and I know it's not too much for me to ask. I'm not looking for a perfect man per se, but I am looking for a self aware man who TRIES to see outside of his own lens to make sure I'm getting my needs met as well. Honestly, men aren't hard to please, but women are hard to please based on the fact that most men don't have much emotional IQ. That is something they must work on in order to date me. And until then I will remain single and happy alone. I don't have to energy to raise a man to be an emotionally available man. That is something that must come from himself within, and I am worth it. This is just my take. I have settled in the past and I simply don't have the energy for that. Why should I pour energy into a man who can't pour energy into me?
I think the most important thing is to be happy with yourself ALONE. I'm not talking about loneliness which can exist even if you're with someone, I'm talking about being ALONE and HAPPY. Being alone and happy IS my anchor and my peace. It helps me realize that any man I now let into my life needs to ADD to my peace and not take away from it. Settling is not an option for me.
There are things I require, and I know it's not too much for me to ask. I'm not looking for a perfect man per se, but I am looking for a self aware man who TRIES to see outside of his own lens to make sure I'm getting my needs met as well. Honestly, men aren't hard to please, but women are hard to please based on the fact that most men don't have much emotional IQ. That is something they must work on in order to date me. And until then I will remain single and happy alone. I don't have to energy to raise a man to be an emotionally available man. That is something that must come from himself within, and I am worth it. This is just my take. I have settled in the past and I simply don't have the energy for that. Why should I pour energy into a man who can't pour energy into me?
My mother passed about 12 years ago and I have not missed her since. The years have flown by and my life has truly been peaceful without her.
Please put yourself FIRST, I wish ai had done more of that myself. It was nothing but wasted energy on my part to try to make things better for her, she wasn't grateful or thankful.
Use your energy to nourish yourself. She's taken enough from you. You are #1 so don't ever feel bad for prioritizing your own mental health. No one is looking out for you more than you will!
Please put yourself FIRST, I wish ai had done more of that myself. It was nothing but wasted energy on my part to try to make things better for her, she wasn't grateful or thankful.
Use your energy to nourish yourself. She's taken enough from you. You are #1 so don't ever feel bad for prioritizing your own mental health. No one is looking out for you more than you will!