My friend Sara, who is single, was telling me about a man, John, from work who’s getting married in December. Their dept at work is only 10 people. She’s bothered because she wasn’t invited and so far only 2 men from the dept are invited. She doesn’t like John. She thinks he’s lazy and too social at work. She’s annoyed because she recruited him for the dept. The boss seems to be happy with John’s work though and he’s one of the 2 invited. Sara thinks the whole dept (all 10 of them) should be invited, without spouses, and have their own table at the wedding. Only Sara and one guy in the dept are single. She’s not interested in him and he has a girlfriend. I told her John can’t invite guests and not invite their spouses too. That’s very socially weird and why would they attend a celebration of marriage without their spouse. She thinks spouses wouldn’t mind not being invited because they don’t know John well or at all, anyway. I told her you can’t invite a married person, or a guest with a significant other, to a wedding without the other person. Who’s right in this situation?

What happened? Please update us.

Anonymous wrote:I would kindly text him, letting him know that you have changed your mind about the date.

Tell him you also think it best to no longer communicate & wish him all the best.

Then never communicate w/him again.
Ever.

I'm the OP. I realize I made a terrible mistake with my actions that night. It was impulsive and dangerous. I was drunk, and I've been horny and lonely for years but especially since I broke up with my BF last October, who I on;y dated for 5 months. I'm almost always single. I could never ghost someone. I aim to treat people the way I want to be treated. I think he deserves the respect of me informing him that I'm canceling our date. So I sent him a text hours ago stating "I changed my mind about the date. I can't communicate with you anymore. I wish you all the best." He replied soon after, "ok".

Then I made an appt with my doctor for STD testing next week. I should get my period in about 6 days (I use a phone app to chart my period to avoid pregnancy, and use condoms).

Now 7 hours later, he's texting me asking why I have a change of heart when things started off so great. He was probably shocked earlier and is now confused. I don't want to hurt or insult him by bringing up that I know about his drug addiction/arrests. I don't know if he's still using heroin, but he's drinking alcohol, which is a bad sign. I once read that only 10% of heroin addicts fully recover. I do not want to form a relationship with someone with a drug history, especially a longtime problem with heroin.

What should I do?

please help! I went to the bar with friends, drank too much alcohol, met a cute guy who also drank too much alcohol, and hit it off. I was comfortable with him because he was there with a male acquaintance of mine from my neighborhood so I assumed "Joe" is a nice, normal guy. That same night, Joe and I went back to my place, and had sex with a condom. Next morning, we agreed to go on a date and he left my house. We texted for the next couple of days. On one text I named a store I was at, think Macy's. He replied that Macy was his last name. I didn't think anything of it at the time. A few days pass and he texts me about going on a date to go for drinks soon. I replied I was interested and then we made plans. The next day I was doing nothing so I Googled him. I was shocked to see that he has had a couple of arrests for heroin possession and larceny over a 10 year period. The two towns he has told me he lived in, the name, and his age all match up so I'm certain it is him! Obviously, I want to cut ties immediately. In my previous texts he talked about how he can't wait to see me again and I texted "me too". How do I break the date and all contact with him?