I'm sorry that you are going through this situation with your DH. It is best to stick with the original plan. My mom got diagnosed with cancer when I was a junior in college. She wanted me to continue on with my education. I did worry about her but had the support of a lot of friends at college.
When it was my daughter's turn to go away to college, I was having some medical issues. We never even considered that she wouldn't go. She had to have her opportunity to further her education.

Try to find topics that you have in common. Talk about the company you work for or the conference you will have attended. Breathing exercises can help when you get nervous. Hope you can relax and be yourself.

Have him contact the college and see what his options are at this point. If he makes a lot of money, he can pay you back for any money that you will lose from a deposit or any payments you have already made.

I am sorry that your husband is struggling with depression for so long and has not made much progress over the years. Have you considered going to counseling for yourself so that you can talk to someone about how it effects your life? He has to come up with coping methods to deal with whatever is bothering him. Does he have any hobbies? Eating healthy, getting regular exercise and doing something creative can all help with depression. I hope you have some coping methods to deal with the situation. Your gratitude journal suggestion was a good one or drawing or painting. I like to walk and take pictures of nature outside. Keep looking for an answer.

When the kids are little, we make all the decisions, and as they get older we are not with them all the time so that they have to make decisions on their own. An example would be who they want to eat lunch with or what activities they are interested in. I will offer activities that we can afford and fit into our current schedule. We can make suggestions as to what friends we like them to invite over or what activities they would be good at. I try to give choices when I think it is right for their age. I do not give my children their way when it comes to clothes because I am paying for it. Another area where I am stricter is allowing tweens to be on their own too early. Parenting is not easy and it is hard because I don't always agree with what other parents do but I have to stand my ground and stick to my decision. It is good to talk these issues out with your child ahead of time so that they know where you stand and they can be prepared for your reaction.