Boyfriend Mad I Won’t Move In

[Anonymous]

I’ve been with my boyfriend for six months. He brought up us becoming more serious with me moving in and getting engaged. He said he knew early on I was it for him and he doesn’t want to wait. I told him I loved him but I want to wait. I told him the reasons why and he said he understood. Lately he’s now been acting very distant and not as affectionate. We also have not had sex in a week. I don’t know how to fix this.

[Anonymous]

What were your reasons why?

[Anonymous]

Six months? LOL, anyone who wants to move in and start talking about marriage after ONLY six months is crazy. I had college relationships 3x longer! Seriously, you need to date someone for AT LEAST 1.5-2 YEARS before thinking of marriage. Why? Because six months is still the BS "have sex everyday" and "show your best side" phase a relationship. After a year, that crap passes and you see the REAL person. Then you decide.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Six months? LOL, anyone who wants to move in and start talking about marriage after ONLY six months is crazy. I had college relationships 3x longer! Seriously, you need to date someone for AT LEAST 1.5-2 YEARS before thinking of marriage. Why? Because six months is still the BS "have sex everyday" and "show your best side" phase a relationship. After a year, that crap passes and you see the REAL person. Then you decide.

I don't agree with this at all. A lot can depend on the age when meeting someone. And the arbitrary dating for 2 years before talking marriage trips so many people up.

It's not wrong OP would like to wait either/

[Anonymous]

He’s not the one for you if this is his reaction to you not wanting to rush the relationship.

[Anonymous]

How old are the two of you?

[Anonymous]

Make him an ex. That will fix everything.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:What were your reasons why?

Are you going to answer this OP?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:What were your reasons why?

Yeah his reaction is probably more about the reasons and not the general idea that you don’t want to.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Six months? LOL, anyone who wants to move in and start talking about marriage after ONLY six months is crazy. I had college relationships 3x longer! Seriously, you need to date someone for AT LEAST 1.5-2 YEARS before thinking of marriage. Why? Because six months is still the BS "have sex everyday" and "show your best side" phase a relationship. After a year, that crap passes and you see the REAL person. Then you decide.

I don't agree with this at all. A lot can depend on the age when meeting someone. And the arbitrary dating for 2 years before talking marriage trips so many people up.

It's not wrong OP would like to wait either/

At what age does it makes sense that two people know each other well enough IN SIX MONTHS OF DATING to start talking about marriage? That's fantasy talk. Also, if it's a serious relationship there is zero need to rush into getting married. Six month is half a year - HALF A YEAR!!! Society today is just too impatient. When I was younger a "long term" relationship was closer to a year...not six months. Doesn't matter if you're age 20 or 50. Six months is not enough time to really know someone. Not to the point where you know the REAL person. Not the "show the best side" person.

Also, I agree with OP. She should wait because six months is way too short. Unless this guy is insecure or something, there is no issue of waiting. Again, six months is nothing for dating.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Six months? LOL, anyone who wants to move in and start talking about marriage after ONLY six months is crazy. I had college relationships 3x longer! Seriously, you need to date someone for AT LEAST 1.5-2 YEARS before thinking of marriage. Why? Because six months is still the BS "have sex everyday" and "show your best side" phase a relationship. After a year, that crap passes and you see the REAL person. Then you decide.

I don't agree with this at all. A lot can depend on the age when meeting someone. And the arbitrary dating for 2 years before talking marriage trips so many people up.

It's not wrong OP would like to wait either/

At what age does it makes sense that two people know each other well enough IN SIX MONTHS OF DATING to start talking about marriage? That's fantasy talk. Also, if it's a serious relationship there is zero need to rush into getting married. Six month is half a year - HALF A YEAR!!! Society today is just too impatient. When I was younger a "long term" relationship was closer to a year...not six months. Doesn't matter if you're age 20 or 50. Six months is not enough time to really know someone. Not to the point where you know the REAL person. Not the "show the best side" person.

Also, I agree with OP. She should wait because six months is way too short. Unless this guy is insecure or something, there is no issue of waiting. Again, six months is nothing for dating.

Not so crazy if both parties are over 35. I disagree with you. Continuing to reply to me and typing in caps is not going to change that.

[Anonymous]

It was infatuation, not love.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What were your reasons why?

Yeah his reaction is probably more about the reasons and not the general idea that you don’t want to.

Exactly. There's a big difference between I love you, but I' d like us to wait to get to know each other a little better and I love you and I want us each to have $60,000 in savings before moving in.. The reasons and the delivery matter.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:What were your reasons why?

OP here. Past relationship. I spent a year with my ex. I moved in at 6 months with him and we planned to get married. I thought I knew him very well, but engagement never came, and I started to see more things about him I didn’t like that I never saw before. I feel like you can really never know someone in that short amount of time. Lust blinds you for that first 6-12 months. This has nothing to do with my feelings. It does not mean I don’t see a future with him and that I don’t love him. Why rush such a big decision that is meant to last a lifetime? So many people rush and then end up divorced. I don’t want to be one of them.

I asked him why he was becoming distant today and he said he’s not sure I love him, and he doesn’t want to get hurt. He explained that me rejecting him told him that I’m not really in love with him, and he is protecting himself from getting any closer to me.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Six months? LOL, anyone who wants to move in and start talking about marriage after ONLY six months is crazy. I had college relationships 3x longer! Seriously, you need to date someone for AT LEAST 1.5-2 YEARS before thinking of marriage. Why? Because six months is still the BS "have sex everyday" and "show your best side" phase a relationship. After a year, that crap passes and you see the REAL person. Then you decide.

I don't agree with this at all. A lot can depend on the age when meeting someone. And the arbitrary dating for 2 years before talking marriage trips so many people up.

It's not wrong OP would like to wait either/

At what age does it makes sense that two people know each other well enough IN SIX MONTHS OF DATING to start talking about marriage? That's fantasy talk. Also, if it's a serious relationship there is zero need to rush into getting married. Six month is half a year - HALF A YEAR!!! Society today is just too impatient. When I was younger a "long term" relationship was closer to a year...not six months. Doesn't matter if you're age 20 or 50. Six months is not enough time to really know someone. Not to the point where you know the REAL person. Not the "show the best side" person.

Also, I agree with OP. She should wait because six months is way too short. Unless this guy is insecure or something, there is no issue of waiting. Again, six months is nothing for dating.

Not so crazy if both parties are over 35. I disagree with you. Continuing to reply to me and typing in caps is not going to change that.

Good to know you think people over 35 years of age can make life altering decisions in the span of only six months.

Got it. Good luck with that.