Wedding Judgement
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Anonymous
| My fiancé and I decided to move our “big” wedding from October 2021 to October 2022. October 2021 we will do a small church ceremony with just our parents. Our reasoning is we want to completely bypass all the covid concerns when have our big celebration, we will do the “big ceremony and reception” in 2022. The big day is a “big deal” to us, we are renting a B and B for 3 days and the special times with family and friends who live scattered across the US is important to us. Tonight my brother and Dad were questioning us and asking if we thought we pushed the wedding back too far and why don’t we just do something small and save money. I’m so tired of hearing critiques about our decision, it makes me feel like we made a bad decision. But it’s our life and it’s the decision we want. I’m bummed people aren’t excited for us and just want to question our timing. Most of our wedding party thought it was a good decision. My best friend has rescheduled her wedding 3x in 2020/2021. We did not want that to be us? How do we hold on to our joy in this difficult time and with criticism? |
Anonymous
| Your dad and brother asked some questions. I think they are legitimate ones. Yet here you are making it seem as if everyone is out to get you and rob you of any joy in your life. Stop being so dramatic. Your dad and brother care about you. People can question others without it being an indictment on their character and judgment. |
Anonymous
| I think your new plan is fine. Just stick with it if that is what you want |
Anonymous
| Do what you want. There is no right or wrong. But people asking questions is fine. |
Anonymous
|
BTW, I went through a similar situation with my own wedding, which was complicated by my MIL's sudden death and pushed back four months, with a change of venue, and I was visibly pregnant at the wedding. My best friend and "bridesmaid," her own wedding had been cancelled because her dad was having chemo and couldn't be around crowds. She opted for a big reception a year later and a courthouse ceremony for the time being.
Just do what you feel is best, OP. There are many ways to put on a wedding and they are all celebrations. |
Anonymous
| October ‘21 will be your wedding. Whatever you do the following year is a party, not a wedding, because you will already be married. |
Anonymous
+1 |
Anonymous
|
When it comes to weddings, everyone always has unwanted opinions op. I would try not to sweat it. I had same experience this year as I moved my big celebration from this summer to next summer but still did a small ceremony this summer.
You can’t win — if they are helping pay, offer to give them their money back if you can afford it. |
Anonymous
2022 will still be the wedding celebration. Stop with the semantics. |
Anonymous
| It’s asking a lot for people to be “excited” about something happening in Oct 2022. That’s still so far away. They’ll be happy for you as the date draws closer. I think their questions were reasonable and you can answer without feeling attacked. |
Anonymous
| I think that asking people to go to a B&B for three dats us asking a lot. Have a party one night. Not a year after you get married. |
Anonymous
| My family member is doing a similar plan to yours. Postponed big celebration from September, 2020 to early 2022. Will have a court house wedding on original date with parents only. They would like to start a family right away. This is a destination wedding celebration for 2022. I must admit I don’t have same enthusiasm for flying to celebration as I did for original wedding. I know I do not have to attend and I may still attend, but the idea of spending a few thousand dollars for plane fare and hotel for a party seems anticlimactic. They will already will have been married for over a year and maybe even have a child. These are just my thoughts and I would never voice to anyone. Love the bride and groom. |
Anonymous
Yeah I’d be sending my regrets to that. Egads |
Anonymous
|
I mean... it's a legitimate question. They're wondering if it's the best use of your money. Obviously it's your decision and you can tell them as much.
Also, I'm betting they are thinking this second event is an expensive party, not a wedding... they will have already participated in a wedding for you and by the time the second party rolls around, you'll already have been married for a year. It's a celebration of your marriage, but not a wedding. Just tell them the money is not an object and it's very important to you to celebrate this way. They sound caring and hopefully they will support you. |
Anonymous
Same here. |