I want to get rid of our dog

[Anonymous]

I’m sure I will get slack about this.

We had a dog for 13 years and she was great. We took a break after she died and I was so glad to not have a dog because we had 6 kids by that point. Then I started getting talked into it again and I got pressured by hubby and kids to rescue a puppy. I’ve regretted it every single day, that I didn’t put my foot down and say no. The puppy phase was a nightmare and I was seriously depressed during that time. She was difficult to crate train and manage to escape out of all crates, she’s destroyed so many spots in our yard and house. She’s 3.5 now and has calmed down a lot but she’s still so hard. She will still occasionally have accidents, she’s a fence jumper, barker, etc. It’s difficult to leave her the few times we go out of town. She gets very anxious being left and even taking her to grandparents with us, we can’t leave her alone for an outing or she will pee in every room of their house. We did training school and she practically failed. My other attempts at training have fallen short and frankly, I didn’t have the time or interest to devote to it and kids aren’t super capable of that. She’s like a high needs dog. In short, on top of life and kids and everything else going on, she stresses me out ALL THE TIME and I have fantasies of getting rid of her.

The issue I have is guilt. My husband is happy to get rid of her if I say yes. But I know one kid will probably never forgive me. A few others will be upset. So I either deal with it and accept it as my sacrifice and mistake or I disappoint my kids. And if we can’t keep her, who will? I doubt anyone else is going to be willing to take her with all of her quirks and needs. She actually really loves people but she’s so high needs. We would have to contact our rescue group and I just don’t see how they can find a new home for her.

[Anonymous]

What ages are your 6 kids?

I think 6 kids plus a high needs dog is a lot. The dog might be better off in a home with people who can devote a lot of time to it.

[Anonymous]

What breed is she? Can you find a rescue that will take her?

[Anonymous]

Dog sounds like it has ADHD and needs a military style dog trainer, like a super nanny for dogs .

[Anonymous]

Find the dog a better situation. Tell the kids the dog ran away.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Find the dog a better situation. Tell the kids the dog ran away.

They will know.

Op, you shouldn’t be traveling anyway. Have kids take dog on multiple walks a day.

[Anonymous]

OP here. Our kids are 7-16. She’s a mix breed, we don’t really know. We got her from a rescue and signed a contract and I think we have to contact them. Can’t just get rid of her randomly.

Not talking about travel now...but trips in the past that we can’t take her. I’m assuming you mean not traveling because of covid, not because of her.

ADHD is it. She probably needs more training than we have had the money for.

[Anonymous]

How much work is your family doing? If you are doing the majority of the care, let them know they can step up or rehome.

[Anonymous]

The rescue you got her from should provide some resources, like training tips, etc. I'd contact them first.

Then, I'd assign each kid a 3 hour duty watch each day.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:How much work is your family doing? If you are doing the majority of the care, let them know they can step up or rehome.

We have talked about that. The one kid who would be upset does help a lot. The other kids don’t really care to help because they would be fine either way. I guess part of my annoyance is we’ve dealt with it for 3+ years so why can’t I keep dealing with it? Lots of people have annoying dogs and deal. But I fantasize about letting her run away, which she would because she’s a runner. But I know someone would find her or she’d find her way back. Haha kidding but I have thought about having my husband tell the rescue that it’s affecting my mental health. I guess my tolerance is much lower and I struggle with anxiety so I just can’t deal with the constant inconvenience.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here. Our kids are 7-16. She’s a mix breed, we don’t really know. We got her from a rescue and signed a contract and I think we have to contact them. Can’t just get rid of her randomly.

Not talking about travel now...but trips in the past that we can’t take her. I’m assuming you mean not traveling because of covid, not because of her.

ADHD is it. She probably needs more training than we have had the money for.

Some dogs are just need way more interaction and stimulation... SO MUCH of it. She may also have separation anxiety.

[Anonymous]

Life is too short to live like this for 10 more years. I would rehome.

[Anonymous]

I read the contract we signed recently and it seems legally binding that we have to contact them about rehoming. And I’m not sure if they will expect us to try anything else before helping us. And I don’t really know what to tell them. She’s not aggressive or bitten anyone.

[Anonymous]

Oh no, poor OP. Don't torture yourself like this.

Talk to your kids and lay it out for them. Say you're are the end of your rope taking care of the dog and them. Either someone steps up and the dog goes away and they can't blame you.

[Anonymous]

Well, my anxious, high needs cat is now on Prozac and that has transformed her into a nice kitty, so maybe talk to your vet about that?

(I know this cements my status as a crazy cat lady, but it really has stopped the scratching, howling, and inappropriate peeing).