Neighbors daughter peed on my couch :(

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I wouldn’t say anything. I don’t see the point.

Honestly has your couch never been peed on or puked on before? Just clean it and air out the room.

Next time the girl is over (if you have her again- your choice of course) remind her to use the restroom regularly.

Just the type of stuff that happens with small kids IMO

NP here. I have two kids ages 9 and 12, and neither of them has ever peed or puked on a couch. I don't think this is that unusual. I cannot believe that a) a six year old peed on a couch and b) said nothing to anyone. Appalling.

Mom of 3 and I agree that this is pretty strange. No pee or puke on couches here.

Same here. I have 3 young children, so I’m no stranger to cleaning up messes. That said, I cannot believe someone would get to the point where pee and puke on a couch is considered normal? That’s bizarre.

My oldest child is 5 years. She has never peed on my couch and neither have any of her friends. I can’t imagine a situation where a kid makes that big of a mess and doesn’t tell anyone. This is basic hygiene!!!

An expert with toddler kids . Pity having 3 kids did not give you more empathy. Mine have never peed on couch either but I would never judge a parent or child having this embarrassing issue. By the grace of God you go your kids do not have issues so far.

A 5 year old is not a toddler...

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don’t understand all the “say nothings.” I would definitely want to know if one of my kids had a substantial accident all over someone’s couch.

Same! "Hi, Julia's had two accidents at my house this week. Since I'm sure you deal with this often, do you have any suggestions for my couch? Also, do you want to send some pull-ups she can wear while she's here, or ... what has your ped or the urologist said is the best way to handle this?"

+1

Ugh, no. That sounds completelty obnoxious. Just remind her to use the bathroom or keep her on hard surfaces or outside. This shouldn't be that big of a deal.

Wait, so you would hide this from the girl’s parents???

[Anonymous]

My son in the past year had bathroom issues and UTIs that after multiple tests were traced to something more than just an infection. So I would say something to the parents, but frame it like you're asking for help: "You mentioned Larla had accidents, and she had one here last week, what can I do to help her? Do you want to leave some clothes here just in case it happens again?" And if it does happen again, suggest seeing a doctor because lack of control can indicate UTIs and other issues.

[Anonymous]

Of course you mention it at pick up time. I'd find it weird if my child came home wet or with pee smelling clothes and you DIDN'T say anything. That would be more embarrassing for me, and frankly I'd worry about our relationship and sharing childcare in the future if you can't just be chill and open about things like this.

Since that ship has sailed but you are planning on hosting again, just say, "hey, I forgot to mention it, but Larla had an accident yesterday. Do you have tips for reminding her to go throughout the day? Can you send a spare outfit next time just in case. Thanks!"

[Anonymous]

Our daughter has struggled for years with constipation and used to have frequent accidents as a result. I certainly would want another parent to tell me if she peed on their couch, especially if it is making them doubt their decision to have our children spend time together.

Kids who are constipated often don't feel that they need to use the bathroom, and it comes out unexpectedly. If this happens often, the kid might feel ashamed to admit it to you.

You might suggest to the other mom that there are options out there. First, she could get an x-ray of the girl's colon. If it shows severe constipation, there are plenty of options for clearing things up and staying regular.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:What the heck is with all these don’t tel the parents responses?!?! Makes no sense. Schools send home a letter if a child has an accident so you know. Similar should
Happen here

Some schools send a letter. Other schools just send the soiled clothing.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Why is no one mentioning the fact that a 6 year old is pering everywhere. There's a much larger issue here that needs to be addressed. A very occasional accident...sure! On floors and couches...in other people's homes, and the parents acknowledge this as something that "happens?"

No.

Several of us have pointed out that it happens, and as one PP stated, several hospitals are studying why.

There’s no answer now. The child just has to grow out of it, and sometimes it doesn’t happen until puberty.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have a child who still accidents past the age of 6. First, while a small percentage, this issue is more common than you realize. So the posters who are being rude have no idea. The mom gave a warning, so clearly she is aware. We have taken my child to many specialists, who do not want her back in pullups. It is harder to have the awareness of being wet or dry when in a pull up. There are entire clinics at some of the big hospitals dedicated to this exact issue. For some children, the issue does not resolve until puberty, as a pp said. The child did not say anything because they were either too embarrassed ( a common reaction for kids like this) or with small accidents they really are sometimes unaware (neurologically the need to go and fact they went does not always register- also not uncommon for someone who has accidents past age 5).

As a parent of a child like this, I probably would not have started a pod without giving the host mom more guidance. However, shaming the child or talking to the parent like they have no idea is not right either. Your options, OP, are you can either say nothing, but since you are starting a pod this may happen again. Or, you can say "Larla had an accident our house the other day. I know you had mentioned this happens sometimes. Since we will be spending a lot of time together in this Pod, do you have any suggestions of what I can do help? I am happy to give bathroom reminders every so often or keep a change of clothes for her at our house." Both the girl and the mom are probably already feeling badly about this issue in general.

I want to emphasize- This issue is not one of bad parenting or a kid who is "not potty trained" or being bad. More kids than you realize really do have this issue. I have literally cried over this with my child and done everything I possibly can, but I still have a 9 year old with accidents.

I'd be ok if the parents were taking steps with Drs, but this doesn't seem to be the case. I think the way you suggest bringing it up works. It does have to be brought up. It's either a medical issue that needs to be addressed, or a psychological issue that also needs to be addressed, or even an abuse issue that needs to be looked into ( no PP, I am not insinuating that your daughter has an abuse issue.)

Regardless, let's not tiptoe around it without problem solving. And no, we don't ever need to enbarrass the child, but let's get this worked on.

I highly doubt it that it’s being withheld from the doctor. Ime, every parent and child who deal with late accidents want it resolved, but there are no answers.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why is no one mentioning the fact that a 6 year old is pering everywhere. There's a much larger issue here that needs to be addressed. A very occasional accident...sure! On floors and couches...in other people's homes, and the parents acknowledge this as something that "happens?"

No.

Several of us have pointed out that it happens, and as one PP stated, several hospitals are studying why.

There’s no answer now. The child just has to grow out of it, and sometimes it doesn’t happen until puberty.

A girl or boy peeing themselves while they're awake until they're 12 or 13 is the definition of abnormal.

OP should say something to the parents and maybe even mention hosting all pods at their house or in an outdoor setting if this was happening.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don’t understand all the “say nothings.” I would definitely want to know if one of my kids had a substantial accident all over someone’s couch.

It’s an embarrassing situation and nothing good can be gained by mentioning it. The little girl was obviously too embarrassed to say anything. Days later what can the parents possibly do except pay for a new couch or cleaning? I think when you have kids over at your house there are some risks in accidents, whether it’s a broken toy or in this case you’re in on a couch. It was clearly an accident I would never say anything. My opinion would change if it was deliberate and this child was difficult and wouldn’t listen to adults.

Definitely try the natures miracle stuff. It really works.Definitely try the natures miracle stuff. It really works

.

Two days in a row isn't an accident!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My Next door neighbors have a 6 year old daughter and she and my 6 year old son have been playing quite a bit outside during quarantine. We formed a pod with this family and two other family’s to oversee elearning next school year. Since we formed the pod we have allowed our kids to play together more, including inside. Over the weekend I noticed the girl definitely had an accident since her shorts were wet over her bottom. The next day we noticed our living room couch was really wet, all the way through the cushions to the bottom of the couch. Since then it has started reeling of urine. I have a carpet cleaning thing similar to something you can rent at the grocery store, and I used it to clean the couch but it still smells. I bought a few special cleaners meant to remove pet urine and I will use those and hopefully the smell will go away. I am debating if I should say anything to my neighbors. They have mentioned that she tends to have accidents. I don’t want to embarrass her or make it weird with them, but I’m also weary now that this girl is going to be in my house when we start the pod during g the school year. Any thoughts on whether I should say anything? Also tips on how to get rid of the smell would be appreciated!

Peeing on couches is a reason pods are a bad idea

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why is no one mentioning the fact that a 6 year old is pering everywhere. There's a much larger issue here that needs to be addressed. A very occasional accident...sure! On floors and couches...in other people's homes, and the parents acknowledge this as something that "happens?"

No.

Several of us have pointed out that it happens, and as one PP stated, several hospitals are studying why.

There’s no answer now. The child just has to grow out of it, and sometimes it doesn’t happen until puberty.

A girl or boy peeing themselves while they're awake until they're 12 or 13 is the definition of abnormal.

OP should say something to the parents and maybe even mention hosting all pods at their house or in an outdoor setting if this was happening.

Yet there are entire divisions at Johns Hopkins and Children's Hospitals dedicated to this exact issue! And for many kids it doesn't resolve until puberty. For others, it's constipation, but can take years to resolve. Just because you are unaware of kids with this issue, does not mean it does not exist. Of course it is not most kids, but the nasty tone of your post in insulting to many of us who have children with this issue, who have seen doctors and psychologists with little improvement. My child does not want to "pee herself until she is 12." I am not a negligent parent. It is a health issue like many others- maybe you could use a more compassionate tone. If OP doesn't want to deal with this fine, but the nastiness in responses is uncalled for.

[Anonymous]

I was the mom whose 2.5 yr old peed on a friend's really nice leather couch. I felt soooo badly, and yes, I offered to pay for the cleaning. My older kid also vomitted at someone else's house. Again, I felt terrible.

Did the parent come pick the kid up? You could text the parent to let them know that the kid had an accident on the couch in case they also wanted to bring some clean clothes.

[Anonymous]

5/6 yr olds have peeing accidents all the time. Ask a k-er teacher.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I wouldn’t say anything. I don’t see the point.

Honestly has your couch never been peed on or puked on before? Just clean it and air out the room.

Next time the girl is over (if you have her again- your choice of course) remind her to use the restroom regularly.

Just the type of stuff that happens with small kids IMO

WTF??? No, my couch has never been peed on before! It hasn’t been puked on either! This is not normal!!!

- mom of 3 kids

You're the mom who didn't let potty trained toddlers in the living room/on any furniture, aren't you?

My seven year old had the flu last year, she was laying on the couch on top of a blanket and with a bucket next to her in case she threw up. Yet she was so exhausted that she couldn't get up to pee and had an accident while laying on the couch. It happens. No, it's not normal, but it does happen and it doesn't warrant a "WTF???" reaction from a crazy OCD person like you.