3rd Grade DD Has a Pot Belly

[Anonymous]

Your 9 year old should hear NOTHING about what you think about her waist.

Try spending more active time with her. Bike rides, hiking, going on a jog together. But make it about doing something fun together, don't you say ONE WORD about her weight.

Stop buying junk food, if she eats lots of healthy food that's not the issue. But again, don't say ONE WORD to her about this.

[Anonymous]

Don’t mention her waistline/belly. But don’t ignore it either. Obese children are high risk for lifelong obesity.

Take your child back to the pediatrician. She is your child and is therefore your responsibility as well as your wife’s.

Teach your daughter that she is smaller than her older brother and therefore cannot eat as much as him until she is his size.

Say no when she wants seconds when she has had enough. Say no when she wants junk food. Say no when she wants soda or candy. (Obviously let her have treats occasionally.) she is still too young to decide on her portions and diet.

And get her moving.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Wonder if folks realize that if everyone ate healthfully-- in portions appropriate to their genuine appetites-- and exercised frequently... there would still be a non-zero percentage of fat people? By definition, 5 percent of people will be in the 95th percentile for weight, and 10 percent in the 90th, etc., even if they are doing everything "right."

I don't know why people can accept that there are skinny people who eat nothing but truckloads of junk food and not the opposite. Yeah, yeah, yeah, lots of fat people do have unhealthy habits-- and maybe more of them do than skinny people. But some people are designed to be very healthy-- and chubby, or even fat!

This is not true. We could certainly have a nation of people with normal BMIs. Someone will always be in the 95th%tile and someone will always be in the 5th. But they all could have normal BMIs and not be overweight.

[Anonymous]

Around 9-10, my mother told me I looked pregnant. She would make me do sit ups after dinner and began weighing me semi regularly. And a relative that would call me “chubs” Needless to say this was terrible for my self esteem and caused food/body issues that stayed with me into adulthood.

It is so much healthier to have a child/teen with some extra pounds that loves themselves than to have a thin child with an eating disorder.

Some great advice already given about lifestyle changes you can make, but say NOTHING about her body shape/size unless it is positive. And for the love of God, do not let relatives give her terrible nicknames.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Around 9-10, my mother told me I looked pregnant. She would make me do sit ups after dinner and began weighing me semi regularly. And a relative that would call me “chubs” Needless to say this was terrible for my self esteem and caused food/body issues that stayed with me into adulthood.

It is so much healthier to have a child/teen with some extra pounds that loves themselves than to have a thin child with an eating disorder.

Some great advice already given about lifestyle changes you can make, but say NOTHING about her body shape/size unless it is positive. And for the love of God, do not let relatives give her terrible nicknames.

I have a relative that to this day dislikes her mother and family because she was put on a diet and watched like a hawk during a normal pre growth plump up.

It's best to make overall to make lifestyle changes for the whole family and not say much about it. Children will remember what you teach them.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Don’t mention her waistline/belly. But don’t ignore it either. Obese children are high risk for lifelong obesity.

Take your child back to the pediatrician. She is your child and is therefore your responsibility as well as your wife’s.

Teach your daughter that she is smaller than her older brother and therefore cannot eat as much as him until she is his size.

Say no when she wants seconds when she has had enough. Say no when she wants junk food. Say no when she wants soda or candy. (Obviously let her have treats occasionally.) she is still too young to decide on her portions and diet.

And get her moving.

NO

Except for the getting her moving advice.

[Anonymous]

Yes. Not to lose it, but you can tell her to stop eating as much as she is getting fat.

[Anonymous]

OP I started a thread about elementary weight concerns which were “cured” by following our pediatrician’s recommendations to the letter. Lots of people are insane about weight issues. Ignore them. There are clear, evidence-based best practices.

[Anonymous]

Why “cured”? Attention seeking?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Why “cured”? Attention seeking?

Maybe you didn't read that thread but you definitely fit right in.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Why “cured”? Attention seeking?

Because she no longer qualified for the medical diagnosis that prompted the intervention.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I was that 9 year old (with a skinny sister)

It’s a hard thing to navigate. My parents had really good intentions, though I have bad memories of my mom asking all the time if I was “sure I needed that third cookie.” She also encouraged an older cousin to take me running. And I remember a matter of fact conversation with my pediatrician. In the end though, it worked out. I’ve never been a skinny person but at 40 am reasonably fit and at the high end of weight for my height (always have been) but not overweight and have always had a pretty healthy body image at least compared to a lot of women I know.

The cookie comments may or may not have been helpful. Keeping junk out of the house, serving healthy foods (having fruit or veggies cut up and easy to access), encouraging activity, and otherwise raising me as a capable and confident kid all helped.

I mean...nobody needs a third cookie. It’s not wrong to tell a child “Let’s have a treat after dinner! Would you like one cookie or one lollipop?” Perhaps the error is in making 2 cookies the norm in the first place, where 3 is “just one more”.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why “cured”? Attention seeking?

Maybe you didn't read that thread but you definitely fit right in.

+1

[Anonymous]

What I find is parents feed their children adult portions. What do you expect?

[Anonymous]

You should pre portion everyone’s meal plates (the portions are not the same for an adult, an athletic teenager, a young girl etc) and serve the plate of food to each individual. Family style serving is a major issue in over eating. If seconds are asked, give them fruit and water. If they are still not full, ask them to wait 60-90 minutes and if they are still hungry give them a cheese stick or a handful of nuts. I do this for my kids once I saw them gaining substantial weight and it fixed the issue in 2 months. We have continued this for over 2 plus years and it’s going strong.