DC wants to withdraw from magnet program

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My 6th grade girl also withdrew from a magnet, for the same reasons. We made her stick it out for a semester. By that point I agreed that it was better to go back to our assigned middle school (which DCUM looks down upon immensely).

A semester, meaning the end of 6th, or after Christmas?
Thanks for sharing.

After Christmas.

And to PP, I was sad about it, but she was sad going there every day. She is normally upbeat and peppy, but it was too much of a change for her. She's doing well at her home school. She has good grades, and a good peer group (mostly the same girls she was friends with in elementary).

[Anonymous]

OP just know MCPS is all about inertia. They always advise wait. But the reality usually is the problems you face won't go away. You will get used to them and then the costs of changing your direction will grow as you have spent time learning a new system, making a few contacts. Same for DC. Maybe that's an ok outcome. But it is intentional on the part of the system (MCPS) because, in no small part, it's easier for the system. Is that an ok outcome for a particular family? Often no. btdt.

[Anonymous]

Its hard enough for middle schoolers to adjust to their home school. Adding in a long bus ride cuts into sleep time at the exact time when many of them are going through growth spurts and need more sleep. Hormone changes from puberty add another layer of stress.

Landing in a rough school is no picnic for many kids. Kids do not get much of ay time to socialize during the academic classes. Once they get into more project work there will be more chances to interact socially in class but lunch and PE tend to be the only time when kid get to talk with each other. If she is being bullied on top of being around kids who play and talk "rough" at lunch and PE then I can see why she is struggling.

You can't assume that the teachers or administrators can get the other kids to behave. They can't and won't. The only thing that can change is that your daughter can get tougher and tan up to the bullies are on her on and learn to ignore or join in with the other kids. My oldest is very confident and has a do not mess with me attitude. She would be fine . My youngest would fall apart in a second.

[Anonymous]

Let her go back to home school. I’d rather my kid have a positive experience at “regular” home school than suffer from anxiety at a magnet.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm so sorry your child has been having troubles at her magnet school. Since she likes the classes, you might want to talk with the school counselor before you withdraw. The counselor might have some ideas on ways your child can find friends and integrate into the school.

I think it's great that you're being proactive on this and not letting it fester. I hope things get better soon for your daughter and that she finds happiness at whatever school she decides on.

Agree with this advice.
There are always a couple of students who leave typically at the end of 6th grade but if your child is miserable and knows she will be happier in her home school no need to wait. I wonder if it is worth having her spend a day shadowing in her home middle school if that can be arranged.
Please make sure the magnet coordinator and the Principal are aware of the situation for the sake of the other children in the school.
Also don’t let this experience dissuade her from considering a high school Magnet program. If she is accepted into one she can request to shadow a student for a few hours so she gets a sense of how stimulating, safe and well run the school is.
Good luck to your child

I am the PP. if this is Eastern MS please please report this to the principal even if you leave. Also know that for some reason the behavioral problems you observe at Eastern are largely absent at Blair high school so don’t rule out a Magnet HS without shadowing first

That is a straight up lie.

I think it is partly true.Many of the non-magnet students who were behavior issues at Eastern chose to go to Kennedy rather than Blair.

Lots of poor kids at eastern and lots of poor kids at Blair. Nobody chooses Kennedy

I teach there. There are kids who choose Kennedy.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm guessing that this is TPMS. TPMS and in general MCPS does a really bad with managing middle school behaviors. The behaviors at many schools, not just TPMS, can get very out of control. Its a combination of the age when kids are trying to act cool or tough for other kids and have low impulse control with very little oversight from teachers and admin. It doesn't help that there is not much outdoor time or breaks so PE and lunch tend to be lord of the flies. If your child is coming from a small elementary with mostly nerdy or quieter kids and then going into a huge schools with lots of kids acting out can be really hard.

Your home middle school is not going to be as well run and nurturing as your small elementary school was but it could be much better depending on the group of kids. It is far easier for admins/teachers to deal with a few kids acting out than deal with a large number acting act so it stays calmer. It may also help your DC if he or she has a larger set of friends in the home school.

I agree that high school is different. There are different problem but the pooping all over the bathroom, shrieking and cursing in the locker room and other gross middle school behaviors get replaced by other things that tend to stay more confined to different groups.

When my DC was in the TPMS Magnet, by the time the first quarter was over, she realized that lunch much better and more fun in her Science Teacher's classroom. There were many of her classmates with her there and she made a bunch of friends. I definitely say give it time. You are going to be hard pressed to find better MS teachers than they have in the TPMS magnet and if that can springboard to the Blair Magnet, it only gets better.

Your kid eats lunch in the science room?

[Anonymous]

We had a child leave HGC and it was the best decision. We made her wait until at least Thanksgiving (that was asked of all students.) The bus ride was insane. She wasn't able to be on the sports teams with her friends. The school she went to was horrible. It was just not a good fit. Most of the kids are introverts or don't socialize well. They are happier in that situation. But the kids with outside activities and a lot of friends from their old school? It is a tough switch and not worth it. 4 other kids left that year as well.

She decided not to apply to magnet for middle school and stay with her neighbors and friends. And luckily our home high school had a program within it and she graduated with an IB diploma and went on to a great college. And her friends from 1st grade? Still her closest friends today.

OP, let her move back to her home school.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm guessing that this is TPMS. TPMS and in general MCPS does a really bad with managing middle school behaviors. The behaviors at many schools, not just TPMS, can get very out of control. Its a combination of the age when kids are trying to act cool or tough for other kids and have low impulse control with very little oversight from teachers and admin. It doesn't help that there is not much outdoor time or breaks so PE and lunch tend to be lord of the flies. If your child is coming from a small elementary with mostly nerdy or quieter kids and then going into a huge schools with lots of kids acting out can be really hard.

Your home middle school is not going to be as well run and nurturing as your small elementary school was but it could be much better depending on the group of kids. It is far easier for admins/teachers to deal with a few kids acting out than deal with a large number acting act so it stays calmer. It may also help your DC if he or she has a larger set of friends in the home school.

I agree that high school is different. There are different problem but the pooping all over the bathroom, shrieking and cursing in the locker room and other gross middle school behaviors get replaced by other things that tend to stay more confined to different groups.

When my DC was in the TPMS Magnet, by the time the first quarter was over, she realized that lunch much better and more fun in her Science Teacher's classroom. There were many of her classmates with her there and she made a bunch of friends. I definitely say give it time. You are going to be hard pressed to find better MS teachers than they have in the TPMS magnet and if that can springboard to the Blair Magnet, it only gets better.

This is a parent talking. Not the kid

Wait, this is a website for parents to post? I had no idea.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm guessing that this is TPMS. TPMS and in general MCPS does a really bad with managing middle school behaviors. The behaviors at many schools, not just TPMS, can get very out of control. Its a combination of the age when kids are trying to act cool or tough for other kids and have low impulse control with very little oversight from teachers and admin. It doesn't help that there is not much outdoor time or breaks so PE and lunch tend to be lord of the flies. If your child is coming from a small elementary with mostly nerdy or quieter kids and then going into a huge schools with lots of kids acting out can be really hard.

Your home middle school is not going to be as well run and nurturing as your small elementary school was but it could be much better depending on the group of kids. It is far easier for admins/teachers to deal with a few kids acting out than deal with a large number acting act so it stays calmer. It may also help your DC if he or she has a larger set of friends in the home school.

I agree that high school is different. There are different problem but the pooping all over the bathroom, shrieking and cursing in the locker room and other gross middle school behaviors get replaced by other things that tend to stay more confined to different groups.

When my DC was in the TPMS Magnet, by the time the first quarter was over, she realized that lunch much better and more fun in her Science Teacher's classroom. There were many of her classmates with her there and she made a bunch of friends. I definitely say give it time. You are going to be hard pressed to find better MS teachers than they have in the TPMS magnet and if that can springboard to the Blair Magnet, it only gets better.

This is a parent talking. Not the kid

Wait, this is a website for parents to post? I had no idea.

The point being you idiot parents are pushing their kids based on this notion that TP has better teachers. It doesn’t.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Its hard enough for middle schoolers to adjust to their home school. Adding in a long bus ride cuts into sleep time at the exact time when many of them are going through growth spurts and need more sleep. Hormone changes from puberty add another layer of stress.

Landing in a rough school is no picnic for many kids. Kids do not get much of ay time to socialize during the academic classes. Once they get into more project work there will be more chances to interact socially in class but lunch and PE tend to be the only time when kid get to talk with each other. If she is being bullied on top of being around kids who play and talk "rough" at lunch and PE then I can see why she is struggling.

You can't assume that the teachers or administrators can get the other kids to behave. They can't and won't. The only thing that can change is that your daughter can get tougher and tan up to the bullies are on her on and learn to ignore or join in with the other kids. My oldest is very confident and has a do not mess with me attitude. She would be fine . My youngest would fall apart in a second.

This is key. And true at any MS, IME.

In reality, teachers and staff have very few ways to control students behavior and the kids know it.

[Anonymous]

OP, move them out. It is a terrible system anyway.

[Anonymous]

Mom is in her 80's. She had long commutes to private
schools from grade 2nd to 12 when her local public
were good.

She still complains about the commutes (70 years later)

Listen to your kid.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Mom is in her 80's. She had long commutes to private
schools from grade 2nd to 12 when her local public
were good.

She still complains about the commutes (70 years later)

Listen to your kid.

Let me guess: your mother never went to college.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm guessing that this is TPMS. TPMS and in general MCPS does a really bad with managing middle school behaviors. The behaviors at many schools, not just TPMS, can get very out of control. Its a combination of the age when kids are trying to act cool or tough for other kids and have low impulse control with very little oversight from teachers and admin. It doesn't help that there is not much outdoor time or breaks so PE and lunch tend to be lord of the flies. If your child is coming from a small elementary with mostly nerdy or quieter kids and then going into a huge schools with lots of kids acting out can be really hard.

Your home middle school is not going to be as well run and nurturing as your small elementary school was but it could be much better depending on the group of kids. It is far easier for admins/teachers to deal with a few kids acting out than deal with a large number acting act so it stays calmer. It may also help your DC if he or she has a larger set of friends in the home school.

I agree that high school is different. There are different problem but the pooping all over the bathroom, shrieking and cursing in the locker room and other gross middle school behaviors get replaced by other things that tend to stay more confined to different groups.

When my DC was in the TPMS Magnet, by the time the first quarter was over, she realized that lunch much better and more fun in her Science Teacher's classroom. There were many of her classmates with her there and she made a bunch of friends. I definitely say give it time. You are going to be hard pressed to find better MS teachers than they have in the TPMS magnet and if that can springboard to the Blair Magnet, it only gets better.

Your kid eats lunch in the science room?

Yes, in 7th grade, there is even a name for it "Goehring Lunch".

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Mom is in her 80's. She had long commutes to private
schools from grade 2nd to 12 when her local public
were good.

She still complains about the commutes (70 years later)

Listen to your kid.

Does she start every sentence with: "In my day...."?