DC wants to withdraw from magnet program

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP's child may be in one of the non-test in magnets like Parkland, Loiderman or Argyle.

If that's the case, get that child out of there quick. Those "feel good magnets" certainly aren't worth putting up with any nonsense (Eastern and TPMS are another story completely)

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Who was most motivated to apply to the magnet program - DC or parents? If parents, let DC go back to home school. They don't have the internal motivation to stick it out and figure out how to make it work. If they stay, they'll be miserable trying to satisfy parent wishes. If DC was the one who really wanted to apply, then have them stay at least through the semester, preferably until the end of the year. A lot of the challenge is simply middle school transition. But if they are highly motivated by the coursework and peers, they will figure out how to fit in and make friends.

-middle school magnet teacher (who has seen both types of kids)

It’s all parent led? The introverts will be introverts anywhere so they don’t care. It is the kids with friends and social systems that have the toughest time. Even harder if they go back to home high school.

I agree. Magnet middle schools are all pushed by parents. It's pretty sad they are willing to bus them across the county and be miserable, so they can brag and hope it gets them in a magnet high school

What's with all of the "busing across the county" rhetoric on DCUM? Bethesda to Silver Spring is not actually across the county.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Who was most motivated to apply to the magnet program - DC or parents? If parents, let DC go back to home school. They don't have the internal motivation to stick it out and figure out how to make it work. If they stay, they'll be miserable trying to satisfy parent wishes. If DC was the one who really wanted to apply, then have them stay at least through the semester, preferably until the end of the year. A lot of the challenge is simply middle school transition. But if they are highly motivated by the coursework and peers, they will figure out how to fit in and make friends.

-middle school magnet teacher (who has seen both types of kids)

It’s all parent led? The introverts will be introverts anywhere so they don’t care. It is the kids with friends and social systems that have the toughest time. Even harder if they go back to home high school.

I agree. Magnet middle schools are all pushed by parents. It's pretty sad they are willing to bus them across the county and be miserable, so they can brag and hope it gets them in a magnet high school

Have you attended a middle school magnet in MCPS? Have any of your children? Your post reeks of sour grapes. I hated school and would have gladly skipped any project that was optional, but my dc is that kid who gets excited about about being assigned a project. She actually wants to be challenged. She wants to acquire new skills. She wishes assignments were harder. She asks me to create assignments at home for her. She felt there should have been more homework in 5th grade. She resents the slow pace of the curriculum. She wants to have similar classmates so the pace doesn’t have to be slowed for any of them. There’s no longer an application process, but dd made it very clear that she wanted to attend a humanities magnet. I’m thrilled when either of my kids don’t have homework and I get grumpier and grumpier about homework and projects in the final weeks of the school year. I’m a little disappointed that I have to drive dd to her magnet bus stop early in the morning, after years of anticipating her walking with friends to our neighborhood middle school. DD is only in 6th grade and I’ve already casually mentioned that it would be great for her to attend our home high school, where AP classes can challenge her. DD has never had a tutor or taken a prep class. She’s not in the magnet because that’s what her parents chose.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP's child may be in one of the non-test in magnets like Parkland, Loiderman or Argyle.

If that's the case, get that child out of there quick. Those "feel good magnets" certainly aren't worth putting up with any nonsense (Eastern and TPMS are another story completely)

If you don't want your child to attend Parkland, Loiederman, or Argyle, all you have to do is say no. There, done.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If your child wants to leave, sooner is better. Especially if the main issue is social. You’ll want your son to make friends before going to Outdoor Ed at the new school.

I disagree. If I were the OP, I'd do what she's doing (get the administrators, teachers, and counselors involved) and allow the DC to revisit the decision at the end of the semester, but not before.

I have three kids -- 12th, 9th, 6th, and the younger two went to/are in a magnet MS, and experienced some of the issues described. But my senior, who was at the home middle school, also had some of the same issues. It's not like he had a place to bail to that he thought would be better. He eventually found his tribe -- but I will also note that the tribe shifted over middle school, and has again shifted throughout high school. Actually it should really be tribes, because they develop different groups that overlap or don't. I think the important thing for a kid to do is learn how to make friends and be a friend, not to acquire a friendship group that will be static throughout middle school and high school.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Who was most motivated to apply to the magnet program - DC or parents? If parents, let DC go back to home school. They don't have the internal motivation to stick it out and figure out how to make it work. If they stay, they'll be miserable trying to satisfy parent wishes. If DC was the one who really wanted to apply, then have them stay at least through the semester, preferably until the end of the year. A lot of the challenge is simply middle school transition. But if they are highly motivated by the coursework and peers, they will figure out how to fit in and make friends.

-middle school magnet teacher (who has seen both types of kids)

It’s all parent led? The introverts will be introverts anywhere so they don’t care. It is the kids with friends and social systems that have the toughest time. Even harder if they go back to home high school.

I agree. Magnet middle schools are all pushed by parents. It's pretty sad they are willing to bus them across the county and be miserable, so they can brag and hope it gets them in a magnet high school

Have you attended a middle school magnet in MCPS? Have any of your children? Your post reeks of sour grapes. I hated school and would have gladly skipped any project that was optional, but my dc is that kid who gets excited about about being assigned a project. She actually wants to be challenged. She wants to acquire new skills. She wishes assignments were harder. She asks me to create assignments at home for her. She felt there should have been more homework in 5th grade. She resents the slow pace of the curriculum. She wants to have similar classmates so the pace doesn’t have to be slowed for any of them. There’s no longer an application process, but dd made it very clear that she wanted to attend a humanities magnet. I’m thrilled when either of my kids don’t have homework and I get grumpier and grumpier about homework and projects in the final weeks of the school year. I’m a little disappointed that I have to drive dd to her magnet bus stop early in the morning, after years of anticipating her walking with friends to our neighborhood middle school. DD is only in 6th grade and I’ve already casually mentioned that it would be great for her to attend our home high school, where AP classes can challenge her. DD has never had a tutor or taken a prep class. She’s not in the magnet because that’s what her parents chose.

This is pretty much our family too. Although we are fortunate to have a short commute.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Who was most motivated to apply to the magnet program - DC or parents? If parents, let DC go back to home school. They don't have the internal motivation to stick it out and figure out how to make it work. If they stay, they'll be miserable trying to satisfy parent wishes. If DC was the one who really wanted to apply, then have them stay at least through the semester, preferably until the end of the year. A lot of the challenge is simply middle school transition. But if they are highly motivated by the coursework and peers, they will figure out how to fit in and make friends.

-middle school magnet teacher (who has seen both types of kids)

It’s all parent led? The introverts will be introverts anywhere so they don’t care. It is the kids with friends and social systems that have the toughest time. Even harder if they go back to home high school.

I agree. Magnet middle schools are all pushed by parents. It's pretty sad they are willing to bus them across the county and be miserable, so they can brag and hope it gets them in a magnet high school

Have you attended a middle school magnet in MCPS? Have any of your children? Your post reeks of sour grapes. I hated school and would have gladly skipped any project that was optional, but my dc is that kid who gets excited about about being assigned a project. She actually wants to be challenged. She wants to acquire new skills. She wishes assignments were harder. She asks me to create assignments at home for her. She felt there should have been more homework in 5th grade. She resents the slow pace of the curriculum. She wants to have similar classmates so the pace doesn’t have to be slowed for any of them. There’s no longer an application process, but dd made it very clear that she wanted to attend a humanities magnet. I’m thrilled when either of my kids don’t have homework and I get grumpier and grumpier about homework and projects in the final weeks of the school year. I’m a little disappointed that I have to drive dd to her magnet bus stop early in the morning, after years of anticipating her walking with friends to our neighborhood middle school. DD is only in 6th grade and I’ve already casually mentioned that it would be great for her to attend our home high school, where AP classes can challenge her. DD has never had a tutor or taken a prep class. She’s not in the magnet because that’s what her parents chose.

Not the PP, but we all know what your post reeks of....

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:New poster here. My child has also been unhappy at his magnet so far, although thankfully there's no bullying. I think a lot of it is being at a new, bigger school with different kids, so he doesn't have many friends or a built-in social net (not many kids from his ES are at this magnet). Also, MS involves more work and more effort academically. My child is doing fine academically, but I can tell he's more stressed this year. I hope things get better before the end of the year. I'm not sure if switching back to his home school would help. It's a difficult decision, because it's a one-way street. Once you go back, you can't change your mind if the problems persist at the home school. I don't have any advice, but wanted you to know your child isn't alone.

6th grade magnet is a big change for kids even if they were at HGC - probably even bigger coming from a neighborhood school. High expectations and doing work that is actually a challenge can throw a kid for a loop -but most of them get in the groove after awhile. My Blair CAP kid went to Eastern and broke down in tears a few times the first few months at EMS - but he'll tell you now that he wouldn't have traded his experience at Eastern for anything. He also learned vital lessons about time management, not letting the perfect be the enemy of the good enough, and his writing and critical thinking are far beyond what is taught at neighborhood MS. Also, and this is key - he will find his tribe eventually. The kids he was friends with in 6th were not his close buddies in 8th because he realized who he was and wasn't during MS, but oh the kids who are his friends in 8th - they are tight going into HS.

Thank you. This is very helpful.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Who was most motivated to apply to the magnet program - DC or parents? If parents, let DC go back to home school. They don't have the internal motivation to stick it out and figure out how to make it work. If they stay, they'll be miserable trying to satisfy parent wishes. If DC was the one who really wanted to apply, then have them stay at least through the semester, preferably until the end of the year. A lot of the challenge is simply middle school transition. But if they are highly motivated by the coursework and peers, they will figure out how to fit in and make friends.

-middle school magnet teacher (who has seen both types of kids)

It’s all parent led? The introverts will be introverts anywhere so they don’t care. It is the kids with friends and social systems that have the toughest time. Even harder if they go back to home high school.

I agree. Magnet middle schools are all pushed by parents. It's pretty sad they are willing to bus them across the county and be miserable, so they can brag and hope it gets them in a magnet high school

Have you attended a middle school magnet in MCPS? Have any of your children? Your post reeks of sour grapes. I hated school and would have gladly skipped any project that was optional, but my dc is that kid who gets excited about about being assigned a project. She actually wants to be challenged. She wants to acquire new skills. She wishes assignments were harder. She asks me to create assignments at home for her. She felt there should have been more homework in 5th grade. She resents the slow pace of the curriculum. She wants to have similar classmates so the pace doesn’t have to be slowed for any of them. There’s no longer an application process, but dd made it very clear that she wanted to attend a humanities magnet. I’m thrilled when either of my kids don’t have homework and I get grumpier and grumpier about homework and projects in the final weeks of the school year. I’m a little disappointed that I have to drive dd to her magnet bus stop early in the morning, after years of anticipating her walking with friends to our neighborhood middle school. DD is only in 6th grade and I’ve already casually mentioned that it would be great for her to attend our home high school, where AP classes can challenge her. DD has never had a tutor or taken a prep class. She’s not in the magnet because that’s what her parents chose.

Not the PP, but we all know what your post reeks of....

Yes, it reeks of reality.

Are all of the kids in all of the middle-school application magnets like that? No. But plenty of them are.

[Anonymous]

My 6th grade girl also withdrew from a magnet, for the same reasons. We made her stick it out for a semester. By that point I agreed that it was better to go back to our assigned middle school (which DCUM looks down upon immensely).

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My 6th grade girl also withdrew from a magnet, for the same reasons. We made her stick it out for a semester. By that point I agreed that it was better to go back to our assigned middle school (which DCUM looks down upon immensely).

Adding - my daughter drove the process, and was super excited about going to the school. It just wasn't the right fit for her.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Who was most motivated to apply to the magnet program - DC or parents? If parents, let DC go back to home school. They don't have the internal motivation to stick it out and figure out how to make it work. If they stay, they'll be miserable trying to satisfy parent wishes. If DC was the one who really wanted to apply, then have them stay at least through the semester, preferably until the end of the year. A lot of the challenge is simply middle school transition. But if they are highly motivated by the coursework and peers, they will figure out how to fit in and make friends.

-middle school magnet teacher (who has seen both types of kids)

It’s all parent led? The introverts will be introverts anywhere so they don’t care. It is the kids with friends and social systems that have the toughest time. Even harder if they go back to home high school.

I agree. Magnet middle schools are all pushed by parents. It's pretty sad they are willing to bus them across the county and be miserable, so they can brag and hope it gets them in a magnet high school

What's with all of the "busing across the county" rhetoric on DCUM? Bethesda to Silver Spring is not actually across the county.

Right. The magnet my son attends is only a 5 minute drive from our house. Granted, the bus takes longer because it takes a specific (longer) route, but it's still not terrible.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Who was most motivated to apply to the magnet program - DC or parents? If parents, let DC go back to home school. They don't have the internal motivation to stick it out and figure out how to make it work. If they stay, they'll be miserable trying to satisfy parent wishes. If DC was the one who really wanted to apply, then have them stay at least through the semester, preferably until the end of the year. A lot of the challenge is simply middle school transition. But if they are highly motivated by the coursework and peers, they will figure out how to fit in and make friends.

-middle school magnet teacher (who has seen both types of kids)

It’s all parent led? The introverts will be introverts anywhere so they don’t care. It is the kids with friends and social systems that have the toughest time. Even harder if they go back to home high school.

I agree. Magnet middle schools are all pushed by parents. It's pretty sad they are willing to bus them across the county and be miserable, so they can brag and hope it gets them in a magnet high school

What's with all of the "busing across the county" rhetoric on DCUM? Bethesda to Silver Spring is not actually across the county.

Right. The magnet my son attends is only a 5 minute drive from our house. Granted, the bus takes longer because it takes a specific (longer) route, but it's still not terrible.

Well bully for you. Not all of us have a magnet school in our neighborhood.

Traffic in MoCo is terrible. Our magnet was 12 miles away, 24 minutes right now, in the middle of the day, with light traffic. That's an hour each way in traffic during the morning and afternoon commute. I'm not willing to have a depressed tween/teen and force her to stay with it for years.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My 6th grade girl also withdrew from a magnet, for the same reasons. We made her stick it out for a semester. By that point I agreed that it was better to go back to our assigned middle school (which DCUM looks down upon immensely).

A semester, meaning the end of 6th, or after Christmas?
Thanks for sharing.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My 6th grade girl also withdrew from a magnet, for the same reasons. We made her stick it out for a semester. By that point I agreed that it was better to go back to our assigned middle school (which DCUM looks down upon immensely).

Adding - my daughter drove the process, and was super excited about going to the school. It just wasn't the right fit for her.

That feels sad. But the good thing is she knows what she needs.
Is she happier at the home school, any regret? Did you try to have her try one or two days at home school before withdrawing?