Girlfriend Wants A Specific Ring..

[Anonymous]

My ring was purchased at an aquarium’s gift shop for less than $1000.

[Anonymous]

I would never expect someone to pay more than 1500 for a ring.

[Anonymous]

Shop for the ring at Costco.

[Anonymous]

It's a ring she'll have forever.

Trust me, get the ring.

Fwiw, I got engaged at 23 and my husband could only afford a $10k ring at the time. 15 years later the truth is, that ring is so small! I rarely wear it anymore. I'd love to upgrade to something bigger but can't figure out how to broach the topic.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:$30-40k is a crazy amount. Don’t ever spend more than $5-10k.

Even my poor friends have rings that are more than 5k.

Then they’re not truly “poor”. Gimme a break.

My ring was $6,000. Our HHI is 160k - is that poor to you, PP?

Sorry but yes.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It's a ring she'll have forever.

Trust me, get the ring.

Fwiw, I got engaged at 23 and my husband could only afford a $10k ring at the time. 15 years later the truth is, that ring is so small! I rarely wear it anymore. I'd love to upgrade to something bigger but can't figure out how to broach the topic.

girl, bye

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP How old are you and how long have you been at this income level? At your HHI and no mortgage, you should be maxing out both of your 401k's and saving a boatload towards a down payment already. If you aren't you need to seriously look at your spending habits. If it's going towards rent, move and save!

This is bigger than what you can v should spend. You are already not on the same page about money. Before you get married, be sure you are on at least a similar page about finances. Money is the #1 thing most married couples fight about. I suggest meeting with a financial planner and looking at your plan holistically so you can plan for the ring, wedding, honeymoon, house, possible children, retirement etc. Map out your goals as a couple now. It will tell you a lot about whether you should get married or not.

Op here. I think maybe my title wasn’t the best. My girlfriend pointed out the style she liked with her friend, but she has not asked me to buy a certain ring, or even knows how much all of that costs. I want it to be a surprise, so we haven’t discussed the ring itself at all. I am thinking of going with a smaller Asscher cut ( 1.5 carats) or a round ( 2 carat) with a pave band.

I am 35 and have been making that since 31/32. I have a large savings account, but have some debt ( nothing substantial). I own a condo and I don’t spend frivolously. My girlfriend just graduated a year ago from grad school. She has some money saved, but used most of her savings to pay off student loans.

So buy the ring she wants! What's the big deal?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It's a ring she'll have forever.

Trust me, get the ring.

Fwiw, I got engaged at 23 and my husband could only afford a $10k ring at the time. 15 years later the truth is, that ring is so small! I rarely wear it anymore. I'd love to upgrade to something bigger but can't figure out how to broach the topic.

girl, bye

I knew someone would say something like this but it's all anonymous and it's the truth. Wouldn't this guy rather have his eyes opened now?

The truth is, she'll be disappointed if he cheaps out now.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:$30-40k is a crazy amount. Don’t ever spend more than $5-10k.

this. Beware of any woman who wants a 30-40k ring unless you are a legit millioinare. seriously. She needs to keep her girlfriend out of this discussion as well. ALso, buy on Blue Nile. Certified qaulity and definitely save like 20-40% over a retail store.

[Anonymous]

OP, do you expect your income to rise in the next few years (thus making it easier to save for the DP)?

If yes, get the ring she wants.

If no, you should have a discussion with her about what is more important to you guys: ring/wedding or house.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It's a ring she'll have forever.

Trust me, get the ring.

Fwiw, I got engaged at 23 and my husband could only afford a $10k ring at the time. 15 years later the truth is, that ring is so small! I rarely wear it anymore. I'd love to upgrade to something bigger but can't figure out how to broach the topic.

girl, bye

I knew someone would say something like this but it's all anonymous and it's the truth. Wouldn't this guy rather have his eyes opened now?

The truth is, she'll be disappointed if he cheaps out now.

What's next, a 30-foot yacht simply because she wants one? They need to compromise, not just throw money at the problem.

[Anonymous]

It is a gift. She either graciously accepts the gift you carefully choose, or she does not.

This is only the tip of a whole lot of life decisions that will reflect your values and priorities. Are the two of you on the same page and compatible? Best to delve into that now.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Just you wait guys. Next these ladies will want to spend $150K on a wedding, 30K on a wedding dress, 2.5 million on a house, etc., etc. And you will spend it, because you wouldn't want to disappoint the little princess, right? It is slippery slope you are all going down. Best of luck to you!

Of course. Nothing wrong with any of that if they can afford it.

Sounds like they can since they live in the Midwest and OP is early thirties. His income should rise in the next 10-20 years.

People earn the bulk of their wealth in their forties and fifties.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It's a ring she'll have forever.

Trust me, get the ring.

Fwiw, I got engaged at 23 and my husband could only afford a $10k ring at the time. 15 years later the truth is, that ring is so small! I rarely wear it anymore. I'd love to upgrade to something bigger but can't figure out how to broach the topic.

Only a $10k ring at 23? Oh, poor you!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You can afford it. Get her the ring. She is going to wear it every dang day and it will make her happy. Screw the haters on here saying otherwise.

didn't he say he makes $250K? no, it is not wise for him to spend more than 10% of his gross salary on a ring.

Oh please. Its a big salary, he can afford it, my husband spent 25% of his salary to get my ring it was 18k. Game on. I love it. I love him; and I love him for knowing the ring that blew my socks off 16 years ago, would still enjoy today!!