Girlfriend Wants A Specific Ring..

[Anonymous]

That's excellent OP. And, she is not "lying" like the other poster said. Most women want a certain look they like, but don't want to wear a super expensive ring everyday. Know I didn't!

We ended up going to a diamond broker, 15+ years ago, and they were able to put together exactly what I wanted for 5k.

If you and your fiance are a team, it works better if you do this sort of stuff together. My dh asked me to marry him first, without a ring, and then we did the shopping / research together. And at the end, he paid for it.

Glad your fiance sounds like a practical lady OP!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I will be honest, I am a pretty simple woman. I do not even have pierced ears nor do I own any jewelry. I am very low maintenance. However, I had always had very specific notions about THE RING, my engagement ring.

I knew I was not going to need or want other fancy jewelry in my life but I wanted the ring my husband would propose to me with to be very special. 1.5 - 1.8 carats. Round brilliant with a pave band.

I wanted it to be simple so the focus would be on the large perfect diamond on my dainty fingers.

My husband thought engagement rings were unnecessary and wanted to get me a less than a carat ring from James Allen.

When I found out, I was crushed and almost did not want to marry him. How little did he know me and how little did he care how important this one item was to me?

I did tell him how I felt and he finally got me a poor quality 1 carat with a halo.

I dislike it. But I wear it every day. I love him and married him because I am not materialistic. But boy how he would've rocked my socks off if he had put a little bit of thought into my ring.


Please don't do this to your wife.

You sound very high maintenance and full of yourself. “My dainty little finger . . .” Gag me.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Big rings always make me feel like she’s been bought. It’s like real estate on a finger. Some people are into that but call it something else, not loving commitment.

Lol. In the working world big rings make me think, “she’s here because she is good at what she does and wants to be hereand won’t be putting up with any BS.

And it comes off as pure Stepford to me.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Big rings always make me feel like she’s been bought. It’s like real estate on a finger. Some people are into that but call it something else, not loving commitment.

Lol. In the working world big rings make me think, “she’s here because she is good at what she does and wants to be hereand won’t be putting up with any BS.

Any ring or jewelry she bought herself, sure.

[Anonymous]

https://www.bluenile.com/diamond-search

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Has your girlfriend actually seen an asscher diamond in person? Because it’s a step cut and not a brilliant cut, it won’t sparkle the same way a round will. Not saying it’s a bad look by any means but it’s different than what the standard round diamond will look like. And as someone else said, it’s cut deeper to get the windmill look so it won’t face up the same mm as a round of the same carat. You may need to discuss this with your girlfriend so you’re both on the same page.

Btw, I’ve been married 14 years and I wear my rings daily. My parents have been married for 50 years and my mom wears hers daily. Not every woman stops wearing them.

+1. I have a friend that’s a millionaire with a giant Asher plus baguettes. It’s so blah! No sparkle it’s like a huge rock. My round is under 2 but soooo sparkly I get compliments all the time. A top quality round stone is WOW.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:That's excellent OP. And, she is not "lying" like the other poster said. Most women want a certain look they like, but don't want to wear a super expensive ring everyday. Know I didn't!

We ended up going to a diamond broker, 15+ years ago, and they were able to put together exactly what I wanted for 5k.

If you and your fiance are a team, it works better if you do this sort of stuff together. My dh asked me to marry him first, without a ring, and then we did the shopping / research together. And at the end, he paid for it.

Glad your fiance sounds like a practical lady OP!

Did he even propose on one knee or did you just have a series of conversations? Geez let the guy be a little romantic.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I would be livid if my boyfriend spent that much on a ring. Under 1,000, no diamond. I’d rather we invested in our life than a hand decoration.

Livid. Really?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I would be livid if my boyfriend spent that much on a ring. Under 1,000, no diamond. I’d rather we invested in our life than a hand decoration.

Livid. Really?

Eh, it’s no worse a response than someone expecting a boulder. Bit more concise than the multi paragraph justification as to why they need an enormous sparkler. Let’s say less livid more questioning his financial priorities. Diamonds mean nothing to me.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:“I was planning on spending X. We can either find something you like in that price range or you can come up with the difference. If this doesn’t work for you then maybe we have different outlooks and values when it comes to money. And we might be a good match long term”

And I say this as a woman

I agree wholeheartedly with this. Realistically, she should look at this as the expenditure of her future (shared) money, and you should be discussing these sorts of things before you get married.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Big rings always make me feel like she’s been bought. It’s like real estate on a finger. Some people are into that but call it something else, not loving commitment.

Lol. In the working world big rings make me think, “she’s here because she is good at what she does and wants to be hereand won’t be putting up with any BS.

Yes, if they're 40+. If they're in their 20s or 30s, my experience is that most of them end up being sahms.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:https://www.bluenile.com/diamond-search

Def blue nile. My ring apprasied for 21k but my DH bought it on blue nile for 13k. 1.5 carats, very high quality.

[Anonymous]

i would say don'tr let the door hit you on the way out.

[Anonymous]

Take her out shopping for rings.
I received a lovely one carat round solitaire in platinum setting which I wear every day.
The fab diamond family ring I received from my mom sits in a a safety deposit box.
I NEVER thought I would be reluctant to wear the fab ring but I am.
So you never know.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here. I think this thread has gotten way out of hand. My girlfriend never demanded a certain size ring or price tag. She looked at a magazine and said she liked asscher style ring with one of her friends. That was it. I realized they were pricey after looking it up. I talked with her last night and casually slipped in a
“ friend” just bought his girlfriend a 2-3 $30k ring. She said that price and carat was inane, and would never expect me to spend that on a ring. I told her that the diamond cut she likes is very expensive and we looked at other options. She said a nice round diamond for $1.5-2 carats was really nice. I think I’ve decided on a 1.5 round diamond with a pave band.

She’s lying.

Not necessarily, some women don’t care that much. I’m not a big jewelry person and told my DH that I didn’t even want a real diamond, it’s a waste of money that I would rather spend on a house. He ended up spending $2,000 on a half carat from blue Nike. I would have been happy with a CZ. Diamonds are a bad investment with bad resale value. I don’t need a huge diamond to commit to my husband and could car less what other people think.