Two weeks to go and DS is shooting himself in the foot!!

[Anonymous]

Parents should know what is available to the student for financing their education rather than doing this hope-hope-merit-aid or nothing nonsense.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP again. DS blew off a visit to his high school from one of the colleges he's applying to!! I had to leave the house when I heard this one! I felt like yelling at him, but instead I told him I had errands to run. I'm really incredulous he would take such a casual attitude toward this process! He's a good student and normally a responsible kid. He told me he "forgot" about the visit even though DH reminded him of it (at my urging). I don't know what to think....

This is not a big deal unless the school takes notes on interest.

Remember that there are more than just November 1st deadlines. If he doesn't make it in this round, hearing friends talk about getting results in a month or so might make him more motivated to hit the December and January deadlines.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:When did you explain very clearly to him that you can't afford college w/o merit aid? And are there schools he was interested in that aren't on his list because of finances?

OP. We explained very clearly, right from the start of high school, that we did not have enough money to send him to private college, and that if he wanted private college, he needed to get good grades and get merit aid. He's known, and still he drags his feet, sabotages himself. I wish a psychologist would explain this to me because I don't get it. Does he not want to go to college? He says he does. He's smart, he'll do well in college, his friends are all applying to college. Is he afraid of college? Is he being passive-aggressive because I'm pushing him (not to go to a good college, but to get $$ for college!) and he hates the pressure? Why let a child fail? I go back and forth about this one. The deadline looms, yet DS is still moseying along. He "forgot" to give his teacher his resume, so she hasn't written one of his recommendations. She asked for it weeks ago! We found this out today. I want to tear out my hair!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP again. DS blew off a visit to his high school from one of the colleges he's applying to!! I had to leave the house when I heard this one! I felt like yelling at him, but instead I told him I had errands to run. I'm really incredulous he would take such a casual attitude toward this process! He's a good student and normally a responsible kid. He told me he "forgot" about the visit even though DH reminded him of it (at my urging). I don't know what to think....

Your kid doesn't care as much as you. Take a hint.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:When did you explain very clearly to him that you can't afford college w/o merit aid? And are there schools he was interested in that aren't on his list because of finances?

OP. We explained very clearly, right from the start of high school, that we did not have enough money to send him to private college, and that if he wanted private college, he needed to get good grades and get merit aid. He's known, and still he drags his feet, sabotages himself. I wish a psychologist would explain this to me because I don't get it. Does he not want to go to college? He says he does. He's smart, he'll do well in college, his friends are all applying to college. Is he afraid of college? Is he being passive-aggressive because I'm pushing him (not to go to a good college, but to get $$ for college!) and he hates the pressure? Why let a child fail? I go back and forth about this one. The deadline looms, yet DS is still moseying along. He "forgot" to give his teacher his resume, so she hasn't written one of his recommendations. She asked for it weeks ago! We found this out today. I want to tear out my hair!

He is scared.