Has anyone here successfully terminated spousal support?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Thanks! I don't feel bitter anymore. Mostly just want it over with. Part of me still can't understand. I am genuinely a good person and always tried to do the right thing. When I married her she was a single mother on welfare. Her child's father was in prison and never contributed a dime to the care of his child.

Couple of thoughts:

No good deed goes unpunished
Why would you marry a single mom on welfare who has a baby's daddy in prison?

I gave them both a good stable life. In return I got a miserable, lazy woman that was physically and emotionally abusive to me. She was a very unhappy woman and we were very unhappy together. I really don't understand how she feels like she's owed anything. That will always boggle my mind.

This is why you don't marry women like that. Also, women feel entitled to men's money because they perceive the "system" and "society" as unfair and rigged in men's favor. So they want money as recourse.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Thanks! I don't feel bitter anymore. Mostly just want it over with. Part of me still can't understand. I am genuinely a good person and always tried to do the right thing. When I married her she was a single mother on welfare. Her child's father was in prison and never contributed a dime to the care of his child.

Couple of thoughts:

No good deed goes unpunished
Why would you marry a single mom on welfare who has a baby's daddy in prison?

I gave them both a good stable life. In return I got a miserable, lazy woman that was physically and emotionally abusive to me. She was a very unhappy woman and we were very unhappy together. I really don't understand how she feels like she's owed anything. That will always boggle my mind.

This is why you don't marry women like that. Also, women feel entitled to men's money because they perceive the "system" and "society" as unfair and rigged in men's favor. So they want money as recourse.

I was in my early 20's. Raised in a restrictive religion. I hadn't dated anyone else which is stupid of me. My parents had a horrible marriage and broke up when I was 18, so I was determined that I could make it work if I tried hard enough and compromised enough. I've since left the religion and her and it's opened my eyes up to say the least.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Oh OP, until you said you were in Cali, I was sure you were my husband and this were a few years back. Same situation, I mean, almost exact same details. Husband married a woman years back, impressed with her ability to start a home cleaning business with no high school or other education so speak of, she swindles him, they marry, she quits her lucrative business, stops chasing her exes for support and lets him support hers and then their kids. Miserable lazy woman, works at the pharmacy now counting pills for $8 an hour and just moved in with an ex-con. Yay!

But my husband paid for years, and she never spent a dime on their kids, hoarded all that money. But I digress.

You can go for a change in circumstances, however, there are a few other things you haven't considered. The "change" may also include your support of new wife and child, as well as old wife having a job. Agree with PP who said spousal support is supposed to be for a period of time, but not for the length of the marriage -what the eff. Way to make a woman have zero desire to work again. I have a friend who was married in Cali for 20 years, and they gave him 10 of spousal support. There was a half/life thing on the marriage to support equation, so that's another issue you might be able to figure out.

All the lawyers are going to maim me, but why not file on your own? It can't get worse, it could only get better, so why not go it alone and see what you come up with? Let her hire a lawyer and spend some money being a professional golddigger.

And for what it's worth, I tell the hubs all the time, I cannot believe he got married again (to me.) Bitch almost ruined him for good. Damn.

Thanks for sharing that. I am going to file for a modification on my own. You're right there's nothing to lose.