Has anyone here successfully terminated spousal support?

[Anonymous]

Some people givers, some are takers. In the end, just trust that karma has a way of coming around.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It's absurd that a ten year, childless, marriage should result in alimony. Shame on your ex and anyone who even tries to defend it.

Op here. That's exactly where I am coming from. A 38 yr old healthy woman has no real need to be supported, other than her own laziness.
If there were children involved or she was at an age that she could not support herself, fine. But this was neither.

Did you move for your job? Keep strange hours?

No neither

[Anonymous]

O.P. - You are correct that it isn't fair.

Nor is it logical.

Rather, it just "is."

And, for you, the light at the end of the tunnel is coming into view.

You have a whole life in front of you, without your ex to forever haunt you.

Don't re-marry.

Or, if you do, one word: PRE-NUP.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Add up what you'll have to pay for next 4 years. Compare to the 50K you already spent in lawyers and likely would to fight this. Imagine paying that on top of the 4 additional years if you lose.

I totally get that it's unfair. She's a freeloader. But I think you are likely to burn too much more $$$ fighting this now with little chance of prevailing.

You're in the downhill stretch of getting her out of your life forever and ever. I'd just coast unless you have more money to burn.

While I agree with the basic advise to run the numbers, you should NOT factor in the 50K already spent!
That's irrelevant to your best go-forward decision, and you should keep the focus on the what the numbers (going forward) tell you,
ignoring any monies that have already spent, that's just pointless emotion to even think about it.

Do you have a CPA friend who can help you do this cost analysis and reach an impartial answer?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:O.P. - You are correct that it isn't fair.

Nor is it logical.

Rather, it just "is."

And, for you, the light at the end of the tunnel is coming into view.

You have a whole life in front of you, without your ex to forever haunt you.

Don't re-marry.

Or, if you do, one word: PRE-NUP.

He remarried and has a daughter.

[Anonymous]

If you really want to do this, consult a lawyer. Pay for a couple hours of time to hear what he/she suggests, then figure out the costs. Filing for modification is probably simplest. Who knows - maybe you could at least get a reduction.

[Anonymous]

All I know is my friend just got a summons that her ex has filed a complaint for her salary and expenses to get reevaluated, claiming she makes too much. Granted he's a total unemployed loser and never pays anyways, but that happens.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:All I know is my friend just got a summons that her ex has filed a complaint for her salary and expenses to get reevaluated, claiming she makes too much. Granted he's a total unemployed loser and never pays anyways, but that happens.

For child support or alimony?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It's absurd that a ten year, childless, marriage should result in alimony. Shame on your ex and anyone who even tries to defend it.

We have one side of the story. Odds are she has one also. I'm not going to defend her because I have no basis, but I'm also not going to judge her based on the biased account of a bitter ex.

I don't need another side. A childless 38yr old with no employment is a complete loser.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:All I know is my friend just got a summons that her ex has filed a complaint for her salary and expenses to get reevaluated, claiming she makes too much. Granted he's a total unemployed loser and never pays anyways, but that happens.

For child support or alimony?

You know...I don't know. Could be both. I think worse if it is child support. Her kids are young and in daycare and he is only obligated to pay $1000/mo as it is. The guy is a complete loser.

Eve if for both, how could one possibly get child support reevaluated and not alimony?? That would be crazy backwards.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Pretty much no such thing as common law marriage anymore.

What were the stipulations in the divorce decree? Did having a job or income negate spousal support?

She's right to be bitter that you left her.

The stipulations were remarriage or cohabitation. No a job or income did not negate spousal support.
Why is she right to be bitter that I left her, in your opinion?

I'd love to heAR thr response as well.

[Anonymous]

OP, what state was this, where the judge ordered 10 years? I would have expected 3 years in a case like this. Just long enough for ex to retrain as needed and find a job. It is becoming more and more unusual to see long spousal support awards for childless marriages and young ages upon divorce. It was different decades ago when women couldn't find work and weren't expected to.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It's absurd that a ten year, childless, marriage should result in alimony. Shame on your ex and anyone who even tries to defend it.

Completely agree. Then again, marriage is just a gravy train for the gals.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It's absurd that a ten year, childless, marriage should result in alimony. Shame on your ex and anyone who even tries to defend it.

I totally agree. And I say that as a woman and feminist. Unless she has some sort of disability, that is way over the top.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP, what state was this, where the judge ordered 10 years? I would have expected 3 years in a case like this. Just long enough for ex to retrain as needed and find a job. It is becoming more and more unusual to see long spousal support awards for childless marriages and young ages upon divorce. It was different decades ago when women couldn't find work and weren't expected to.

+1000. Ten years of spousal support after a ten-year marriage that resulted in no children is highly unusual, which is why I suspect there were other factors at play that OP isn't disclosing.