HGC demographics

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Well you certainly seem willing enough the accept the generosity of this country when it comes to jobs, schools and a safe living environment.

Yeah! I am certainly willing to accept everything this country has to offer because this country does not belong to Whites. I will happily go back to my home country when Native Americans ask everyone to leave and when all possible restitution has been made to all countries who were colonized by Whites and all the races that were enslaved by Whites.

Now, how do you like them apples?

You have issues.

Absolutely. I have issues with racist stereotyping. I think I also have issues with some scumbag telling me that as a "foreign born" naturalized American (and mother of American citizens)that I have to tow some White person's idea of what freedom of speech is.

I also have issues with White Americans trying to claim "reverse racism" when they are given a dose of their own medicine. Watch this to understand why this does not work -
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dw_mRaIHb-M


I have issues with people having issues with the fact that I focus on my kid's education. I have issues with the fact that I am now feeling compelled to defend my community and parenting style - not because I am a neglectful mom, who is snorting cocaine and letting my kids do whatever they want to BUT because I am actually an involved parent who is doing my best to raise a child who will be a contributing member of the society.

I however do not have any issues with unsheathing my claws and taking some swipes now and then. Tiger moms are on the top of the food chain in the jungle - FYI!

PP. I am a foreign born Asian mom who does not have tutor for my kids. There are racists on both sides, let's not kid ourselves. Some people who have negative views on extra tutors for kids and such are not racist, and some clearly are. I don't think most parents here have issues with parents focusing on education. It is when parents *only* focus on education at the detriment of everything else that people start judging...and yes, people here judge. If you post on DCUM, you will get judged. If you are not pushy with your kids and your kids are well-rounded, then you shouldn't feel the need to defend yourself.

I know what the Asian culture is like, and some of it is not so great. The emphasis on only academics is not healthy. Maybe this is required in most Asian countries, but that is not the case here. Your kids and my kids have an immense opportunity here, both academically and otherwise, that they may not have in our home countries. Let's take advantage of these opportunities to let the kids be kids for just a bit. We are talking about ES kids here. Rigorous academia is just around the corner. When it really counts, that's when the Tiger Mom needs to come out.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Well you certainly seem willing enough the accept the generosity of this country when it comes to jobs, schools and a safe living environment.

Yeah! I am certainly willing to accept everything this country has to offer because this country does not belong to Whites. I will happily go back to my home country when Native Americans ask everyone to leave and when all possible restitution has been made to all countries who were colonized by Whites and all the races that were enslaved by Whites.

Now, how do you like them apples?

You have issues.

Absolutely. I have issues with racist stereotyping. I think I also have issues with some scumbag telling me that as a "foreign born" naturalized American (and mother of American citizens)that I have to tow some White person's idea of what freedom of speech is.

I also have issues with White Americans trying to claim "reverse racism" when they are given a dose of their own medicine. Watch this to understand why this does not work -
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dw_mRaIHb-M


I have issues with people having issues with the fact that I focus on my kid's education. I have issues with the fact that I am now feeling compelled to defend my community and parenting style - not because I am a neglectful mom, who is snorting cocaine and letting my kids do whatever they want to BUT because I am actually an involved parent who is doing my best to raise a child who will be a contributing member of the society.

I however do not have any issues with unsheathing my claws and taking some swipes now and then. Tiger moms are on the top of the food chain in the jungle - FYI!

I really think you have misinterpreted a lot of what was said. Regardless, I can only applaud your dedication to your children.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
Absolutely. I have issues with racist stereotyping. I think I also have issues with some scumbag telling me that as a "foreign born" naturalized American (and mother of American citizens)that I have to tow some White person's idea of what freedom of speech is.

I also have issues with White Americans trying to claim "reverse racism" when they are given a dose of their own medicine. Watch this to understand why this does not work -
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dw_mRaIHb-M


I have issues with people having issues with the fact that I focus on my kid's education. I have issues with the fact that I am now feeling compelled to defend my community and parenting style - not because I am a neglectful mom, who is snorting cocaine and letting my kids do whatever they want to BUT because I am actually an involved parent who is doing my best to raise a child who will be a contributing member of the society.

I however do not have any issues with unsheathing my claws and taking some swipes now and then. Tiger moms are on the top of the food chain in the jungle - FYI!

PP. I am a foreign born Asian mom who does not have tutor for my kids. There are racists on both sides, let's not kid ourselves. Some people who have negative views on extra tutors for kids and such are not racist, and some clearly are. I don't think most parents here have issues with parents focusing on education. It is when parents *only* focus on education at the detriment of everything else that people start judging...and yes, people here judge. If you post on DCUM, you will get judged. If you are not pushy with your kids and your kids are well-rounded, then you shouldn't feel the need to defend yourself.

I know what the Asian culture is like, and some of it is not so great. The emphasis on only academics is not healthy. Maybe this is required in most Asian countries, but that is not the case here. Your kids and my kids have an immense opportunity here, both academically and otherwise, that they may not have in our home countries. Let's take advantage of these opportunities to let the kids be kids for just a bit. We are talking about ES kids here. Rigorous academia is just around the corner. When it really counts, that's when the Tiger Mom needs to come out.

Actually, I am not defending myself. Rather, I am defending the choice of others to get tutoring for their kids. I am also trying to point out that many times the conversation is not about the pressures a child can be under, but about a certain culture and the way they parent. Tiger Moms have now become synonymous with Asian moms. Even though every parent in an HGC is a Tiger mom/dad because they are engaged in their child's schooling.

Most parents here who are from a different country are aware of the fact that they need to take the best from both the cultures and discard the worst. I think most of us are trying to do our best for our children. However, many of the posts here have strong currents of racism against ANY race other than Whites. And so, some home truths need to be told to everyone.

I feel that if any non-White child achieves something worthwhile, the snark starts here. If you want to have a discussion it disintegrates into how miserable the Asian kids lives are and how AA kids only get into Ivies because of Affirmative Action.

I did not know how deep these resentments run - unless I started reading it here. I can understand outrage about parenting when there is neglect involved, but when parents are dedicating their time, effort and money towards their child - this sort of criticism is not warranted. There needs to be an understanding about cultural differences. However, a malicious pleasure is taken to reduce all the achievement that has come about through lot of sacrifice and hard work into a caricature.

This is DC, where all nations and nationalities are represented, people are highly educated, they are exposed to other cultures, they have high SES - these are the advantages and benefits that are not afforded to most of the people in this nation. Is this all one is capable of, after all the education and advantages?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

This is DC, where all nations and nationalities are represented, people are highly educated, they are exposed to other cultures, they have high SES - these are the advantages and benefits that are not afforded to most of the people in this nation. Is this all one is capable of, after all the education and advantages?

Yes. Because all of us believe that the opportunities for a good education are in limited supply. And if the opportunities for a good education are in limited supply, then your kid can only get their opportunity by taking it away from my kid.

This is not what I believe. But it's the reason.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
Absolutely. I have issues with racist stereotyping. I think I also have issues with some scumbag telling me that as a "foreign born" naturalized American (and mother of American citizens)that I have to tow some White person's idea of what freedom of speech is.

I also have issues with White Americans trying to claim "reverse racism" when they are given a dose of their own medicine. Watch this to understand why this does not work -
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dw_mRaIHb-M


I have issues with people having issues with the fact that I focus on my kid's education. I have issues with the fact that I am now feeling compelled to defend my community and parenting style - not because I am a neglectful mom, who is snorting cocaine and letting my kids do whatever they want to BUT because I am actually an involved parent who is doing my best to raise a child who will be a contributing member of the society.

I however do not have any issues with unsheathing my claws and taking some swipes now and then. Tiger moms are on the top of the food chain in the jungle - FYI!

PP. I am a foreign born Asian mom who does not have tutor for my kids. There are racists on both sides, let's not kid ourselves. Some people who have negative views on extra tutors for kids and such are not racist, and some clearly are. I don't think most parents here have issues with parents focusing on education. It is when parents *only* focus on education at the detriment of everything else that people start judging...and yes, people here judge. If you post on DCUM, you will get judged. If you are not pushy with your kids and your kids are well-rounded, then you shouldn't feel the need to defend yourself.

I know what the Asian culture is like, and some of it is not so great. The emphasis on only academics is not healthy. Maybe this is required in most Asian countries, but that is not the case here. Your kids and my kids have an immense opportunity here, both academically and otherwise, that they may not have in our home countries. Let's take advantage of these opportunities to let the kids be kids for just a bit. We are talking about ES kids here. Rigorous academia is just around the corner. When it really counts, that's when the Tiger Mom needs to come out.

Actually, I am not defending myself. Rather, I am defending the choice of others to get tutoring for their kids. I am also trying to point out that many times the conversation is not about the pressures a child can be under, but about a certain culture and the way they parent. Tiger Moms have now become synonymous with Asian moms. Even though every parent in an HGC is a Tiger mom/dad because they are engaged in their child's schooling.

Most parents here who are from a different country are aware of the fact that they need to take the best from both the cultures and discard the worst. I think most of us are trying to do our best for our children. However, many of the posts here have strong currents of racism against ANY race other than Whites. And so, some home truths need to be told to everyone.

I feel that if any non-White child achieves something worthwhile, the snark starts here. If you want to have a discussion it disintegrates into how miserable the Asian kids lives are and how AA kids only get into Ivies because of Affirmative Action.

I did not know how deep these resentments run - unless I started reading it here. I can understand outrage about parenting when there is neglect involved, but when parents are dedicating their time, effort and money towards their child - this sort of criticism is not warranted. There needs to be an understanding about cultural differences. However, a malicious pleasure is taken to reduce all the achievement that has come about through lot of sacrifice and hard work into a caricature.

This is DC, where all nations and nationalities are represented, people are highly educated, they are exposed to other cultures, they have high SES - these are the advantages and benefits that are not afforded to most of the people in this nation. Is this all one is capable of, after all the education and advantages?

No, they're really not all like that.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
Absolutely. I have issues with racist stereotyping. I think I also have issues with some scumbag telling me that as a "foreign born" naturalized American (and mother of American citizens)that I have to tow some White person's idea of what freedom of speech is.

I also have issues with White Americans trying to claim "reverse racism" when they are given a dose of their own medicine. Watch this to understand why this does not work -
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dw_mRaIHb-M


I have issues with people having issues with the fact that I focus on my kid's education. I have issues with the fact that I am now feeling compelled to defend my community and parenting style - not because I am a neglectful mom, who is snorting cocaine and letting my kids do whatever they want to BUT because I am actually an involved parent who is doing my best to raise a child who will be a contributing member of the society.

I however do not have any issues with unsheathing my claws and taking some swipes now and then. Tiger moms are on the top of the food chain in the jungle - FYI!

PP. I am a foreign born Asian mom who does not have tutor for my kids. There are racists on both sides, let's not kid ourselves. Some people who have negative views on extra tutors for kids and such are not racist, and some clearly are. I don't think most parents here have issues with parents focusing on education. It is when parents *only* focus on education at the detriment of everything else that people start judging...and yes, people here judge. If you post on DCUM, you will get judged. If you are not pushy with your kids and your kids are well-rounded, then you shouldn't feel the need to defend yourself.

I know what the Asian culture is like, and some of it is not so great. The emphasis on only academics is not healthy. Maybe this is required in most Asian countries, but that is not the case here. Your kids and my kids have an immense opportunity here, both academically and otherwise, that they may not have in our home countries. Let's take advantage of these opportunities to let the kids be kids for just a bit. We are talking about ES kids here. Rigorous academia is just around the corner. When it really counts, that's when the Tiger Mom needs to come out.

Actually, I am not defending myself. Rather, I am defending the choice of others to get tutoring for their kids. I am also trying to point out that many times the conversation is not about the pressures a child can be under, but about a certain culture and the way they parent. Tiger Moms have now become synonymous with Asian moms. Even though every parent in an HGC is a Tiger mom/dad because they are engaged in their child's schooling.

Most parents here who are from a different country are aware of the fact that they need to take the best from both the cultures and discard the worst. I think most of us are trying to do our best for our children. However, many of the posts here have strong currents of racism against ANY race other than Whites. And so, some home truths need to be told to everyone.

I feel that if any non-White child achieves something worthwhile, the snark starts here. If you want to have a discussion it disintegrates into how miserable the Asian kids lives are and how AA kids only get into Ivies because of Affirmative Action.

I did not know how deep these resentments run - unless I started reading it here. I can understand outrage about parenting when there is neglect involved, but when parents are dedicating their time, effort and money towards their child - this sort of criticism is not warranted. There needs to be an understanding about cultural differences. However, a malicious pleasure is taken to reduce all the achievement that has come about through lot of sacrifice and hard work into a caricature.

This is DC, where all nations and nationalities are represented, people are highly educated, they are exposed to other cultures, they have high SES - these are the advantages and benefits that are not afforded to most of the people in this nation. Is this all one is capable of, after all the education and advantages?

PP here. Not all HGC parents are tiger parents. As I stated, I'm an Asian mom with a DC in HGC and no tutors. What is a definition of a "tiger mom" anyway? Is it providing enrichment and expectations that their kids will try their best? By that definition, most affluent parents, regardless of race would be "tiger" parents. But, I don't think this is most people's definition of "tiger" parenting. If you were in Asia, and there was a large group of American families, a lot of the Asians would probably have strong vocal opinions about the American style of parenting. It may not be right, but it would probably happen. The American parents would continue to parent the way they thought was best, just the same as Asian "tiger" parents here. It's just an opinion. Some are just plain racist, and some are probably just upset (or jealous?) because there is a larger representation of Asians in gifted type programs and that means their child doesn't get into these programs.

It's possible that a select few racist people are the ones that mostly post racist remarks here. I don't know, obviously. It's just a possibility. I'm sure you've now come to realize that just because a person is highly educated and lives in a mostly diverse region doesn't mean that this person is culturally sensitive and not racist. You can be educated and racist at the same time, unfortunately. I guess when it comes to our kids, the claws come out, on both sides.

I agree, there are good and bad things about both cultures. I could write a long post about it from both perspectives but that is for another thread.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

This is the best reason I have read anywhere on DCUM for a reason to send a kid to academic tutoring (other than for needing extra help). But it seems like there could be better activities to send them to rather than academic tutoring. Add'l sports, music, even volunteering?

Actually, playing some video games (not violent ones) may help a kids' fine motor skills. Not saying we should let kids play electronics all day, but that is one side benefit. I think there was an article some time ago about how they found that surgeons and/or fighter pilots that played more computer games when they were yonger were better at some of the skills that required these types of motor skills.

Totally true. IXL and Khan are cheap/free and don't require parents to drive. So this is the lazy parent method of occupying idle hands/minds. They do sports and music. I wholeheartedly agree that volunteering is a good use of time...just don't always have time to facilitate it (kids cannot drive yet).

Are these online tutoring? OK, I admit, while I don't send my kids to after school tutoring, I do let them play math games and such online. Does that count as after school tutoring?

Yes, this is enrichment. Why do you think your kid needs that? If they were smart and had raw talent they should learn everything they need to "automagically" at school. I pity your child! You are the worst kind of a Tiger mom! I bet they do not have a life outside of doing Math game online. Don't you think they should have unstructured time in their life? Their childhood is pitiful. I bet they have a "dead look" in their eye from all that screen time!

Well, first of all, math online is about 10 to 15 min. Secondly, I didn't sign DC up for anything. DC asked to do it. It was this vs. writing math facts on paper. I let DC do it on the computer. So, DC does still have a lot unstructured time. Sometimes, DC chooses to read for an hour, sometimes DC goes out and plays. DCs eyes are far from "dead". They *sparkle*!

I take it you do put your kids in after-school tutoring, hence the sarcastic response(?).

Umm, actually my kids do not get after school tutoring but have had enough enrichment at home that they enjoy. From DCUM perspective they must be working hard because they are in magnets, and they participate in several ECs they enjoy, compete in county level and state level championships and win. But these accomplishments come easy to them. In addition - they also have a huge circle of friends, travel overseas every year, are healthy and thriving mentally and physically, have a great home environment and live in an intact family, have great relationship with relatives and friends!

No, not making sarcastic remarks but rather mimicking the words of many parents who pass value judgments on the parenting style of those who have tutors for their kids. To be sarcastic to you, I would have to envy you somehow - and I cannot find a reason to do that.

Asian mom here. I actually sympathize with many of your comments (to the extent I can identify which ones are yours), but I don't know that you do yourself (or other Asian moms) any favors by being sarcastic and attacking people who aren't even attacking you and your parenting style. That's awesome your kids and your life are so amazing, so why the defensiveness? Be proud, and ignore the haters. I find it hard to agree with you when you are taking gratuitous swipes at others (even if it's your attempt to be satirical). I was the one who said my kids do IXL and Khan just to not be idle, and I didn't read the responding comment to be disrespectful in any way. I don't think that person (or me, if the comment was directed to me) deserved your attack. I fully expect to be flamed now, so please proceed.