56 and pregnant. ask me anything

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Everyone depends on someone, but as pps have said, it is very likely that we may not be around/able bodied before the kid is 18. most people have someone to depend on, but as it stands, it looks inevitable that the child will need care other than our own anyway.

How do your older children feel about it?

They feel that we have been good parents to them, they think we could raise another, but the eldest supports our choice of adoption

Is your eldest male or female?

male

Any kid rooting for their sibling to stay? You seem like a realy cold hearted family.

[Anonymous]

Pics or it didn't happen.

[Anonymous]

In light of the circumstances, it seems odd to me that they would have discussed this with their children when only at 6 weeks.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:In light of the circumstances, it seems odd to me that they would have discussed this with their children when only at 6 weeks.

They are at 15 weeks.

[Anonymous]

Cold hearted? Why. We are looking at open adoption. So the child will always know its "family" but won't be uprooted as we age. And yes, we are 15 weeks. Just told the kids this week.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Cold hearted? Why. We are looking at open adoption. So the child will always know its "family" but won't be uprooted as we age. And yes, we are 15 weeks. Just told the kids this week.

Why? Because you are giving up your child and your children are giving up their sibling. It doesn't matter the child will know you - the fact will remain, you didn't want him.

[Anonymous]

Isn't it past your bedtime?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:obviously accidental. The age concern is an issue to us. We are looking into open adoption.

Now I know you are a COMPLETE weirdo. Holy sh*t.

1) 56 and pregnant
2) rude responses despite shamelessness of AMA thread about it
3) giving baby up for freaking adoption (when not necessary).

wow. just wow.

I don't think that it's weird to consider open adoption at all. To be honest, I would probably have considered abortion if I was in her shoes.

Same here.
Going through pregnancy and childbirth at 56 can pose significant risks to one's health.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:obviously accidental. The age concern is an issue to us. We are looking into open adoption.

Now I know you are a COMPLETE weirdo. Holy sh*t.

1) 56 and pregnant
2) rude responses despite shamelessness of AMA thread about it
3) giving baby up for freaking adoption (when not necessary).

wow. just wow.

I don't think that it's weird to consider open adoption at all. To be honest, I would probably have considered abortion if I was in her shoes.

IMHO, if a otherwise capable and SES stable family does not feel up to parenting another child and chooses adoption over abortion, that is an incredibly selfless thing to do. There is a lot of stigma around adoption, everyone will know about the baby, ask about the baby, etc., and it is hard to say honestly we are not up for this, our family is complete and while I love this child I think the best thing for this child is to give him/her up for adoption. She is talking about an open adoption. My hat is off to OP.

I guess I disagree. If I were the kid, to learn down the road that my birth family was "capable and SES stable" yet still gave me away . .. yikes! That would cause some serious trauma/anger issues, I think.

Unless you also learned that your birth parents were in their fifties when you were born and wanted you to have a more typical childhood and parents. Also, the OP is looking into open adoption, which means (I believe) that the child would know about and possibly have a relationship with OP and her husband. I think adoption is a selfless and beautiful thing that humans can do for one another. OP, I wish you and your family a lot of luck.

+1. With open adoption, the child can still have a loving relationship with the birth parents, while also having the benefit of a more typical childhood, possibly with siblings and parents who will be around well into his/her adulthood. I don't know that I would be selfless enough to make that choice in OP's position, but I respect it.

[Anonymous]

15 weeks and the OB hasn't discussed Maternit 21!? That's the only part of this bread that's really making me question the validity of it. At that age the OB would be pretty verbal about all of the AMA testing you should have.

[Anonymous]

We are having this child regardless of any health problems. Abortion is completely off the table and finding DS, or any chromosomal issue would not change that.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We are having this child regardless of any health problems. Abortion is completely off the table and finding DS, or any chromosomal issue would not change that.

But how have they not mentioned these tests to you? Regardless of doing them you would know what they are.

[Anonymous]

I'm still confused that you're pregnant at 56! Crazy, just crazy! I think adoption is a win win for all. Do what you think is best and don't worry about what anyone else thinks.

[Anonymous]

do not believe this.

[Anonymous]

My doctor has mentioned these tests. Just not callling them "Maternit21". Said that they are "genetic tests". I know what they are, just not that "brand name" so to speak.