DH is taking unpaid vacation

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Chipotle lady, here's how we know it 's you. In addition to atrocious writing, you ignore direct questions like:

- are you Chipotle lady?
- what makes you unable to work?
- do you in fact not have a car? Referencing Chipotle thread where, when asked why you couldn't eat in the car, you said "not everyone has a car." never answered whether or not YOU, in fact, have one.

So your threads are you saying something ridiculous, being asked direct questions, and ignoring them. Jeff, can you please ban her ridiculous threads?!? You can certainly tell it's her by the IP, right?

Ban me for being "ridiculous"??? Bwahahaha

Anyway, why does it matter who I am? Chipotle mom or not if you can't help why are you wasting your time here?

Jeff?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Chipotle lady, here's how we know it 's you. In addition to atrocious writing, you ignore direct questions like:

- are you Chipotle lady?
- what makes you unable to work?
- do you in fact not have a car? Referencing Chipotle thread where, when asked why you couldn't eat in the car, you said "not everyone has a car." never answered whether or not YOU, in fact, have one.

So your threads are you saying something ridiculous, being asked direct questions, and ignoring them. Jeff, can you please ban her ridiculous threads?!? You can certainly tell it's her by the IP, right?

Ban me for being "ridiculous"??? Bwahahaha

Anyway, why does it matter who I am? Chipotle mom or not if you can't help why are you wasting your time here?

Because we are not here to help (or not primarily).

Why I'm not surprised? (insert eye roll)

Anyway, after this past week when people has been calling me out on my threads I can't imagine what kind of boring lives you ladies live that you can just spend the entire day pulling out people's threads like this. What else do you do in your lives? This is an honest question... How many hours per day do you spend here? Is this the most exciting part of your day?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here.

Thanks to those who came with helpful tips.

I don't want to give more details because I don't want our friends knowing about our situation (and I have a few friends that post here) but let me say that I cannot work and DH cannot quit his job and he'll never be fired in a million years. He does very specialized work and it's very expensive to hire someone new to do it.

So he is the owner of the company or what? Because unless he is, it is almost inviting misfortune to pronounce on such matters so confidently. Especially you, since you are not even working. It's not all about money, you know - sometimes people are willing to pay more to get a better or even just a different employee.

To me it sounds like both you and your husband have an attitude issue here, perhaps willingly overlooking that in the other. You SAH but send one child to school and do not cover for both when they are sick (???). Your DH takes "unpaid vacation" in August (???). Unfortunately I am familiar with work frustration (though in my case the problem is that the company is dysfunctional while my own position is pretty good). I would never ever resign or take "unpaid vacation" before I found a better alternative (in fact, I already have a better alternative, it's just that it won't start for a few more months) though I could comfortably SAH if I wanted to. It blows my mind what the two of you are doing. Btw, I had friends who were similar in terms of attitude. The are both very bright people (one of them is a PhD) - by now, the wife has been unemployed for 5 years, and the husband for more than 10 years.

Typical DCUM bitch.

So here we go:

I cannot work. I sure want to but I can't.

DH has SEVERAL job offers that he can take any time but because of some legal issues he cannot take up any offers at this moment. Even quitting is not an option for him. He either stays with his salary living a miserable existence or he gets unpaid leave to dedicate time and energy to school and family.

It's not about a snob attitude, like you're trying to paint us, it's about knowing our options. DH's job is extremely specialized so he's very familiar with the market and his options. His friends call him all the time with offers in their companies and it breaks my heart to see that he can't take those offers. His company knows it and obviously won't raise his salary or give him a promotion. They're known for doing this. One of DH's closest co-worker came over for dinner once and I cried talking to his wife. She was telling me their story and I could not believe what they did to their family. She was on bed rest for several months with their #2, she was taken to he ER with some bleeding, they had to have an emergency C-sec and his manager (also DH's manager) kept calling him in the hospital asking him to log in. He was there trying to get news from his just born premature child, his wife that almost died after complications during the surgery and this asshole calling him asking him to log in? WTH?

Anyway, again thanks to the PPs who shared their stories, I really appreciate it.

And if you have any tips to save money, they're always welcome.

Let me guess: your DH's co-worker also has multiple job offers waiting in the wings, also cannot leave the company but, at the same time, cannot be fired either?

Actually, this guy was hired just for this project. He was just so fed up with the disrespect that he packed and left in the middle of it all. As soon as the doctor cleared the baby for a plane trip they packed and left.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Chipotle lady, here's how we know it 's you. In addition to atrocious writing, you ignore direct questions like:

- are you Chipotle lady?
- what makes you unable to work?
- do you in fact not have a car? Referencing Chipotle thread where, when asked why you couldn't eat in the car, you said "not everyone has a car." never answered whether or not YOU, in fact, have one.

So your threads are you saying something ridiculous, being asked direct questions, and ignoring them. Jeff, can you please ban her ridiculous threads?!? You can certainly tell it's her by the IP, right?

How well can you write in your second language? Do you even have one?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Chipotle lady, here's how we know it 's you. In addition to atrocious writing, you ignore direct questions like:

- are you Chipotle lady?
- what makes you unable to work?
- do you in fact not have a car? Referencing Chipotle thread where, when asked why you couldn't eat in the car, you said "not everyone has a car." never answered whether or not YOU, in fact, have one.

So your threads are you saying something ridiculous, being asked direct questions, and ignoring them. Jeff, can you please ban her ridiculous threads?!? You can certainly tell it's her by the IP, right?

How well can you write in your second language? Do you even have one?

You do understand you are not the only non-native speaker here? Stop bragging.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here.

Thanks to those who came with helpful tips.

I don't want to give more details because I don't want our friends knowing about our situation (and I have a few friends that post here) but let me say that I cannot work and DH cannot quit his job and he'll never be fired in a million years. He does very specialized work and it's very expensive to hire someone new to do it.

So he is the owner of the company or what? Because unless he is, it is almost inviting misfortune to pronounce on such matters so confidently. Especially you, since you are not even working. It's not all about money, you know - sometimes people are willing to pay more to get a better or even just a different employee.

To me it sounds like both you and your husband have an attitude issue here, perhaps willingly overlooking that in the other. You SAH but send one child to school and do not cover for both when they are sick (???). Your DH takes "unpaid vacation" in August (???). Unfortunately I am familiar with work frustration (though in my case the problem is that the company is dysfunctional while my own position is pretty good). I would never ever resign or take "unpaid vacation" before I found a better alternative (in fact, I already have a better alternative, it's just that it won't start for a few more months) though I could comfortably SAH if I wanted to. It blows my mind what the two of you are doing. Btw, I had friends who were similar in terms of attitude. The are both very bright people (one of them is a PhD) - by now, the wife has been unemployed for 5 years, and the husband for more than 10 years.

Typical DCUM bitch.

So here we go:

I cannot work. I sure want to but I can't.

DH has SEVERAL job offers that he can take any time but because of some legal issues he cannot take up any offers at this moment. Even quitting is not an option for him. He either stays with his salary living a miserable existence or he gets unpaid leave to dedicate time and energy to school and family.

It's not about a snob attitude, like you're trying to paint us, it's about knowing our options. DH's job is extremely specialized so he's very familiar with the market and his options. His friends call him all the time with offers in their companies and it breaks my heart to see that he can't take those offers. His company knows it and obviously won't raise his salary or give him a promotion. They're known for doing this. One of DH's closest co-worker came over for dinner once and I cried talking to his wife. She was telling me their story and I could not believe what they did to their family. She was on bed rest for several months with their #2, she was taken to he ER with some bleeding, they had to have an emergency C-sec and his manager (also DH's manager) kept calling him in the hospital asking him to log in. He was there trying to get news from his just born premature child, his wife that almost died after complications during the surgery and this asshole calling him asking him to log in? WTH?

Anyway, again thanks to the PPs who shared their stories, I really appreciate it.

And if you have any tips to save money, they're always welcome.

Let me guess: your DH's co-worker also has multiple job offers waiting in the wings, also cannot leave the company but, at the same time, cannot be fired either?

Actually, this guy was hired just for this project. He was just so fed up with the disrespect that he packed and left in the middle of it all. As soon as the doctor cleared the baby for a plane trip they packed and left.

Well, it sure didn't take much for the one-project hire to feel "disrespected". It takes time to earn respect, you know. Something for you to ponder.

[Anonymous]

I so wish Jeff would say whether Chipotle Lady is posting all the weird posts lately or if its multiple posters just happening to write in completely defensive ways.

Seriously, I got too emotionally involved in some of the suspect CL threads...

[Anonymous]

This company is known for their non family friendly approach. They brought the guy here with his pregnant wife and young child so I don't blame him for packing and leaving when the company showed they would not be supportive.

Same thing is happening to us. Our family needs DH, they have no respect for him or his family so DH is taking a "sabbatical".

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here.

Thanks to those who came with helpful tips.

I don't want to give more details because I don't want our friends knowing about our situation (and I have a few friends that post here) but let me say that I cannot work and DH cannot quit his job and he'll never be fired in a million years. He does very specialized work and it's very expensive to hire someone new to do it.

So he is the owner of the company or what? Because unless he is, it is almost inviting misfortune to pronounce on such matters so confidently. Especially you, since you are not even working. It's not all about money, you know - sometimes people are willing to pay more to get a better or even just a different employee.

To me it sounds like both you and your husband have an attitude issue here, perhaps willingly overlooking that in the other. You SAH but send one child to school and do not cover for both when they are sick (???). Your DH takes "unpaid vacation" in August (???). Unfortunately I am familiar with work frustration (though in my case the problem is that the company is dysfunctional while my own position is pretty good). I would never ever resign or take "unpaid vacation" before I found a better alternative (in fact, I already have a better alternative, it's just that it won't start for a few more months) though I could comfortably SAH if I wanted to. It blows my mind what the two of you are doing. Btw, I had friends who were similar in terms of attitude. The are both very bright people (one of them is a PhD) - by now, the wife has been unemployed for 5 years, and the husband for more than 10 years.

Typical DCUM bitch.

So here we go:

I cannot work. I sure want to but I can't.

DH has SEVERAL job offers that he can take any time but because of some legal issues he cannot take up any offers at this moment. Even quitting is not an option for him. He either stays with his salary living a miserable existence or he gets unpaid leave to dedicate time and energy to school and family.

It's not about a snob attitude, like you're trying to paint us, it's about knowing our options. DH's job is extremely specialized so he's very familiar with the market and his options. His friends call him all the time with offers in their companies and it breaks my heart to see that he can't take those offers. His company knows it and obviously won't raise his salary or give him a promotion. They're known for doing this. One of DH's closest co-worker came over for dinner once and I cried talking to his wife. She was telling me their story and I could not believe what they did to their family. She was on bed rest for several months with their #2, she was taken to he ER with some bleeding, they had to have an emergency C-sec and his manager (also DH's manager) kept calling him in the hospital asking him to log in. He was there trying to get news from his just born premature child, his wife that almost died after complications during the surgery and this asshole calling him asking him to log in? WTH?

Anyway, again thanks to the PPs who shared their stories, I really appreciate it.

And if you have any tips to save money, they're always welcome.

Let me guess: your DH's co-worker also has multiple job offers waiting in the wings, also cannot leave the company but, at the same time, cannot be fired either?

Actually, this guy was hired just for this project. He was just so fed up with the disrespect that he packed and left in the middle of it all. As soon as the doctor cleared the baby for a plane trip they packed and left.

Well, it sure didn't take much for the one-project hire to feel "disrespected". It takes time to earn respect, you know. Something for you to ponder.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:
No school for your precious snowflake. Drop the cable. Keep the house warm in summer and very cool in winter. Cut back to one car. Clip coupons and shop at Costco. Don't buy anything extraneous, don't treat yourself, never eat out.

There, that was easy, right? My HHI is over $600k/yr. Meaning I've never done any of these things, and even I know how in theory. It's not rocket science, clearly.


You could drive a truck through the weird holes in your story.

The cable can be replaced with Netflix/Hulu or some lower-paying form of entertainment. The school, yeah, that needs to be dropped. Replace with some form of mutual babysitting. If it's possible to mothball a car and at least drop it from your insurance, etc., try that first before selling it.

Eating out and treating yourself can be cut back. Instead of say dropping $50 at Red Robin, drop $25 at Chipotle, or $10 at Starbucks -- it's not an "all or nothing" deal, and is easier to stick to IMO than trying to go cold turkey.

Is moving a possibility? Mortgage is always the biggest expense.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
No school for your precious snowflake. Drop the cable. Keep the house warm in summer and very cool in winter. Cut back to one car. Clip coupons and shop at Costco. Don't buy anything extraneous, don't treat yourself, never eat out.

There, that was easy, right? My HHI is over $600k/yr. Meaning I've never done any of these things, and even I know how in theory. It's not rocket science, clearly.


You could drive a truck through the weird holes in your story.

The cable can be replaced with Netflix/Hulu or some lower-paying form of entertainment. The school, yeah, that needs to be dropped. Replace with some form of mutual babysitting. If it's possible to mothball a car and at least drop it from your insurance, etc., try that first before selling it.

Eating out and treating yourself can be cut back. Instead of say dropping $50 at Red Robin, drop $25 at Chipotle, or $10 at Starbucks -- it's not an "all or nothing" deal, and is easier to stick to IMO than trying to go cold turkey.

Is moving a possibility? Mortgage is always the biggest expense.

Moving is a good suggestion, and would have the added benefit of taking care of the upstairs neighbor watering issue. Although I'm sure OP would find some reason to create drama wherever she goes.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I so wish Jeff would say whether Chipotle Lady is posting all the weird posts lately or if its multiple posters just happening to write in completely defensive ways.

Seriously, I got too emotionally involved in some of the suspect CL threads...

It's definitely her. See my post above re: not answering whether or not she is, referencing her 'multiple threads,' ignoring the questions that would resolve the holes in her story if she actually wanted help. How does she have all this time to post? (yet every now and then she comes on to attack people for responding to her...)

[Anonymous]

The idea to drop cable for Netflix is great! Thanks!

The school thing I'm not sure. Hiring a mothers helper for those 3 hours a day would cost me the same and besides so needs the interaction and I'm not being able to give it to her.

We don't pay mortgage and right now moving is impossible. The fines for breaking the lease are just too much.

We don't have a car but we use rentals on DH's points so has is a small expense.

I really appreciate you taking the time to share your suggestions.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
No school for your precious snowflake. Drop the cable. Keep the house warm in summer and very cool in winter. Cut back to one car. Clip coupons and shop at Costco. Don't buy anything extraneous, don't treat yourself, never eat out.

There, that was easy, right? My HHI is over $600k/yr. Meaning I've never done any of these things, and even I know how in theory. It's not rocket science, clearly.


You could drive a truck through the weird holes in your story.

The cable can be replaced with Netflix/Hulu or some lower-paying form of entertainment. The school, yeah, that needs to be dropped. Replace with some form of mutual babysitting. If it's possible to mothball a car and at least drop it from your insurance, etc., try that first before selling it.

Eating out and treating yourself can be cut back. Instead of say dropping $50 at Red Robin, drop $25 at Chipotle, or $10 at Starbucks -- it's not an "all or nothing" deal, and is easier to stick to IMO than trying to go cold turkey.

Is moving a possibility? Mortgage is always the biggest expense.

[Anonymous]

Why would you need a mother's helper? Plenty of people manage 2 kids at once.

And how old is your toddler? If you have options, group care is not the best one for kids under, say, 2.5, anyway. Before this point, it's all "parallel play", with little interaction.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I so wish Jeff would say whether Chipotle Lady is posting all the weird posts lately or if its multiple posters just happening to write in completely defensive ways.

Seriously, I got too emotionally involved in some of the suspect CL threads...

It's definitely her. See my post above re: not answering whether or not she is, referencing her 'multiple threads,' ignoring the questions that would resolve the holes in her story if she actually wanted help. How does she have all this time to post? (yet every now and then she comes on to attack people for responding to her...)

Ok we got it. You have no other form of entertainment in life. All you do is spend your days on DCUM reading thread after thread trying to recognize posters.

What part of my request to keep some details out of the discussion in order to avoid being recognized by neighbors and friends you didn't get?

[Anonymous]

And all you do is spend all day starting threads and responding to EVERY single statement that you don't like. No wonder you need a mother's helper.