7 Year Old Stealing

[Anonymous]

Had this problem with my 7 year old boy. He stole some Pokemon cards from a classmate. He had to return the Pokemon cards and write an apology letter. No video, TV for 2 weeks and extra chores.

I did tell him that if he continued to do this he would end up in the Principal's office and then possibly jail. The jail part really hit him hard he hasn't done it since. It's been almost 2 years.

[Anonymous]

I stole at age 6/7 from my aunt (we're the same age, so more like a cousin). Not only was I spanked but I had to go apologize in front of the entire family (they made a big deal of it) and then I was on punishment for awhile. Then, I had to get on the phone with my grandparents days later and tell them what I did. When my friends came to play with me, my mom told them that I was on punishment for stealing. When my sister stole from a store at age 5, my mom spanked her in the store and then made her return the items and told the store manager to call the cops. They pretended to and my sister was terrified.

For both of us, the shame and embarrassment was enough that we never did it again. I can remember being in the store with other kids wanting to steal years later and remembering the shame and walking out. My mom knew that I cared a great deal what my family thought of me (I was the goody-two shoes) and I think her punishments for both of us were appropriate.

I think you need to figure out a way to embarrass/shame your daughter so that she has a negative association with stealing. She has developed a habit at this point and if her behavior is not corrected now, you will have MAJOR problems on your hands.

[Anonymous]

PP here. Just realized this is an old post. Argh.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:A good bare bottom spanking is what they deserve for stealing. My daughter stole candy from a shop when she was 8 and was caught by the owner. I went to the shop and picked her up. When we got home I took her up to her room put her across my knee bared her bottom and spanked her bare bottom so hard she never stole again

This is an old thread. Why , pray tell, are you digging for opportunities to embarrass yourself?

Trashy.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I stole at age 6/7 from my aunt (we're the same age, so more like a cousin). Not only was I spanked but I had to go apologize in front of the entire family (they made a big deal of it) and then I was on punishment for awhile. Then, I had to get on the phone with my grandparents days later and tell them what I did. When my friends came to play with me, my mom told them that I was on punishment for stealing. When my sister stole from a store at age 5, my mom spanked her in the store and then made her return the items and told the store manager to call the cops. They pretended to and my sister was terrified.

For both of us, the shame and embarrassment was enough that we never did it again. I can remember being in the store with other kids wanting to steal years later and remembering the shame and walking out. My mom knew that I cared a great deal what my family thought of me (I was the goody-two shoes) and I think her punishments for both of us were appropriate.

I think you need to figure out a way to embarrass/shame your daughter so that she has a negative association with stealing. She has developed a habit at this point and if her behavior is not corrected now, you will have MAJOR problems on your hands.

Did you even read the post? Shame and embarrassment is what led to the OP's predicament in the first place. She's controlling and abusive, and now you want her to start hitting, too? What is wrong with you?

[Anonymous]

It's an old post so shut up and move on PP.

[Anonymous]

LT My son stole a toy from his classmate today and i think i am angryyyyyy

[Anonymous]

Maybe she doesn't like your "homemade treats". Take her to the grocery store and let her pick out what she likes. Pack a serving for lunch.

I don't think letting her eat a somewhat junky lunch with healthy breakfast and dinner is bad.

[Anonymous]

So, what happened OP? I hope you let us know and are still on DCUM.

[Anonymous]

We don't spank a lot but when my 8yr old boy was caught taking lunch money from a desk he had to give back twice the money. That night we did warm his bare little behind. He never stole again.

[Anonymous]

I was a sneaky child with a bitchy, judgemental mom and my whole life until college I had to listen to her scream at me what a disgusting liar I was. I could fail to clean my room and somehow it was about how I was a sneaky, worthless liar. Gues what I became? A person who stole food, clothes, etc. through college. Guess what else I became? Obsessed with food and dieting to point of being scary skinny for a few years in high school and keeping diaries of everything I ate for about 10 years of my life. I really wish I had gone to therapy as a kid instead of being branded as a thief and a liar and having what little control over my life I did have taken away by my overbearing mother. Also - I was diagnosed with ADD in my 20s. That is linked with impulse control. I've learned to control it through behavior therapy - not meds.

I think making her admit and apologize to the girls is a terrible idea. She will be unpopular for years to come and may fall in with a bad crowd. What do they have that she doesn't? Are they thinner, richer, prettier? Is she doing this because she just wants stuff and has no impulse control? Or is it about those girls? Or you?

I agree with "can't buy without a note" and I agree with people at the school knowing - just not the friends.

I think she needs to go to therapy and get to talk to the Dr. without you in the room. I think there is more to this and deep down there is a reason she does this that she can't tell you and you are part of the dynamic. Please invest the time now and perhaps salvage a relationship with your daughter when she is older. For a kid that age, therapy and guidance counselor sessions will both feel like punishment and give her a chance to work this out with someone other than you.

[Anonymous]

Well... I think a severe spanking would be the solution. When I was 7, I stole some money, a few cents, and my mother gave me the mother of all spankings with my dad's belt. I've never stolen again.

[Anonymous]

Don't worry, DCUM-ers, this isn't a case of someone(s) digging into the archives to dredge up an old controvercial post. For some reason, sometimes old posts float up to the top -- it happened to me, it can happen to anyone!

Some sort of glitch in the archiving system?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Don't worry, DCUM-ers, this isn't a case of someone(s) digging into the archives to dredge up an old controvercial post. For some reason, sometimes old posts float up to the top -- it happened to me, it can happen to anyone!

Some sort of glitch in the archiving system?

The last two people who revived the threads were totally pro-hitting. I dont think it's a coincidence.

The gist of the pro-hitting posts was, "I hit my kid really hard and he never did THAT again!" But most kids don't do THAT again, even without their parents hitting them. THey are trying to justify their own laziness. I guess hitting is easier than actually disciplining your kid.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Well... I think a severe spanking would be the solution. When I was 7, I stole some money, a few cents, and my mother gave me the mother of all spankings with my dad's belt. I've never stolen again.

My brother stole some stickers from the grocery store. My parents weren't lazy, so they took him back to the grocery store and had him apologize, return the stickers, and pay for the package he had already opened. I am sorry that your mom chose to hit you rather than get in the car. Going to the store took some time, though, whereas you can just go ahead and hit a child in a minute, before you have a chance to calm down. Your mom was lazy.