What old fashion rules still apply? Which are outdated

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Even Kate Middleton sometimes wears bare legs with open-toed sandals, including when Queen Elizabeth was still alive. That’s the final word on class, so bare legs are fine.

Sure, bare legs with open toed shoes is fairly standard—particularly in warm weather and with certain less formal dresses (think: sundress).

But Kate typically wears hosiery when dressed up—and always when it’s cold.

Most professional women in an office setting know that naked legs look silly with a dress or skirt suit and heels. And we don’t wear sundresses to the office. Nobody is suggesting wearing pantyhose with sandals to a picnic.

LOL, some of you old ladies would and do.

[Anonymous]

This must be a wasp thread as most of my friends wear diamond studs 24/7.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm 58, white, but grew up lower income. I used to live by those WASP rules, trying to fake it at work, trying to pass as professional. Now, I dress to flatter my body type, which is a bit bumpy and wrinkly these days. And do things that I think are fun and make me happy. I have light blue nail polish on at the moment. Never would have done that 20 years ago.

Ooooh ... going edgy with blue nail polish, Susan!

Found the day drinker.

What? You are both ugly-aggressive and nonsensical.

[Anonymous]

I think there are unspoken anti bright color rules in DC, unless you are a lily pulitzer mom which I am not.

I did a colors app and I am a bright winter so need bright colors all year round, do I’m ditching the DC tyranny of blah and am SO much happier.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I think there are unspoken anti bright color rules in DC, unless you are a lily pulitzer mom which I am not.

I did a colors app and I am a bright winter so need bright colors all year round, do I’m ditching the DC tyranny of blah and am SO much happier.

I used to say "the pink people," but Lily Pulitzer may be more apt.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Everyone who says pantyhose are dead must not have been raised by a mother with class. Full stop.

ICYMI: certain outfits, occasions, and weather require your legs to be covered…and tights aren’t appropriate for certain outfits/settings.

Plus, I guarantee most men prefer seeing a woman in high end silky hosiery at dressy events.

In terms of other rules I follow: no bare shoulders in church. Ever. And no jeans in church.

Well by all means ... let's continue the tradition of wearing horribly uncomfortable things because of how "men prefer seeing a woman."

Gag.

Gentlemen prefer Hanes. Hanes will keep you smooth and silky, shapely…sexy.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Perfume is not only outdated, it instantly brands the wearer as completely clueless. Only tweens and old ladies wear perfume.

I'm neither and I am not giving up my perfume. Call me any name you like, the perfume stays.

Lynne, it’s fine. Do what you want.

I snort laughed.

Lynnette’s DIL here; last visit to your house I found your last two bottles of that high end perfume and tossed it on the rest stop trash on my way home!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Full disclosure, I'm a WASP from Chevy Chase and I grew up with a lot of fashion and etiquette rules that the rest of the country had dropped at least a generation before. Even now, if I showed up wearing a white dress to lunch with my 80 year old father in, say, October there is a 100% chance he'd make a comment about it. I still follow a lot of these rules for my own personal style, but I have lots of friends who dress totally differently and I love that for them. I'm 42 and a stay at home mom.

-I love black tights and wear them all the time in fall/winter. I also like colored tights sometimes. I do actually wear pantyhose but only to church when it's chilly outside, like today. Most people at my church are over 60 anyway.

-I don't wear diamond jewelry in general. I prefer solid gold pieces.

-I don't mix metals. All gold (usually) or all silver tone. This includes handbag hardware. If I'm wearing colored pieces then they should coordinate with the rest of the outfit. For nicer occasions I'd also make sure my nails coordinate.

-Nails are short and should be polished only in light pinks, nudes, coral, red, or burgundy. I might do fuchsia for vacation. No brightly colored eyeshadow or flashy makeup. My grandmother is long dead but she strongly disapproved of red or burgundy lips or nails.

-I don't wear white after Labor Day. I do wear winter white frequently but winter white is a different color than true white.

-I don't mix brown and black. To be fair, I rarely wear brown anything.

-Foundation garments are crucial to looking put together. I wouldn't leave the house without a proper bra and I am evangelical about proper bra fitting. No visible bra straps or lace peeking through a thin shirt. No VPL. Slipshorts are great for under dresses to prevent VPL and for modesty if there is a sudden gust of wind.

-Sneakers should be worn for athletic activity or with athletic clothes. Skirts and dresses should be paired with a proper shoe or a sandal in the summer or spring. Sandals require pedicured toes so I don't wear them very often.

-I don't care about having styled hair. My hair is straight and I don't think it makes much of a difference if I blow dry it or air dry it. I don't dye it but I probably will when I start getting gray hairs.

-Synthetic sweaters are yuck. Real wool (merino, cashmere, etc) only. I would not wear fake leather shoes or bags. Of course cloth or woven shoes and bags are fine.

Writing this has kind of made me realize I might need some therapy.

I grew up in Texas and we followed these rules except the hair- always style your hair- and while I know the stereotype of Texans is to wear a lot of makeup, I grew up with the rule that you always wore makeup (even if you weren’t leaving the house), but only a natural look for day time.

Also, in addition to avoiding synthetic sweaters, there was a rule against fake gold, pearls, diamond, etc. and fake designer goods. Real or nothing.

Today, I follow most of these except I never wear pantyhose (I do still wear tights), wear diamond studs and my engagement ring every day and mix metals. I was probably 40 before I felt comfortable leaving the house without makeup and only do if I’m going to the gym or running a quick errand.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This must be a wasp thread as most of my friends wear diamond studs 24/7.

A lot of people from all walks of life wear diamond studs during the day. At a minimum, that part of the "no diamonds in daytime" rule is definitely outdated.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Everyone who says pantyhose are dead must not have been raised by a mother with class. Full stop.

ICYMI: certain outfits, occasions, and weather require your legs to be covered…and tights aren’t appropriate for certain outfits/settings.

Plus, I guarantee most men prefer seeing a woman in high end silky hosiery at dressy events.

In terms of other rules I follow: no bare shoulders in church. Ever. And no jeans in church.

Well by all means ... let's continue the tradition of wearing horribly uncomfortable things because of how "men prefer seeing a woman."

Gag.

ICYMI - That comment obviously isn’t aimed at dressing for the work place. Rather, it’s meant for all the women who erroneously believe they look better bare-legged in a cocktail dress. Presumably you are dressing up for a night on the town and want to look appealing. If you think your naked legs look better than high end hosiery when wearing a cocktail dress, you might want to see what your husband thinks. That’s all.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I feel like the old rich ladies have ruined this thread.

OP, I am American of South Asian ancestry. I wear far more diamonds than these ladies can even imagine. I don't understand why wealthy white ladies feel like they should hoard their jewelry instead of wearing it. So dumb!! If you own it, you should wear it, no rules!!

Happy to not be white so I don't have to follow your stupid white people rules!!!!

Interesting take - I’m UC Japanese and pretty much all of these apply back home. There are a few additional things like pretty much never showing your toes or knees. Also in certain settings you don’t wear rings because ceramics are so important in our culture and pervasive, and any metal knocking on them could hit an air pocket and damage them. If you happened to be wearing a ring and found yourself in a setting where you’re handling ceramics (which just somehow happens all the time), you would remove it first, even if it’s your wedding ring.

Big differences:
Pierced ears are trashy and uncivilized.
Dyeing your hair to cover your grays is acceptable forever.
Light daily makeup is okay.
Tighter palette of “acceptable” colors to wear, especially as you get older (boring!!)
Evoking the season is very important culturally, so there’s a smaller range of what is acceptable as “seasonless” in a wardrobe. Things like the weight of the wool crepe matter.
The decades-old, scruffy, mended wool sweater is not for going out in public, unless it’s the barn.
A 1 ct diamond engagement ring that is worn all the time is borderline tacky for being too big, but it’s totally okay to have an enormous and super expensive engagement ring that you never wear.
Pantyhose is alive and well. For the PP talking about swampiness vis-a-via hose-wearing…knee-highs are a very popular choice in JP.
For older people, denim is still an expression of rebellion a little bit!
My mother seems to think pearls are for evening or funerals but that might just be her.

A lot of the above is not class-specific. There are tons of other cultural rules like how bags and shoes for a funeral should always be cloth only and never leather, bc leather is too in-your-face “dead animal” and therefore inappropriate.

I think fewer people here are really looking at me and making any assessments about my background as the self-proclaimed WASPy PP above says (“what hospital” is also a question in Tokyo lol!). Sometimes people seem to see “Asian” first and whatever their own associations are that come along with that, which may not have a lot to do with me. So I go ahead and indulge a little bit, because it doesn’t really matter. Right now I have a bigger mixed metal ring that is part of my daily jewelry (although I’d still never wear it on my middle finger!). I have some suede flats that I wear at the wrong time so I don’t have to replace my other ones. I wear bright colors when they make me feel happy. I have a small diamond solitaire necklace that I sometimes wear during the day because it helps me feel put together. Tennis shoes are fine when running around after my toddler, regardless of what else I’m wearing.

This was the most interesting post so far in this thread, especially the part about ceramics and jeans. Interesting/funny!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Everyone who says pantyhose are dead must not have been raised by a mother with class. Full stop.

ICYMI: certain outfits, occasions, and weather require your legs to be covered…and tights aren’t appropriate for certain outfits/settings.

Plus, I guarantee most men prefer seeing a woman in high end silky hosiery at dressy events.

In terms of other rules I follow: no bare shoulders in church. Ever. And no jeans in church.

Well by all means ... let's continue the tradition of wearing horribly uncomfortable things because of how "men prefer seeing a woman."

Gag.

ICYMI - That comment obviously isn’t aimed at dressing for the work place. Rather, it’s meant for all the women who erroneously believe they look better bare-legged in a cocktail dress. Presumably you are dressing up for a night on the town and want to look appealing. If you think your naked legs look better than high end hosiery when wearing a cocktail dress, you might want to see what your husband thinks. That’s all.

ICYMI- your follow-up post didn't make anything sound better.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Everyone who says pantyhose are dead must not have been raised by a mother with class. Full stop.

ICYMI: certain outfits, occasions, and weather require your legs to be covered…and tights aren’t appropriate for certain outfits/settings.

Plus, I guarantee most men prefer seeing a woman in high end silky hosiery at dressy events.

In terms of other rules I follow: no bare shoulders in church. Ever. And no jeans in church.

Well by all means ... let's continue the tradition of wearing horribly uncomfortable things because of how "men prefer seeing a woman."

Gag.

ICYMI - That comment obviously isn’t aimed at dressing for the work place. Rather, it’s meant for all the women who erroneously believe they look better bare-legged in a cocktail dress. Presumably you are dressing up for a night on the town and want to look appealing. If you think your naked legs look better than high end hosiery when wearing a cocktail dress, you might want to see what your husband thinks. That’s all.

ICYMI- your follow-up post didn't make anything sound better.

DP. +1 See what my husband thinks? Lol.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Full disclosure, I'm a WASP from Chevy Chase and I grew up with a lot of fashion and etiquette rules that the rest of the country had dropped at least a generation before. Even now, if I showed up wearing a white dress to lunch with my 80 year old father in, say, October there is a 100% chance he'd make a comment about it. I still follow a lot of these rules for my own personal style, but I have lots of friends who dress totally differently and I love that for them. I'm 42 and a stay at home mom.

-I love black tights and wear them all the time in fall/winter. I also like colored tights sometimes. I do actually wear pantyhose but only to church when it's chilly outside, like today. Most people at my church are over 60 anyway.

-I don't wear diamond jewelry in general. I prefer solid gold pieces.

-I don't mix metals. All gold (usually) or all silver tone. This includes handbag hardware. If I'm wearing colored pieces then they should coordinate with the rest of the outfit. For nicer occasions I'd also make sure my nails coordinate.

-Nails are short and should be polished only in light pinks, nudes, coral, red, or burgundy. I might do fuchsia for vacation. No brightly colored eyeshadow or flashy makeup. My grandmother is long dead but she strongly disapproved of red or burgundy lips or nails.

-I don't wear white after Labor Day. I do wear winter white frequently but winter white is a different color than true white.

-I don't mix brown and black. To be fair, I rarely wear brown anything.

-Foundation garments are crucial to looking put together. I wouldn't leave the house without a proper bra and I am evangelical about proper bra fitting. No visible bra straps or lace peeking through a thin shirt. No VPL. Slipshorts are great for under dresses to prevent VPL and for modesty if there is a sudden gust of wind.

-Sneakers should be worn for athletic activity or with athletic clothes. Skirts and dresses should be paired with a proper shoe or a sandal in the summer or spring. Sandals require pedicured toes so I don't wear them very often.

-I don't care about having styled hair. My hair is straight and I don't think it makes much of a difference if I blow dry it or air dry it. I don't dye it but I probably will when I start getting gray hairs.

-Synthetic sweaters are yuck. Real wool (merino, cashmere, etc) only. I would not wear fake leather shoes or bags. Of course cloth or woven shoes and bags are fine.

Writing this has kind of made me realize I might need some therapy.

I'm 47 and WASP. Much of what you say rings true for me too. However I do wear my casual white Veja shoes still after Labor Day. It's still hot after Labor Day and I don't always have a nice pedicure for my sandals, so I substitute. I also have to admit I love how pantyhose makes my legs look awesome and flawless.

Another rule I'm happy to break (if it's indeed a rule), I wear diamond studs everyday all day. I don't have the extra capacity to think too hard about my jewelry, so nothing or studs, unless there is a special occasion.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I think there are unspoken anti bright color rules in DC, unless you are a lily pulitzer mom which I am not.

I did a colors app and I am a bright winter so need bright colors all year round, do I’m ditching the DC tyranny of blah and am SO much happier.

i saw someone on one of the fashion reddits saying one day she woke up and realized she’d been in a beige coma for several years.