What old fashion rules still apply? Which are outdated

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Full disclosure, I'm a WASP from Chevy Chase and I grew up with a lot of fashion and etiquette rules that the rest of the country had dropped at least a generation before. Even now, if I showed up wearing a white dress to lunch with my 80 year old father in, say, October there is a 100% chance he'd make a comment about it. I still follow a lot of these rules for my own personal style, but I have lots of friends who dress totally differently and I love that for them. I'm 42 and a stay at home mom.

-I love black tights and wear them all the time in fall/winter. I also like colored tights sometimes. I do actually wear pantyhose but only to church when it's chilly outside, like today. Most people at my church are over 60 anyway.

-I don't wear diamond jewelry in general. I prefer solid gold pieces.

-I don't mix metals. All gold (usually) or all silver tone. This includes handbag hardware. If I'm wearing colored pieces then they should coordinate with the rest of the outfit. For nicer occasions I'd also make sure my nails coordinate.

-Nails are short and should be polished only in light pinks, nudes, coral, red, or burgundy. I might do fuchsia for vacation. No brightly colored eyeshadow or flashy makeup. My grandmother is long dead but she strongly disapproved of red or burgundy lips or nails.

-I don't wear white after Labor Day. I do wear winter white frequently but winter white is a different color than true white.

-I don't mix brown and black. To be fair, I rarely wear brown anything.

-Foundation garments are crucial to looking put together. I wouldn't leave the house without a proper bra and I am evangelical about proper bra fitting. No visible bra straps or lace peeking through a thin shirt. No VPL. Slipshorts are great for under dresses to prevent VPL and for modesty if there is a sudden gust of wind.

-Sneakers should be worn for athletic activity or with athletic clothes. Skirts and dresses should be paired with a proper shoe or a sandal in the summer or spring. Sandals require pedicured toes so I don't wear them very often.

-I don't care about having styled hair. My hair is straight and I don't think it makes much of a difference if I blow dry it or air dry it. I don't dye it but I probably will when I start getting gray hairs.

-Synthetic sweaters are yuck. Real wool (merino, cashmere, etc) only. I would not wear fake leather shoes or bags. Of course cloth or woven shoes and bags are fine.

Writing this has kind of made me realize I might need some therapy.

Fellow WASP here, I am with you on most of these.

NP. WASP (55) raised by a Silent Gen military protocol officer and a Southern Belle - so double whammy of strict adherence to proper dress and etiquette. I agree with all above and will add:

- tuxedos are improper for weddings that take place before 6 p.m. (My late father insisted that for my own noon wedding that the men wear
rented morning suits)

- strapless wedding gowns are improper for a church wedding.

- absolutely no cleavage should be shown in women’s professional clothing. (This is tough for me as I’m voluptuous and have to get professionally fitted bras, have tanks and camisoles to conceal)

- rules of scale should be followed based upon your height and frame.

YES.

There is a reason that big tux-rental company is called "After Six."

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I feel like the old rich ladies have ruined this thread.

OP, I am American of South Asian ancestry. I wear far more diamonds than these ladies can even imagine. I don't understand why wealthy white ladies feel like they should hoard their jewelry instead of wearing it. So dumb!! If you own it, you should wear it, no rules!!

Happy to not be white so I don't have to follow your stupid white people rules!!!!

White person here.

These are white-person rules circa 1962.

No one, not even us white people, need to follow them. Or should follow them. New rules that these women seem stupidly unaware of apply.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Interesting so far… for all the self-identified WASP posters, do you judge women if they are breaking these rules? Any rule more than others?

I'm the long winded 12:08 PP

As I mentioned in my post, I strongly support women dressing in a way that makes them feel good and confident. If you like blue glitter eyeshadow, more power to you!

These rules apply to a subculture, not the general public.

I would notice and yeah, probably judge, a woman with visible bra straps and purple hair at an event at a country club. It would be a tone deaf way to present oneself and not appropriate to the venue. If she wanted to wear that to a Pride parade it would be fabulous!

Wow, the homophobia here and (bizarrely incorrect) stereotyping ...

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'm surprised this has continued:

Don't wear the same formal dress more than once, unless you wear it to an event with completely different people. (I imagine this is hard nowadays with social media showing everyone what you have worn.)

This was a rule I followed as a teen/20s, and my teen daughter follows it too.

How privileged she is to be able to afford multiple dresses.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Everyone who says pantyhose are dead must not have been raised by a mother with class. Full stop.

ICYMI: certain outfits, occasions, and weather require your legs to be covered…and tights aren’t appropriate for certain outfits/settings.

Plus, I guarantee most men prefer seeing a woman in high end silky hosiery at dressy events.

In terms of other rules I follow: no bare shoulders in church. Ever. And no jeans in church.

Well by all means ... let's continue the tradition of wearing horribly uncomfortable things because of how "men prefer seeing a woman."

Gag.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Interesting so far… for all the self-identified WASP posters, do you judge women if they are breaking these rules? Any rule more than others?

I'm the long winded 12:08 PP

As I mentioned in my post, I strongly support women dressing in a way that makes them feel good and confident. If you like blue glitter eyeshadow, more power to you!

These rules apply to a subculture, not the general public.

I would notice and yeah, probably judge, a woman with visible bra straps and purple hair at an event at a country club. It would be a tone deaf way to present oneself and not appropriate to the venue. If she wanted to wear that to a Pride parade it would be fabulous!

Not really, no.

Wow, the homophobia here and (bizarrely incorrect) stereotyping ...

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Pantyhose equals a stinky crotch. Which is always out of class. Sorry waspy ladies, but there's nothing high class or good etiquette about that disgusting unhygienic mess.

PS nothing misogynistic about this comment, because i'm advocating for the natural approach, and not some bizarre synthetic, man-made vagina trap.

It's been so long since I've worn pantyhose that I'd forgotten about his.

Yeah, this is a huge reason to not wear them. Ever.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Everyone who says pantyhose are dead must not have been raised by a mother with class. Full stop.

ICYMI: certain outfits, occasions, and weather require your legs to be covered…and tights aren’t appropriate for certain outfits/settings.

Plus, I guarantee most men prefer seeing a woman in high end silky hosiery at dressy events.

In terms of other rules I follow: no bare shoulders in church. Ever. And no jeans in church.

Anyone who talks about the class level of others is by definition low class.

…said the insecure woman who wasn’t raised to understand the unwritten rules embraced by classy people who run the world.

Pretty sure that is you ^^.

DP

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Interesting so far… for all the self-identified WASP posters, do you judge women if they are breaking these rules? Any rule more than others?

I'm the long winded 12:08 PP

As I mentioned in my post, I strongly support women dressing in a way that makes them feel good and confident. If you like blue glitter eyeshadow, more power to you!

These rules apply to a subculture, not the general public.

I would notice and yeah, probably judge, a woman with visible bra straps and purple hair at an event at a country club. It would be a tone deaf way to present oneself and not appropriate to the venue. If she wanted to wear that to a Pride parade it would be fabulous!

Not really, no.

Wow, the homophobia here and (bizarrely incorrect) stereotyping ...

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'm 58, white, but grew up lower income. I used to live by those WASP rules, trying to fake it at work, trying to pass as professional. Now, I dress to flatter my body type, which is a bit bumpy and wrinkly these days. And do things that I think are fun and make me happy. I have light blue nail polish on at the moment. Never would have done that 20 years ago.

Ooooh ... going edgy with blue nail polish, Susan!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm 58, white, but grew up lower income. I used to live by those WASP rules, trying to fake it at work, trying to pass as professional. Now, I dress to flatter my body type, which is a bit bumpy and wrinkly these days. And do things that I think are fun and make me happy. I have light blue nail polish on at the moment. Never would have done that 20 years ago.

Ooooh ... going edgy with blue nail polish, Susan!

Found the day drinker.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm surprised this has continued:

Don't wear the same formal dress more than once, unless you wear it to an event with completely different people. (I imagine this is hard nowadays with social media showing everyone what you have worn.)

This was a rule I followed as a teen/20s, and my teen daughter follows it too.

How privileged she is to be able to afford multiple dresses.

Even the women in the BRF repeat dresses at events from time to time!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Everyone who says pantyhose are dead must not have been raised by a mother with class. Full stop.

ICYMI: certain outfits, occasions, and weather require your legs to be covered…and tights aren’t appropriate for certain outfits/settings.

Plus, I guarantee most men prefer seeing a woman in high end silky hosiery at dressy events.

In terms of other rules I follow: no bare shoulders in church. Ever. And no jeans in church.

A man with a pantyhose f*tish wrote this 100%.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm 58, white, but grew up lower income. I used to live by those WASP rules, trying to fake it at work, trying to pass as professional. Now, I dress to flatter my body type, which is a bit bumpy and wrinkly these days. And do things that I think are fun and make me happy. I have light blue nail polish on at the moment. Never would have done that 20 years ago.

Ooooh ... going edgy with blue nail polish, Susan!

Found the day drinker.

Yeah and I'm pretty sure the whole slew of snarky comments from around that timestamp are the same person.

[Anonymous]

These rules are tired and outdated. I have a single stone diamond necklace that I never take off - it goes with everything and is not flashy, and I could not care less if some self-righteous WASP thinks it’s gauche.