Culture for Girls at Southern Schools

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:She needs to go to college in a major city. LA, Boston, NY.

All the girls at the SEC schools we toured seemed really, really happy, even the ones that dod not look like a stereotypical 'Bama sorority rush poster.

If she liked the southern university, let her apply and see what happens. She might meet some really kind, happy, interesting friends at those places.

That's because in the south girls are taught to smile constantly, no matter how happy or unhappy. As I was.

+1. And we were also taught that men are perfect.

Yes. And that it's really important to act happy all the time so you can "get a man." Girls are supposed to be cheery and happy non stop.

I decided not to marry a man from the South after I graduated from college.

Sorry the Southern men didn't dig you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:She needs to go to college in a major city. LA, Boston, NY.

All the girls at the SEC schools we toured seemed really, really happy, even the ones that dod not look like a stereotypical 'Bama sorority rush poster.

If she liked the southern university, let her apply and see what happens. She might meet some really kind, happy, interesting friends at those places.

That's because in the south girls are taught to smile constantly, no matter how happy or unhappy. As I was.

+1. And we were also taught that men are perfect.

Yes. And that it's really important to act happy all the time so you can "get a man." Girls are supposed to be cheery and happy non stop.

I decided not to marry a man from the South after I graduated from college.

Sorry the Southern men didn't dig you.

OP - sorry you have nothing better to do than to insult people on the internet. There have been so many helpful and illuminating contributions on this string; yours is decidedly not one of them.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Your kid will be totally fine at Rice and Emory. That kind of culture isn’t predominant at either school. Duke is probably fine too. I knew a mechanical engineer from there and she was not a sorority girl at all, and she was so smart.

Private southern schools in the next two tiers down like Tulane SMU and UMiami should really be avoided. Whether in Greek or not, wealth and the display of wealth and the vibe that comes with all that definitely predominates those schools.
Find your safeties up north.

It’s always amusing that people in the DC area lust after the Ivy League because of the supposed “connections” with the rich that their kid can make there, but think wealthy southern schools should be avoided because of the wealth of the student bodies. These rich Southern schools are the best place to become connected with people who will help you be successful post college. It’s even funnier now that the Ivy League schools have done everything they can to isolate themselves from their rich & successful alumni. Studies that showed that poor kids benefitted more from attending Ivy League schools than lower ranked schools (and showed no such benefit for wealthier kids) were clear that it was the social connections they benefitted from, not the quality of the education. Historically, people didn’t want to go to Harvard to associate with other poor kids, however smart they may be. It’s now especially funny considering that Harvard (and others) have eliminated one major selling point for their university and in the process lowered their academic standards to do so.

Huh? Average SAT at Harvard for last year's class is 1550 with 83% submitting...nearly all have 4.0 in HS.

How is that a "low" academic standard?

Isn't harvard still test optional?

There are lots of low scores at the test optional schools. The scores look high because the only people submitting at test optional schools are the ones over 1500.

Are you a moron?

PP said it’s a 1550 with 83% of the kids submitting test scores.

Like it’s right there in plain English.

I hope you don't talk to people like this in real life.

Please remember that there are actual live individuals reading and writing these posts. Having a hard time seeing the value this sort of attitude adds.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:She needs to go to college in a major city. LA, Boston, NY.

All the girls at the SEC schools we toured seemed really, really happy, even the ones that dod not look like a stereotypical 'Bama sorority rush poster.

If she liked the southern university, let her apply and see what happens. She might meet some really kind, happy, interesting friends at those places.

That's because in the south girls are taught to smile constantly, no matter how happy or unhappy. As I was.

+1. And we were also taught that men are perfect.

Yes. And that it's really important to act happy all the time so you can "get a man." Girls are supposed to be cheery and happy non stop.

I decided not to marry a man from the South after I graduated from college.

Sorry the Southern men didn't dig you.

Girls should act cheery and happy non-stop. So should boys. Life is too short not to be happy and cheery. Or to appear thus.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:There was a string about Vanderbilt and how the girls at Vanderbilt, like a lot of schools in the south, dress up for sorority rush and other social events and that may not be the right setting for every girl. I'm not trying to bash Vanderbilt; I just found this article illuminating:

https://vanderbilthustler.com/2019/01/13/our-campus-culture-pressures-women-into-unhealthy-relationships-with-food-and-their-bodies/

I have a junior daughter who is interested in Duke, Emory, Rice and possibly Vanderbilt. Do all of these schools also have that type of school culture around girls and appearances?

We are Asian American and my daughter has been sad to not "fit in" with the popular girls at her high school, many of whom are tall, blond, skinny, etc. so I would like - if possible - to steer her away from that culture for college.

Of those 4, Duke might be the best fit. Plus they have large number of Asian American students. They have greek life but it isn't anything like SEC schools like Vanderbilt.

Rice, Emory, and Vanderbilt all have a higher percentage of Asian students than Duke.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don't think "southern culture" really exists any more. It's just a stereotype that DCUM loves to hate.

I feel sure that there are other female social groups at Vanderbilt besides "tall skinny blondes"...

DP. Are you kidding?

“Southern culture” is having a moment, and lives loud and proud at quite a few colleges.

—Lives in the south (reluctantly)

Not kidding at all. "The South" now has the same strip malls and chain stores as everywhere else, and most of the students in "southern" schools have the same attitudes as suburban NoVA kids. (Indeed, at UVA, many of the students ARE suburban NoVA kids.)

Among other things, the demographics of the South has profoundly changed, and "culture" is downstream from demographics.

What do you mean by this?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:In order of the number of sorority dimes on campus and their sway over the social scene:

Vanderbilt
Duke
Emory
Rice

Rice in particular has no Greek system and attracts a nerdier crowd, but it's VERY woke, and the Overton window of acceptable views on campus covers only the far left end of the political spectrum. I personally know of a pro-Israel Jewish student who had to finish his last semester online because he was being harassed by the pro-Hamas crowd to the point that it was impacting his education and mental health.

Foyine girls (TA) guy, are you from the South? I pegged you as Jersey.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Some of you can’t seem to comprehend that there actually are more than a few young people who don’t want to spend 4 years screeching into bullhorns & burning American flags.

Some of you can't comprehend that it's possible to have a normal day and go about your business while people protest nearby.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:There was a string about Vanderbilt and how the girls at Vanderbilt, like a lot of schools in the south, dress up for sorority rush and other social events and that may not be the right setting for every girl. I'm not trying to bash Vanderbilt; I just found this article illuminating:

https://vanderbilthustler.com/2019/01/13/our-campus-culture-pressures-women-into-unhealthy-relationships-with-food-and-their-bodies/

I have a junior daughter who is interested in Duke, Emory, Rice and possibly Vanderbilt. Do all of these schools also have that type of school culture around girls and appearances?

We are Asian American and my daughter has been sad to not "fit in" with the popular girls at her high school, many of whom are tall, blond, skinny, etc. so I would like - if possible - to steer her away from that culture for college.

Of those 4, Duke might be the best fit. Plus they have large number of Asian American students. They have greek life but it isn't anything like SEC schools like Vanderbilt.

Rice, Emory, and Vanderbilt all have a higher percentage of Asian students than Duke.

DP Duke would be a bad fit. It is for rich sheltered conformity.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have a hs senior dd and had similar questions and concerns. From my anecdotal research (speaking with current college students and parents), the social scene at many (but not all) of the top private and public schools is pretty cliquey and dominated by wealthy, attractive, popular kids - often from private/prep schools. You don't have to be blond, but it does help if you are wealthy and attractive. Even girls who are not 'dresssed up' often wear designer jewelry and accessories. Its kind of crazy. These kids have already identified each other on social media before arriving on campus. Duke and Vanderbilt for sure are like this. Rice no, bc no greek and student body is very different. Emory- not as bad. It's not a southern thing. It's a wealthy/private school thing. You don't have to he part of it, but it is good for kids to think about how they can see themselves having fun outside those groups if they prevail on campus. There are plenty of non greek and non girly girls at duke amd vandy, you just have to find your group. I think it's sad, but it's the reality these kids face.

It is a southern thing. No such culture at Yale, Harvard, even schools like Case Western, Skidmore, Tufts.

100% a Southern thing.

My kid (stereotypical wealthy, attractive popular kid) is at a NESCAC and was just talking about this subject. UNlike in HS there is no "cool crowd" and that kids who try to be "cool" are joked about as "not real people". There are athletic groups and some "lax bros" but overall she finds things much more chill. I think that the lack of a Greek system helps keep things in check.

DS is at a NESCAC and he says there are definitely strong cliques, and if you're not in one of them, you'll feel quite socially isolated.

I went to Hamilton and liked it, but yeah...it was cliquey as hell. You definitely knew who the cool kids were.

I went to Hamilton as well. My friends and I used to joke that it was high school 2.0. Other SLACs can feel that way, but everyone's experience is different. Hamilton does have (or had) a lot of rich, private school kids who definitely all knew each other. Grinell or Oberlin may have a different social scene.

[Anonymous]

If you send a DD to a red state for college you are a complete and utter failure as a parent.

[Anonymous]

Rice is very weird and nerdy like CMU. Emorys students are similar to Georgetown, like a mix between Georgetown and Vanderbilt. Vanderbilt is very preppy like Duke but with more attractive students, and Duke is Duke.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:SEC schools are extremely popular now and this trend will continue. Lots of Northeast and Midwest kids want to dress up and socialize with friends at fun football tailgates. Don’t see the appeal of campus protests at schools located in unattractive locations. Duke has a distinct vibe very athletic and fun seeking kids glad it’s not Rice.

This.

You are only young once. You should enjoy your college experience instead of spending it trying to make it through a firewall of angry protesters when just trying to get to you calculus final.

Not accurate in the slightest, but I guess if forced to choose I’ll take that over what I read on one of the southern school reddits today about Greek life - lots of SA and lots of hazing, very creative, pledges sitting in a hole of excrement.

I think people are really overestimating the protest situation at most schools. My kid goes to a school in Midwest considered liberal but the protests are sort of a non issue. Very occasional and limited in time, space and manner.

+ 1. My son attends a large state university in the NE, he says the same.

[Anonymous]

Emory is very Asian, possibly the most “Asian” of all the medium-sized private Southern universities. However, UGA and GA Tech also have a very large cohort of Asian/Asian-American students. UGA is large and Diverse enough that everyone can find their niche and their people outside the Greek scene.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Your kid will be totally fine at Rice and Emory. That kind of culture isn’t predominant at either school. Duke is probably fine too. I knew a mechanical engineer from there and she was not a sorority girl at all, and she was so smart.

Private southern schools in the next two tiers down like Tulane SMU and UMiami should really be avoided. Whether in Greek or not, wealth and the display of wealth and the vibe that comes with all that definitely predominates those schools.
Find your safeties up north.

It’s always amusing that people in the DC area lust after the Ivy League because of the supposed “connections” with the rich that their kid can make there, but think wealthy southern schools should be avoided because of the wealth of the student bodies. These rich Southern schools are the best place to become connected with people who will help you be successful post college. It’s even funnier now that the Ivy League schools have done everything they can to isolate themselves from their rich & successful alumni. Studies that showed that poor kids benefitted more from attending Ivy League schools than lower ranked schools (and showed no such benefit for wealthier kids) were clear that it was the social connections they benefitted from, not the quality of the education. Historically, people didn’t want to go to Harvard to associate with other poor kids, however smart they may be. It’s now especially funny considering that Harvard (and others) have eliminated one major selling point for their university and in the process lowered their academic standards to do so.

Huh? Average SAT at Harvard for last year's class is 1550 with 83% submitting...nearly all have 4.0 in HS.

How is that a "low" academic standard?

Isn't harvard still test optional?

There are lots of low scores at the test optional schools. The scores look high because the only people submitting at test optional schools are the ones over 1500.

Are you a moron?

PP said it’s a 1550 with 83% of the kids submitting test scores.

Like it’s right there in plain English.

I hope you don't talk to people like this in real life.

Please remember that there are actual live individuals reading and writing these posts. Having a hard time seeing the value this sort of attitude adds.

Ok…next time I will just call them a dipshit.