60% of girls say they want college, only 46% of boys

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Boys were more academically successful back then for a number of reasons. I tried to limit my son’s screen time and encourage books and trips to the library and local cultural events. I refused to let him have an IPAD or phone until he was older- and I got pushback from a lot of people fir that. Whether any of this made a difference, I don’t know (he’s ‘24), but I think we as a society have normalized dependence on electronics for young kids. It can be even more challenging for boys who aren’t interested in sports- at least sports get kids away from their electronics.

What are the reasons?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm sorry, but it's not a systemic thing, it's BAD PARENTING. Parents have just assumed for so long that their boys are going to do well that they have been completely ignoring them throughout their entire childhoods, and then they become young men, and boom! Boymoms blame the system instead of themselves for not encouraging independence and providing enrichment for them. Want STEM for your boys? Find clubs for them to join, there are plenty - look at all the First Lego leagues. Want outdoorsmanship for your boys? Surprise! There's Boy Scouts (or whatever it's called now). Want your boy to do track and field? Rec leagues offer a million and five sports options every season! Art classes accept boys, all the math enrichment programs accept boys, all sort of things available to your boys, ladies, STOP IGNORNIG THEM.

You either do not have a son, or you are one of a small minority who has some kind of fall in line, do only as moms and teachers say type. I paid immense amounts of attention to my son. To the OP's point, it was actually to the detriment of my daughter two years younger than him. He required so much attention--and as a college senior limping to the finish line, still does. Our schools went so far in accommodating the learning styles of girls that boys have been left far far behind. My son is objectively (I know, we had to have him tested three times) extremely intelligent. Far more so than my daughter. But he failed at so many things in school that his self-esteem was in the basement. Now that he has matured, he recognizes clearly what happened. He doesn't blame women, fortunately, but he has so much regret that he wasn't able to better advocate for himself, rather than spending his first 18 years of life constantly berated and demeaned by teachers. My husband and I were just noticing last night that of the 6 or so boys who all grew together in our neighborhood, every single one of them has struggled to finish college. Two of them look like they won't make it. They were just so ground down going through school they have nothing left to keep going.

Can you please explain what you mean by "the learning style of girls"?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Boys were more academically successful back then for a number of reasons. I tried to limit my son’s screen time and encourage books and trips to the library and local cultural events. I refused to let him have an IPAD or phone until he was older- and I got pushback from a lot of people fir that. Whether any of this made a difference, I don’t know (he’s ‘24), but I think we as a society have normalized dependence on electronics for young kids. It can be even more challenging for boys who aren’t interested in sports- at least sports get kids away from their electronics.

I did all of those things. He has high IQ and low processing speed,which is not from too much screen use and not enough time reading. We emphasized limited screens and lots of reading his whole childhood. You all can make us parents of ADHD boys out to be horrible parents all you like. My son is brilliant. School was a nightmare and maybe two teachers his entire childhood could have cared less how smart he is.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:So … basically most boys need DEI to compete with girls. Otherwise the girls blow them out of the water.

Mediocre white boys and men were able to succeed despite their mediocrity for hundreds of years. As soon as the tables started to turn, they went MAGA.

No, the school system is no longer geared toward the way biology enables them to learn and develop. Instead of active learning, athletics, camaraderie, they are forced to sit for 8 straight hours being yelled at and humiliated by purple-haired women who feel like they finally have control over men. It's pathetic.

I'm sorry but I'm 48 years old and never has "active learning", athletics, and camaraderie been the teaching style in the United States.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Boys were more academically successful back then for a number of reasons. I tried to limit my son’s screen time and encourage books and trips to the library and local cultural events. I refused to let him have an IPAD or phone until he was older- and I got pushback from a lot of people fir that. Whether any of this made a difference, I don’t know (he’s ‘24), but I think we as a society have normalized dependence on electronics for young kids. It can be even more challenging for boys who aren’t interested in sports- at least sports get kids away from their electronics.

What are the reasons?

Higher expectations, stronger sense of community, kids (both genders) had a sense that multiple people had their eyes on them, more accountability, better social supports…and less emphasis on academics at an early age.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm sorry, but it's not a systemic thing, it's BAD PARENTING. Parents have just assumed for so long that their boys are going to do well that they have been completely ignoring them throughout their entire childhoods, and then they become young men, and boom! Boymoms blame the system instead of themselves for not encouraging independence and providing enrichment for them. Want STEM for your boys? Find clubs for them to join, there are plenty - look at all the First Lego leagues. Want outdoorsmanship for your boys? Surprise! There's Boy Scouts (or whatever it's called now). Want your boy to do track and field? Rec leagues offer a million and five sports options every season! Art classes accept boys, all the math enrichment programs accept boys, all sort of things available to your boys, ladies, STOP IGNORNIG THEM.

+1. It’s a lot easier to blame others and the system for your parenting failure. There are no shortages of opportunities for white boys. They fail because their parents enabled them.

Where is the evidence that parents of girls parent better?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Boys were more academically successful back then for a number of reasons. I tried to limit my son’s screen time and encourage books and trips to the library and local cultural events. I refused to let him have an IPAD or phone until he was older- and I got pushback from a lot of people fir that. Whether any of this made a difference, I don’t know (he’s ‘24), but I think we as a society have normalized dependence on electronics for young kids. It can be even more challenging for boys who aren’t interested in sports- at least sports get kids away from their electronics.

I did all of those things. He has high IQ and low processing speed,which is not from too much screen use and not enough time reading. We emphasized limited screens and lots of reading his whole childhood. You all can make us parents of ADHD boys out to be horrible parents all you like. My son is brilliant. School was a nightmare and maybe two teachers his entire childhood could have cared less how smart he is.

It’s not what individual parents are doing or not doing. It’s not one specific thing. If the issue of boys falling behind is this widespread, then there are bigger, multiple factors at play. There are lots of brilliant kids whose talents aren’t recognized because of the way our education system is. What is encouraging is that there’s a lot more awareness about ADHD and learning challenges and that many parents and some schools are trying to do something about it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:So … basically most boys need DEI to compete with girls. Otherwise the girls blow them out of the water.

Mediocre white boys and men were able to succeed despite their mediocrity for hundreds of years. As soon as the tables started to turn, they went MAGA.

No, the school system is no longer geared toward the way biology enables them to learn and develop. Instead of active learning, athletics, camaraderie, they are forced to sit for 8 straight hours being yelled at and humiliated by purple-haired women who feel like they finally have control over men. It's pathetic.

I'm sorry but I'm 48 years old and never has "active learning", athletics, and camaraderie been the teaching style in the United States.

Let’s be clear. It’s the (imaginary) purple haired women that are the real problem for the PP. He just added in the rest to sound like he knows what he’s talking about.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Discussed before
Boys = minority group in college
why there's a group of magas steering the country into what we have.
As Laura Bush (yes a first lady at the beginning on the 21st century) said something along the lines of we are focusing on the young girls which we should, but we should also be concerned about the young boys. Well, she wasn't wrong to have worried about them.
#getyourboytoattendcollegeANDgraduate

100%%%%. I said that all of the time. Laura Bush was rightly focusing on boys falling behind—especially her reading initiatives and the school systems designed to the way girls learn/develop. And, Laura has only daughters, btw. We had take your daughters to work (changed eventually to child), girls on the run, girls in stem, as nauseum

I’m a female PhD (in my 50s) and I played competitive college sports, etc. I had no problem in that realm.

We started just medicating every boy that couldn’t sit still in kindergarten and first grade. Labeling them all toxic..until what we did eventually came to fruition in MAGA-types

I voted Harris—but I am not dense enough to not notice why Trump was able to win

I agree that education has become feminized. However, I think it's actually social changes for adults (particularly the lack of high-paying jobs for high school educated men) that have created the larger issues.

I really want people to explain what this means - I see no difference in education other than teachers and administrators are no longer able to discipline boys and parents don't seem to be doing it at home, so their behavior in the classroom has gotten out of control..

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm sorry, but it's not a systemic thing, it's BAD PARENTING. Parents have just assumed for so long that their boys are going to do well that they have been completely ignoring them throughout their entire childhoods, and then they become young men, and boom! Boymoms blame the system instead of themselves for not encouraging independence and providing enrichment for them. Want STEM for your boys? Find clubs for them to join, there are plenty - look at all the First Lego leagues. Want outdoorsmanship for your boys? Surprise! There's Boy Scouts (or whatever it's called now). Want your boy to do track and field? Rec leagues offer a million and five sports options every season! Art classes accept boys, all the math enrichment programs accept boys, all sort of things available to your boys, ladies, STOP IGNORNIG THEM.

+1. It’s a lot easier to blame others and the system for your parenting failure. There are no shortages of opportunities for white boys. They fail because their parents enabled them.

Where is the evidence that parents of girls parent better?

+1
I have polite, smart sons that got into Ivies unhooked. They have serious grit and empathy for others. Fit, athletic, non-drinkers, etc.

We did a damn good job- lol

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Having a boy really opened my eyes to this issue. My well behaved, introvert, academically inclined DS is completing college a semester early with nearly perfect gpa, and even he ran into the bias against boys in the educational system. He had some wonderful teachers through the years, but he had some that clearly just didn’t like boys. I had friends with boys who were naturally rowdier who really struggled with it.

It has nothing to do with how they do on their academic assignments, but teachers who expect boys to act like girls and penalize them when they don’t and then wonder why they don’t like school. My son has had a great academic career, but I regret not sending him to an all boys school through at least middle school.

I don't have any sons, only daughters but I do agree there is sort if a bias against boys. Lots of teachers are female so that might be one of the reasons. Also I have no doubt that boys raised in divorced families with no fathers or a father figure has had an impact. Bottomline, we need more male role models.

How come boys used to thrive in the classroom then? Back in the baby boomer generation.

They were class presidents, leaders, valedictorians. This was in an era when teachers were female and classroom rules were very strict and prescriptive. Today, students are allowed to make noise and roam around in class. Back then they had be still and quiet.

So, how come boys were more successful academically back then?

How are we ignoring boys? I'd love to know what sorts of programs were cancelled or opportunities that are no longer offered to boys that used to be available?

None. There are none.

Multiple factors. One, we started ignoring boys in our efforts to prop up girls. That's one mistake. Also unlike the baby boomer generation, we have more broken families with boys being raised in homes without dads. Seriously every boy I know who is struggling comes from divorced parents and living with their mom. I know my world is small but let's not ignore the importance of the male role model in raising a boy.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Having a boy really opened my eyes to this issue. My well behaved, introvert, academically inclined DS is completing college a semester early with nearly perfect gpa, and even he ran into the bias against boys in the educational system. He had some wonderful teachers through the years, but he had some that clearly just didn’t like boys. I had friends with boys who were naturally rowdier who really struggled with it.

It has nothing to do with how they do on their academic assignments, but teachers who expect boys to act like girls and penalize them when they don’t and then wonder why they don’t like school. My son has had a great academic career, but I regret not sending him to an all boys school through at least middle school.

I don't have any sons, only daughters but I do agree there is sort if a bias against boys. Lots of teachers are female so that might be one of the reasons. Also I have no doubt that boys raised in divorced families with no fathers or a father figure has had an impact. Bottomline, we need more male role models.

How come boys used to thrive in the classroom then? Back in the baby boomer generation.

They were class presidents, leaders, valedictorians. This was in an era when teachers were female and classroom rules were very strict and prescriptive. Today, students are allowed to make noise and roam around in class. Back then they had be still and quiet.

So, how come boys were more successful academically back then?

Multiple factors. One, we started ignoring boys in our efforts to prop up girls. That's one mistake. Also unlike the baby boomer generation, we have more broken families with boys being raised in homes without dads. Seriously every boy I know who is struggling comes from divorced parents and living with their mom. I know my world is small but let's not ignore the importance of the male role model in raising a boy.

How are we ignoring boys? I'd love to know what sorts of programs were cancelled or opportunities that are no longer offered to boys that used to be available? What have girls taken away from boys??

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Having a boy really opened my eyes to this issue. My well behaved, introvert, academically inclined DS is completing college a semester early with nearly perfect gpa, and even he ran into the bias against boys in the educational system. He had some wonderful teachers through the years, but he had some that clearly just didn’t like boys. I had friends with boys who were naturally rowdier who really struggled with it.

It has nothing to do with how they do on their academic assignments, but teachers who expect boys to act like girls and penalize them when they don’t and then wonder why they don’t like school. My son has had a great academic career, but I regret not sending him to an all boys school through at least middle school.

I don't have any sons, only daughters but I do agree there is sort if a bias against boys. Lots of teachers are female so that might be one of the reasons. Also I have no doubt that boys raised in divorced families with no fathers or a father figure has had an impact. Bottomline, we need more male role models.

How come boys used to thrive in the classroom then? Back in the baby boomer generation.

They were class presidents, leaders, valedictorians. This was in an era when teachers were female and classroom rules were very strict and prescriptive. Today, students are allowed to make noise and roam around in class. Back then they had be still and quiet.

So, how come boys were more successful academically back then?

My vote is increased screen time, decreasing attention span and limiting the ability to be at ease while bored.

100% Mommies here aren't blaming video games and tv, they're blaming girls.

[Anonymous]

Still waiting for people to talk about how teaching has changed to be more advantageous to girls.

[Anonymous]

What kind of male role models do we have in popular culture back in The day? Before, the famous male role models may have been presidents, soldiers, pilots, astronauts. Not sure we have those now…