60% of girls say they want college, only 46% of boys

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

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Anonymous wrote:Discussed before
Boys = minority group in college
why there's a group of magas steering the country into what we have.
As Laura Bush (yes a first lady at the beginning on the 21st century) said something along the lines of we are focusing on the young girls which we should, but we should also be concerned about the young boys. Well, she wasn't wrong to have worried about them.
#getyourboytoattendcollegeANDgraduate

100%%%%. I said that all of the time. Laura Bush was rightly focusing on boys falling behind—especially her reading initiatives and the school systems designed to the way girls learn/develop. And, Laura has only daughters, btw. We had take your daughters to work (changed eventually to child), girls on the run, girls in stem, as nauseum

I’m a female PhD (in my 50s) and I played competitive college sports, etc. I had no problem in that realm.

We started just medicating every boy that couldn’t sit still in kindergarten and first grade. Labeling them all toxic..until what we did eventually came to fruition in MAGA-types

I voted Harris—but I am not dense enough to not notice why Trump was able to win

I happen to have a girl with ADHD and much of what you say is true for her. Our schools are not set up for the way many people (including presumably a lot more boys) learn. For us, the answer is private school.

I’m not sure how things like Women in STEM and Girls in the Run hurt boys. Most of the traditional STEM clubs are male dominated. It almost drove my daughter out of STEM, but a women’s college saved her and gave her the space to explore those interests without being dominated and condescended to by guys.

I think the point the pp was making is that investment in our girls should not be at the detriment of our boys — which for the past several years, maybe the past decade, it has been exactly that. I’m a girl mom and a feminist that can acknowledge the fact that if our highly educated empowered women have no one of equal merit to partner up with we are in trouble as a society

I disagree that investment in girls has come at the detriment at boys.

We should be very worried about boys, they need our attention. We need to get them off the video game addiction, get them reading, get them playing outside and building and making and working together as a team to solve problems. They brain rot in their basements, it’s terrible.

So you are able to acknowledge the pragmatic problems yet cannot see the cultural and systemic undertones that got us here?? You’re an idiot.

NP. We’re not allowed to talk about systemic issues that disfavor any one particular part of the population anymore. Or are we, as long as it’s boys?

The issue I have with this whole “schools are designed for girls” idea is when have schools ever been any different? Even when it was only boys attending school, they were expected to stay in their seats, shut up and pay attention. Things that girls tend to have an easier time with than boys. Boys are probably attending college at the same percentage that they always have. It’s just that now that girls are expected to go as well, more are attending because they don’t struggle as much with the characteristics needed for doing well in school.

Good point.

If you go to an all boys schools, they are expected to sit in their seats and learn. It's about expectations.

Interesting data. Thank you for sharing !

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:Who will our daughters marry then?

No worries, and I say this with all seriousness. Alot of successful, educated women marry “down”. Lots of senior level women at my corporate job have low-achieving husbands, househusbands, SAHD husbands etc. That seems to be the norm among that cohort UNLESS they don’t have kids. In that case, the husband may or may not have a good career like the wife. I can also think of a couple high achieving exec women at work who are single, either via divorce or never married.

Get ready - it’s rough out there. My beautiful Ivy grad daughter is dating a drop out server. Great guy - I’ve grown to be happy for her because at least he’s kind and thoughtful and not a weirdo or ahole. He supports himself, has a car and apt (with roommates). She’s young - who knows where life will go. But many of her friends are in similar situations. Another friend’s Law school daughter is dating an Uber driver. Ivys have high percentages of gay men so that adds to the shortages.

I think young women are going to have to temper their expectations if they want to get married. There just aren't enough high achieving men out there compared to women. It's kind of sad, really.

Ugh. I'm just going to encourage my smart and driven HS senior daughter to stick with her HS boyfriend who is just as ambitious, smart, and plans to go to med school. Hopefully they survive. 😂

[Anonymous]

It is also the Divorce rate causing problems and unwed mothers. Boys have very few role models.

I hired a "kid" he is 36. He is operating at the level of a 23 year male of 1995 and a 15 years old male of 1955.

How is this possible? My uncles literally fought in WWII at 18. They came back from war and literally married HS sweethearts, started their career. By 36 my young flew 40 missions in WWII, was married 14 years, had four kids, house in suburbs, and was a NYC Detective which required a college degree and a test which he got at night while working, having kids, passing detective test and doing all his own home repairs, mowing lawn etc.

I did not go WWII but I went to college (lived at home) worked 20 hours a week during college, graduated. And by 24 I had a department I was running at a big bank with staff. I then got my MBA at night and graduated by 29. Since I worked during college in banking by 29 I had 11 years work experience, a MBA, got promotions, seriously dating a girl I planed to marry and owned a Condo.

The boys today are losers. I have a guy at work who literally has an IVY league degree but go divorced as Mom left him, kids have been a side issue he never addressed. His son is in community college and wants to fix cars. The other lady at work, had fertility issues, babied the one child she had a son, he dropped out of HS!!! She is an executive.

No one is taking the belt to these boys. A strong Dad and a married couple should be beating the sons literally into shape.

[Anonymous]

If your DD finds a smart, driven, responsible, kind guy, tell her to marry him! That’s what I’m telling my DD. I just joined a company and my new staff is filled with 28-43 year old male duds. Dysfunctional dads who want nothing to do with their toddlers, aimless 29 year olds jumping from one profession to another to back to school, mental health issues, divorce, fathers to early pregnancies and broken families. Disaster.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Who will our daughters marry then?

No worries, and I say this with all seriousness. Alot of successful, educated women marry “down”. Lots of senior level women at my corporate job have low-achieving husbands, househusbands, SAHD husbands etc. That seems to be the norm among that cohort UNLESS they don’t have kids. In that case, the husband may or may not have a good career like the wife. I can also think of a couple high achieving exec women at work who are single, either via divorce or never married.

Get ready - it’s rough out there. My beautiful Ivy grad daughter is dating a drop out server. Great guy - I’ve grown to be happy for her because at least he’s kind and thoughtful and not a weirdo or ahole. He supports himself, has a car and apt (with roommates). She’s young - who knows where life will go. But many of her friends are in similar situations. Another friend’s Law school daughter is dating an Uber driver. Ivys have high percentages of gay men so that adds to the shortages.

I think young women are going to have to temper their expectations if they want to get married. There just aren't enough high achieving men out there compared to women. It's kind of sad, really.

DP. Is it, though? As I posted earlier, most men certainly didn’t worry about finding a high-achieving woman back when they vastly outnumbered women in colleges.

Men tend to not care about women's achievements. They mostly care about whether she likes sex, puts out often and won't nag him.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It is also the Divorce rate causing problems and unwed mothers. Boys have very few role models.

I hired a "kid" he is 36. He is operating at the level of a 23 year male of 1995 and a 15 years old male of 1955.

How is this possible? My uncles literally fought in WWII at 18. They came back from war and literally married HS sweethearts, started their career. By 36 my young flew 40 missions in WWII, was married 14 years, had four kids, house in suburbs, and was a NYC Detective which required a college degree and a test which he got at night while working, having kids, passing detective test and doing all his own home repairs, mowing lawn etc.

I did not go WWII but I went to college (lived at home) worked 20 hours a week during college, graduated. And by 24 I had a department I was running at a big bank with staff. I then got my MBA at night and graduated by 29. Since I worked during college in banking by 29 I had 11 years work experience, a MBA, got promotions, seriously dating a girl I planed to marry and owned a Condo.

The boys today are losers. I have a guy at work who literally has an IVY league degree but go divorced as Mom left him, kids have been a side issue he never addressed. His son is in community college and wants to fix cars. The other lady at work, had fertility issues, babied the one child she had a son, he dropped out of HS!!! She is an executive.

No one is taking the belt to these boys. A strong Dad and a married couple should be beating the sons literally into shape.

Pops, I think you took a wrong turn somewhere on the internet.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It is also the Divorce rate causing problems and unwed mothers. Boys have very few role models.

I hired a "kid" he is 36. He is operating at the level of a 23 year male of 1995 and a 15 years old male of 1955.

How is this possible? My uncles literally fought in WWII at 18. They came back from war and literally married HS sweethearts, started their career. By 36 my young flew 40 missions in WWII, was married 14 years, had four kids, house in suburbs, and was a NYC Detective which required a college degree and a test which he got at night while working, having kids, passing detective test and doing all his own home repairs, mowing lawn etc.

I did not go WWII but I went to college (lived at home) worked 20 hours a week during college, graduated. And by 24 I had a department I was running at a big bank with staff. I then got my MBA at night and graduated by 29. Since I worked during college in banking by 29 I had 11 years work experience, a MBA, got promotions, seriously dating a girl I planed to marry and owned a Condo.

The boys today are losers. I have a guy at work who literally has an IVY league degree but go divorced as Mom left him, kids have been a side issue he never addressed. His son is in community college and wants to fix cars. The other lady at work, had fertility issues, babied the one child she had a son, he dropped out of HS!!! She is an executive.

No one is taking the belt to these boys. A strong Dad and a married couple should be beating the sons literally into shape.

Low income families have higher rates of physical punishment yet that doesn’t seem to be working to get their kids into college. I’m a single mom, never married, and my DS has turned out great without me having to take the belt to him. He’s in grad school now. No father around, just me. I teach students who have two MIA parents. You only really need one functioning adult in your life.

[Anonymous]

My son says he wants to drop out of college and become an influencer. I said, “Uh no, you’re going to finish your civil engineering degree.”

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Still waiting for people to talk about how teaching has changed to be more advantageous to girls.

Some of it is biological according to NYT article about this - boys mature later than girls do, yet the academic expectations of the younger grades has increased over time as have testing standards which affect how classroom time is utilized (prep to test bc experiential).

Recess used to be 60-90 min daily, unstructured. That was early to mid 20th century. Yet weekly recess time has decreased by sixty minutes since just 2001.

So first you're saying that the focus on girls activities and programs meant for girls has caused the downfall of boys, but now you're saying it's just lack of recess? Make up your minds.

I never said any of that. You realize there are a lot of posters here, right? I’m answering the question.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My son says he wants to drop out of college and become an influencer. I said, “Uh no, you’re going to finish your civil engineering degree.”

+1 he can be an influencer after he gets his degree. You can't be in influencer for the rest of your life. Eventually, you will be a nobody. Then what?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Who will our daughters marry then?

No worries, and I say this with all seriousness. Alot of successful, educated women marry “down”. Lots of senior level women at my corporate job have low-achieving husbands, househusbands, SAHD husbands etc. That seems to be the norm among that cohort UNLESS they don’t have kids. In that case, the husband may or may not have a good career like the wife. I can also think of a couple high achieving exec women at work who are single, either via divorce or never married.

Get ready - it’s rough out there. My beautiful Ivy grad daughter is dating a drop out server. Great guy - I’ve grown to be happy for her because at least he’s kind and thoughtful and not a weirdo or ahole. He supports himself, has a car and apt (with roommates). She’s young - who knows where life will go. But many of her friends are in similar situations. Another friend’s Law school daughter is dating an Uber driver. Ivys have high percentages of gay men so that adds to the shortages.

Were the straight men at your daughter’s Ivy in demand? Asking out of pure selfishness, as I hope my DS will find a good match in college.

[Anonymous]

This thread is depressing but also not that relatable as a parent of a son. In my son's HS peer group (private SF Bay), the majority of the guys he hangs with are funny, deep, motivated and college-bound. I don't think he has a single friend who isn't talking about college as the next goal. He has noted many girls in his school peer group appear to be more intense and organized than his guy friends - who cultivate a more laid back, chill vibe - but they both go to great colleges in extremely high numbers. Almost 100%.

So for all the parents of girls who say there aren't any motivated or ambitious males for your daughters to date, don't despair. There are lots of gems in my son's school!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This thread is depressing but also not that relatable as a parent of a son. In my son's HS peer group (private SF Bay), the majority of the guys he hangs with are funny, deep, motivated and college-bound. I don't think he has a single friend who isn't talking about college as the next goal. He has noted many girls in his school peer group appear to be more intense and organized than his guy friends - who cultivate a more laid back, chill vibe - but they both go to great colleges in extremely high numbers. Almost 100%.

So for all the parents of girls who say there aren't any motivated or ambitious males for your daughters to date, don't despair. There are lots of gems in my son's school!

Unfortunately, in total, there aren't as many men going to college compared to women. Hence the thread.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Who will our daughters marry then?

No worries, and I say this with all seriousness. Alot of successful, educated women marry “down”. Lots of senior level women at my corporate job have low-achieving husbands, househusbands, SAHD husbands etc. That seems to be the norm among that cohort UNLESS they don’t have kids. In that case, the husband may or may not have a good career like the wife. I can also think of a couple high achieving exec women at work who are single, either via divorce or never married.

Get ready - it’s rough out there. My beautiful Ivy grad daughter is dating a drop out server. Great guy - I’ve grown to be happy for her because at least he’s kind and thoughtful and not a weirdo or ahole. He supports himself, has a car and apt (with roommates). She’s young - who knows where life will go. But many of her friends are in similar situations. Another friend’s Law school daughter is dating an Uber driver. Ivys have high percentages of gay men so that adds to the shortages.

This is also the situation at many LACs.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Who will our daughters marry then?

No worries, and I say this with all seriousness. Alot of successful, educated women marry “down”. Lots of senior level women at my corporate job have low-achieving husbands, househusbands, SAHD husbands etc. That seems to be the norm among that cohort UNLESS they don’t have kids. In that case, the husband may or may not have a good career like the wife. I can also think of a couple high achieving exec women at work who are single, either via divorce or never married.

Get ready - it’s rough out there. My beautiful Ivy grad daughter is dating a drop out server. Great guy - I’ve grown to be happy for her because at least he’s kind and thoughtful and not a weirdo or ahole. He supports himself, has a car and apt (with roommates). She’s young - who knows where life will go. But many of her friends are in similar situations. Another friend’s Law school daughter is dating an Uber driver. Ivys have high percentages of gay men so that adds to the shortages.

So my straight, good looking Ivy sons should have a lot of great women to date is what you are saying? It sounds like all of the women will be competing for the same small group of successful men.