What are we supposed to do about non-athletic child?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My 6th grade son who is terrible at every sport and has no interest in the sports his friends play has THRIVED on his no-cut middle school cross country team. He loves being a part of a team, loves the social aspect and gets great exercise. I wish it were year-round.

I’ve found middle school CC to be so sweet. The kids are so supportive of one another, even the slowest runners. I’m sure it has to do with the individuality. While they pool scores for the “team” awards, the fastest kids are still recognized individually for their accomplishments. There isn’t the negativity for the poorer performing kids like there is with team sports

[Anonymous]

Bowling league

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Non team sports or swim team. Another possibility is something less competitive like whatever the equivalent of Girls on the Run for boys.

They don’t have programs like girls on the run for boys. Boys don’t have needs.

You're looking for Let Me Run, which is a running and wellness program for boys very similar to Girls On The Run. https://www.letmerun.org/

[Anonymous]

Your kid’s coaches suck. My DH coaches 4th graders of varying ability and makes sure everyone gets playing time and emphasizes they win or lose as a team. There is no one player responsible for how they perform. Any grown man using profanity toward a child in a rec sport is a loser trying to live vicariously through their child’s sports team.

But also agree with trying non team sports. Get creative, there are things like rock climbing classes that would be good for physical activity. Bike riding (do you live near any trails?).

[Anonymous]

Hi OP, I have uncoordinated kids as well but also encourage physical activity. I'm sorry that coach was an ahole. My oldest was a daisy picker but enjoyed the team aspect of her rec soccer team through fourth grade. Her coach and teammates were so accepting. Fifth grade moved to co-ed and that was a bust, but maybe co-ed rec leagues could be good for your son, if you figure an uncoordinated boy is at least more athletic than an uncoordinated girl.

I think in elem they can still get enough physical activity through regular play and family time (hikes, walks, bike rides, park, pool, summer camp). Keep going with the lessons for those lifetime sports that dc has any interest in (golf, tennis, swimming, etc.)

In middle school, we found NICA mountain biking. If that sounds interesting, see if you have a team in your area - it is a nationwide league. My daughter had never tried it before (but liked bike riding), and the usual suggestions (running, swimming) seemed too grueling. It's been amazing for her. It is very inclusive and welcoming and positive. It is also fun - she is cautious by nature but has found herself in thrilling situations inadvertently and is so proud she can do it. Her first race her goal was to finish; her second race her goal was not to be last; then she had the goal of moving to the slow group (before then she was one on one with a coach). By the end of the season, she could hold her own. My youngest has very mild cerebral palsy and he can't wait to join.

A lot of the kids on the bike team doing climbing as their indoor sport, but we do not require a winter sport, and she likes a lot of downtime, so we are fine with it, since she does not use screens.

[Anonymous]

I need help with this too

[Anonymous]

I hope you said something to these coaches. They should not be treating children like this.

[Anonymous]

badminton? table tennis or volleyball?

[Anonymous]

Pickleball at Chuck E. Cheese

[Anonymous]

Do you want them to get into sports for college admissions or for their health/exercise? My kids got merit scholarships for college with zero sports ECs. They were in Robotics, Debate, Band, Chess, Hackathons, Volunteer work, Math and Science competitions etc. They have benefited as adults from being in shape.

Here are the sports that they have been doing in school and they continue to do it even as adults. More as a life skill and exercise.

Golf
Swimming
Basketball
Track, jogging
Biking
Yoga and Pilates
Weight training
Exercise in Gym
Indoor rock climbing

[Anonymous]

Rock climb

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Swim team. They divide by skill.

DP: No. We tried that. It got to the point where my kid was too old for slow lanes and then eventually in a lane to himself, which got parents complaining about him even more than they were when he was "holding up the lane."

OP, I suggest low key individual sports for exercise, like hiking, rock climbing, cycling, running, etc. Stay away from toxic coaching - -it kills a kids self esteem. Also remember sports are not the only rewarding activity that builds team work: orchestra or band, theater, robotics teams, etc. There are many options.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I hope you said something to these coaches. They should not be treating children like this.

The problem is that most coaches were decent or good athletes themselves and have zero training or understanding about kids with different abilities. They think a slower kid isn't trying. Too many of these coaches are simply clueless.

[Anonymous]

If there's a sport team your son really loves but isn't good at, you can likely do 1:1 lessons, like ball handling skills for soccer. Hopefully that would be enough to help him hold his own.

We have a middle schooler who loves sports (follows football and baseball obsessively), but isn't particularly gifted...so we focus on one team sport, soccer, where he plays goalie (and he is finally good at it!).

Aside from soccer, he has a lot of endurance, so he does swim team and a lot of cycling with his dad. He also has taken snowboard lessons on 1-2 ski trips every winter. He does sailing camp in the summer (we live near Annapolis). Snowboarding, skiiing, cycling and sailing are all great nonteam sports you can do as an adult with friends and also stay fit. I was very nonathletic as a kid and my parents were the same...I'm very glad my DH has worked with my son to find athletic activities he can do well at and enjoy.

[Anonymous]

My kid hated sports and didn't have the coordination. You know what he loves: debate and his farming classes/club. Let him be. He'll find something he likes.