Anyone transition from big pay/big house/big expense to a low cost, simple, yet fulfilling retirement life?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I wish the people in their 60s and 70s in my neighborhood would downsize so that we could buy one of their big houses. We bought a small house 10 years ago in a lovely neighborhood. Now with a preschooler, an elementary schooler, and both parents WFH we would love more room, but no one is selling. I don't know why the elderly want their 4000 sq. foot houses now that their kids are long gone, but that it seems they don't want to leave them.

probably because moving in a PITA, they have a low mortgage rate, and the new townhomes are almost as expensive as the 4000sf houses.
Unless you are planning on moving south to retire, it's easier just to keep your current home

And then when they die, get dementia or are otherwise incapacitated, they can leave the cleaning out the big house and moving for their kids to deal with. Very considerate.

DP.. I pushed our ILs to downsize a long time ago, and they refused. Then my FIL got dementia, and moving would've been difficult for them. Then he died, and my MIL got decision paralysis, even though she knew she had to move. Then she fell for the third time, blacked out, and finally made the move to a smaller place.

My parents moved when we all moved out. But, moving out and downsizing is no small feat for people who have lived in their homes for 40 years.

Personally, I cannot wait to downsize, but my problem right now is where do I move to? And a PP is correct. Prices have gone up so much that a nice but smaller condo in a nice area is almost the same price as my large sfh in a good school district. It's hard to move in that case.

There is no such thing as a good school district. It’s code for wealthy and white. Why leave your home? It should be paid off.

You forgot Asian and South Asian. Anyway, of course there are good school districts. You may disagree based on your own internal metrics but it's pointless to claim that most people do not believe and accept the concept of good school districts. After all, it is a major role in real estate buying decisions for many people and those districts are backed up by excellent scores, low behavioral problems, etc. Things that add up to "good school district." Wishing it wasn't so isn't going to make it go away.

Not shocking---"good school districts" are in areas of wealth. It's much easier to educate kids who have a good start and have involved parents at home.

So? They are still good school districts. That's why they're called *good* school districts because they do an excellent job educating kids in sane and safe environments with high standards. Buyers know exactly what they are getting and why they're paying a premium for housing to get away from disorder and low standards.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It is selfish of elderly people not to get their housing and other affairs in order while they still have the physical and mental faculties to do so, rather than dumping it on their children (many of whom are working and raising their own kids).

The boomers did the same for their parents and I imagine I will do the same for my parents too. It's not selfish. If anything it's often faster and easier to deal with housing and clearing out the house after they have passed away than during their life. It would take my mother a year to declutter, I could do it in one week.

My parents did the calculations and realized it was cheaper/easier to stay in their large family house than downsize. The only benefit to downsizing would be for a place that was on one floor, but ranch houses are rare where they live and those that exist are often even more expensive. Add to that the costs of buying and selling, which adds up significantly. Their taxes are also much lower due to the Maryland homstead tax credit, which they'd lose if they sold and would then have to pay much higher property taxes at the new purchase price. If would only make sense to sell if they were moving directly to a retirement/assisted living community but they haven't hit that point yet, and may never. So few of their friends have downsized or are planning to downsize, all for this reason. People stay in their houses until they (if they do it) move to a retirement community. Doing something in between is rare for the aforementioned reasons.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Before we retired we sold our single family home in the city and bought 2 condos, one at the beach and one in the city. Makes it very easy to close the door and walk away. HOA takes care of everything, packages, gardens, pool, security, maintenance.

Our life is so streamlined now, we don't really need a car as we can walk everywhere. One of our kids returned after college and we have plenty of room. We may just lend them $ to purchase something, we made plenty of money sending our house and downsizing.

if you don’t need a car how do you get between your two homes?

We fly between homes. When we land we take the metro or Uber to get to our places. Both places are in walkable and bike-able locations with great public transportation.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I wish the people in their 60s and 70s in my neighborhood would downsize so that we could buy one of their big houses. We bought a small house 10 years ago in a lovely neighborhood. Now with a preschooler, an elementary schooler, and both parents WFH we would love more room, but no one is selling. I don't know why the elderly want their 4000 sq. foot houses now that their kids are long gone, but that it seems they don't want to leave them.

probably because moving in a PITA, they have a low mortgage rate, and the new townhomes are almost as expensive as the 4000sf houses.
Unless you are planning on moving south to retire, it's easier just to keep your current home

And then when they die, get dementia or are otherwise incapacitated, they can leave the cleaning out the big house and moving for their kids to deal with. Very considerate.

DP.. I pushed our ILs to downsize a long time ago, and they refused. Then my FIL got dementia, and moving would've been difficult for them. Then he died, and my MIL got decision paralysis, even though she knew she had to move. Then she fell for the third time, blacked out, and finally made the move to a smaller place.

My parents moved when we all moved out. But, moving out and downsizing is no small feat for people who have lived in their homes for 40 years.

Personally, I cannot wait to downsize, but my problem right now is where do I move to? And a PP is correct. Prices have gone up so much that a nice but smaller condo in a nice area is almost the same price as my large sfh in a good school district. It's hard to move in that case.

There is no such thing as a good school district. It’s code for wealthy and white. Why leave your home? It should be paid off.

You forgot Asian and South Asian. Anyway, of course there are good school districts. You may disagree based on your own internal metrics but it's pointless to claim that most people do not believe and accept the concept of good school districts. After all, it is a major role in real estate buying decisions for many people and those districts are backed up by excellent scores, low behavioral problems, etc. Things that add up to "good school district." Wishing it wasn't so isn't going to make it go away.

Not shocking---"good school districts" are in areas of wealth. It's much easier to educate kids who have a good start and have involved parents at home.

So? They are still good school districts. That's why they're called *good* school districts because they do an excellent job educating kids in sane and safe environments with high standards. Buyers know exactly what they are getting and why they're paying a premium for housing to get away from disorder and low standards.

The so called "good" schools have their own issues and violence now. And, often the parents aren't involved, they jus thave higher expectations. We don't have school districts, we have schools in counties.

[Anonymous]

My mom is in her 80's. Her house has been paid off for many years. Why would she sell and if she does someone will just tear it down (not really fixable)? Its her home. She bought i 50+ years ago. Selling would cost a lot of money.

[Anonymous]

We are in our late 50s. We plan to downsize in the DMV area. Our home is over 7000sqft worth over $2m paid off so we should be able to get a smaller place (one level living) and put some $$ in pocket, reduce ongoing expenses such as RE taxes, utilities, maintenance etc. Finances aside, it will be liberating. We take care of our elderly parents now (both living in large homes) and wish they had proactively downsized when the were in better health. Neither wants to downsize now and this has made life much more stressful. Yes…we are struggling to maintain both sets of parents homes. Very selfish…we don’t want to do the same to our kids. One must think of others.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Before we retired we sold our single family home in the city and bought 2 condos, one at the beach and one in the city. Makes it very easy to close the door and walk away. HOA takes care of everything, packages, gardens, pool, security, maintenance.

Our life is so streamlined now, we don't really need a car as we can walk everywhere. One of our kids returned after college and we have plenty of room. We may just lend them $ to purchase something, we made plenty of money sending our house and downsizing.

Condos are not a good investment. Waste of money.

I agree condos do not appreciate in value and are not good investments, but the question was how have you streamlined your life; not how to invest your money.

My husband and I are in our early 60's, we made a LOT of money when we sold our single family property. I hated living in a multi-level home that I had to drive to everything and take care of the yard and maintain the home. I was done raising the kids, done with suburban life. My kids like living in urban areas, although they like the house they grew up in, I could see they might never live there. We seriously streamlined out lives by getting rid of the house.

I wanted to cash in on the house, we practically tripled what we bought it for, I didn't want my money sitting in a house I didn't want to live in. We wanted a condo at the beach and one in the city. Shockingly the condos have both increased in value (as has the HOA).

If I was in my early 30's I wouldn't suggest purchasing a condo if you need to make money through home ownership. For certain people its fine.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Before we retired we sold our single family home in the city and bought 2 condos, one at the beach and one in the city. Makes it very easy to close the door and walk away. HOA takes care of everything, packages, gardens, pool, security, maintenance.

Our life is so streamlined now, we don't really need a car as we can walk everywhere. One of our kids returned after college and we have plenty of room. We may just lend them $ to purchase something, we made plenty of money sending our house and downsizing.

Do you like condo living? This sounds appealing on many ways but I’m leery of condos - the condo board politics, close quarters with neighbors, noise issues from other units…I know it might all be fine but I wonder if there would be aggravation.

Where are your condos - DC and OC - or a different beach?

I had a beach condo for awhile and loved so many things about it. But some point the Board changed the bylaws and revised the payment system for major maintenance resulting in a large special assessment (>$50,000) for certain sections. Before doing this, the Bard had all of the major maintenance done on sections that benefited them. And there is a certain section where there are structural issues that the Board isn’t making decisions to move forward to ameliorate those structural issues which makes it impossible to sell. This experience makes me wary of condos.

I love my condos they are both about 1,300 sf with balconies, pools and other amenities. Condos are a tricky purchase, we just lucked out that we are on the end in both condos and only have one adjoining wall. The building is concrete so you can't hear anything. Only recently we can smell pot every once in awhile in one building. Our HOA is very expensive in one building so people who live here are very concerned with the upkeep and condition of the building and are a bit aloof, but that doesn't bother me. The special assessments can be pricey on an older buildings but I was always spending money on my house (new roof, windows, water heater- always something). I also don't have to use the elevator in either of my condos so I don't really have to interact with my neighbors to much, similar to when I lived in a house.
I'm on an east coast city and Miami Beach.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Before we retired we sold our single family home in the city and bought 2 condos, one at the beach and one in the city. Makes it very easy to close the door and walk away. HOA takes care of everything, packages, gardens, pool, security, maintenance.

Our life is so streamlined now, we don't really need a car as we can walk everywhere. One of our kids returned after college and we have plenty of room. We may just lend them $ to purchase something, we made plenty of money sending our house and downsizing.

Condos are not a good investment. Waste of money.

I agree condos do not appreciate in value and are not good investments, but the question was how have you streamlined your life; not how to invest your money.

My husband and I are in our early 60's, we made a LOT of money when we sold our single family property. I hated living in a multi-level home that I had to drive to everything and take care of the yard and maintain the home. I was done raising the kids, done with suburban life. My kids like living in urban areas, although they like the house they grew up in, I could see they might never live there. We seriously streamlined out lives by getting rid of the house.

I wanted to cash in on the house, we practically tripled what we bought it for, I didn't want my money sitting in a house I didn't want to live in. We wanted a condo at the beach and one in the city. Shockingly the condos have both increased in value (as has the HOA).

If I was in my early 30's I wouldn't suggest purchasing a condo if you need to make money through home ownership. For certain people its fine.

This. Downsizing not always about $$. It’s about simplifying your life and shedding things you no longer value as much. In older years, less is more.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Before we retired we sold our single family home in the city and bought 2 condos, one at the beach and one in the city. Makes it very easy to close the door and walk away. HOA takes care of everything, packages, gardens, pool, security, maintenance.

Our life is so streamlined now, we don't really need a car as we can walk everywhere. One of our kids returned after college and we have plenty of room. We may just lend them $ to purchase something, we made plenty of money sending our house and downsizing.

Condos are not a good investment. Waste of money.

The right ones are not.

We are in a large city (not scum) and to live downtown it's condo living. We love it. The HOA fees are not that bad when you consider it includes 95% of our home insurance (we only insure our belongings the rest is under the HOA), no exterior maintenance, our gas and hot water are included, wifi also, 24 hour concierge, several public spaces to use or reserve for use for free, never have to shovel snow again, now a lawn, trim shrubs, etc

Ours holds its value and has gone up considerably, because it's in one of the top 3 luxury bldgs in the city. Walking distance to most everything .

When we moved I calculated what I used to pay for all of that and it's not that much more for the HOA fees. And a 24 hour concierge and maintenance on staff are amazing. Our maintenance guy often fixes things for us at no charge so I don't have to call a plumber/etc

Yes, 1,000%
Our electricity, A/C and heating is included in our HOA
The gardeners do our landscaping all year around in our private gardens and on snowy days like today our maintenance crew are plowing the sidewalks! No more shoveling!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I wish the people in their 60s and 70s in my neighborhood would downsize so that we could buy one of their big houses. We bought a small house 10 years ago in a lovely neighborhood. Now with a preschooler, an elementary schooler, and both parents WFH we would love more room, but no one is selling. I don't know why the elderly want their 4000 sq. foot houses now that their kids are long gone, but that it seems they don't want to leave them.

probably because moving in a PITA, they have a low mortgage rate, and the new townhomes are almost as expensive as the 4000sf houses.
Unless you are planning on moving south to retire, it's easier just to keep your current home

And then when they die, get dementia or are otherwise incapacitated, they can leave the cleaning out the big house and moving for their kids to deal with. Very considerate.

DP.. I pushed our ILs to downsize a long time ago, and they refused. Then my FIL got dementia, and moving would've been difficult for them. Then he died, and my MIL got decision paralysis, even though she knew she had to move. Then she fell for the third time, blacked out, and finally made the move to a smaller place.

My parents moved when we all moved out. But, moving out and downsizing is no small feat for people who have lived in their homes for 40 years.

Personally, I cannot wait to downsize, but my problem right now is where do I move to? And a PP is correct. Prices have gone up so much that a nice but smaller condo in a nice area is almost the same price as my large sfh in a good school district. It's hard to move in that case.

There is no such thing as a good school district. It’s code for wealthy and white. Why leave your home? It should be paid off.

You forgot Asian and South Asian. Anyway, of course there are good school districts. You may disagree based on your own internal metrics but it's pointless to claim that most people do not believe and accept the concept of good school districts. After all, it is a major role in real estate buying decisions for many people and those districts are backed up by excellent scores, low behavioral problems, etc. Things that add up to "good school district." Wishing it wasn't so isn't going to make it go away.

Not shocking---"good school districts" are in areas of wealth. It's much easier to educate kids who have a good start and have involved parents at home.

So? They are still good school districts. That's why they're called *good* school districts because they do an excellent job educating kids in sane and safe environments with high standards. Buyers know exactly what they are getting and why they're paying a premium for housing to get away from disorder and low standards.

The so called "good" schools have their own issues and violence now. And, often the parents aren't involved, they jus thave higher expectations. We don't have school districts, we have schools in counties.

Around the DMV you definitely have sought after pyramids. And you admitted parents have higher expectations. When you go to a school dominated by kids from families with higher expectations, it creates a very different environment than a school where expectations are nonexistent. Been there, done that, you aren't convincing anyone.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Love all these posters who think late 50s is ancient and they can’t imagine hosting family at that age.

Now I’ll see if I can drag my 57 year old bones up the stairs. After my glass of warm milk, of course.

lol. I have been thinking the same thing this whole thread. DH and I are 64 and 52, and still working, with a HS-aged child.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Before we retired we sold our single family home in the city and bought 2 condos, one at the beach and one in the city. Makes it very easy to close the door and walk away. HOA takes care of everything, packages, gardens, pool, security, maintenance.

Our life is so streamlined now, we don't really need a car as we can walk everywhere. One of our kids returned after college and we have plenty of room. We may just lend them $ to purchase something, we made plenty of money sending our house and downsizing.

if you don’t need a car how do you get between your two homes?

We fly between homes. When we land we take the metro or Uber to get to our places. Both places are in walkable and bike-able locations with great public transportation.

Do you mind sharing the beach town you moved to, or general area? My son is about to graduate high school and I’m considering something like that.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Before we retired we sold our single family home in the city and bought 2 condos, one at the beach and one in the city. Makes it very easy to close the door and walk away. HOA takes care of everything, packages, gardens, pool, security, maintenance.

Our life is so streamlined now, we don't really need a car as we can walk everywhere. One of our kids returned after college and we have plenty of room. We may just lend them $ to purchase something, we made plenty of money sending our house and downsizing.

if you don’t need a car how do you get between your two homes?

We fly between homes. When we land we take the metro or Uber to get to our places. Both places are in walkable and bike-able locations with great public transportation.

Do you mind sharing the beach town you moved to, or general area? My son is about to graduate high school and I’m considering something like that.

Nvm, I see you said Miami Beach, thx!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I wish the people in their 60s and 70s in my neighborhood would downsize so that we could buy one of their big houses. We bought a small house 10 years ago in a lovely neighborhood. Now with a preschooler, an elementary schooler, and both parents WFH we would love more room, but no one is selling. I don't know why the elderly want their 4000 sq. foot houses now that their kids are long gone, but that it seems they don't want to leave them.

probably because moving in a PITA, they have a low mortgage rate, and the new townhomes are almost as expensive as the 4000sf houses.
Unless you are planning on moving south to retire, it's easier just to keep your current home

And then when they die, get dementia or are otherwise incapacitated, they can leave the cleaning out the big house and moving for their kids to deal with. Very considerate.

oh cry me a river. My DH grandma did just this with the her house in NY and when all was said and done 3M was split tax free just from the sale of said house. Hardly a burden🙄