RTO and No Childcare.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Most of the women in my company who tried to WFH and watch their preschoolers themselves in order to save on childcare were fired or forced to quit. Those of us who raised our children before the pandemic did not have it any easier than you all do. Wages have risen in our area commensurate with costs of housing, etc. Give me a break. You all had it easier than we did for a time, but now recess is over.

Not sure where you live, but wages haven't come close to keeping up with housing costs in the DMV. Child care costs have also skyrocketed compared to wages.

I do believe this. I could not have afforded FT childcare and to work FT if I had to do it today (at my equivalent salary when I had my kid).

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I just hope that maybe RTO will mean public schools abandon the "let's celebrate everyone's holidays with a day off" calendar that keeps kids out of school for half of September and October. I'm convinced it's crap like this that's the reason Harris lost.

I think all three of these are completely unrelated in reality.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Our kid has been working from home since well before Covid. When she and her husband decided to have kids they lined up child care first - the grandparents when the kids were babies and a preschool/daycare once they were toddlers. It never occurred to her for a second that she could watch her kids at home herself and work at the same time. It’s not fair to anyone involved.

Time to return to reality, ladies.

Grandparents. Heh. That's not the kind of childcare most are talking about. I think you're the one not living in the real world.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It’s not a lack of childcare that’s the problem; it’s that these women want to have it both ways. They don’t want to pay anyone else to watch their children, they prefer to fleece their employers.

Yeah, that’s not it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Are a lot of women employed FT in professional careers really saying they have no childcare? That's not what I've seen on DCUM. People are often talking about the extra time for commuting and difference of being out of the house. So like a 10yp may come home from school and not have childcare from 4-5pm because they can entertain themselves while parent works. But the parent may not want them actually alone in the house. It's a childcare gap. Same with the mornings before school opens - I would need beforecare to RTO and it might not be available this school year (already full). Or preschool may close at 5pm but with commute I'd get home later than that, etc.

WFH necessitates childcare if you have a real job but can be for fewer hours, or you cover the occasional days off and breaks without always taking PTO etc

OP here - I consider a childcare gap a lack of childcare. Before or after school care programs are not going to quickly sprout up.

DP but my private sector DH has been fully remote for over a decade now and I (a fed) was hybrid well before COVID (am fully at home now). We’ve passed up career opportunities to keep this arrangement because we like having a parent home to get the kids off the bus and to extracurriculars that begin around 4:30/5 (one is in a travel sport with a lot of practices). We can set our own hours so one starts early and one starts late. We built our lives around prioritizing flexibility over constantly going for more $ so I don’t consider this a childcare shortage.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:why RTO is Govt issue? People should do it in the same way they used to before COVID. Some people have got too comfortable and assume some of the covid time perks as permanent.

+100

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Our kid has been working from home since well before Covid. When she and her husband decided to have kids they lined up child care first - the grandparents when the kids were babies and a preschool/daycare once they were toddlers. It never occurred to her for a second that she could watch her kids at home herself and work at the same time. It’s not fair to anyone involved.

Time to return to reality, ladies.

Ugh this is such sexist garbage. As PPs have explained the issue isn’t people trying to WAH with a toddler. It’s tacking on the commuting hours to the workday which = needing even more childcare (this is essentially a sudden pay cut — after care for 2 kids can be $700+ per month).

Also my DH works in private sector IT. He and many other *men* (and women) in his field are fully remote. My DH has enjoyed the work/life balance and being home to coach the kids sports after school, he helps cook dinner, etc.

So it’s not just “ladies” who care about being around for their kids. Sorry your daughter couldn’t find a better father for her kids if you think this way.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The issue for me is the 8-6 in office requirement. Right now, I work 8-5, pick up my kids, and then work a few more hours at home in the evening. Daycare closes at 6 and I have a 45 minute commute, so I'm not sure what I will go if the 8-6 requirement goes into effect.

Right. I think that is what the childcare threads are talking about. It’s not lack of childcare it’s the commutes along with the 8-6pm requirement. If before care and aftercare is from 7:30-6 and my commute is an hour it doesn’t work.

It works if there are TWO responsible parents. you stagger your days: DH does drop off and gets home later; DW does pickup and gets home earlier. When my kid was little and in daycare I left for work at 7:45, worked from 830-5, picked him up by 530, home by 6:15. DH dropped him off in the morning, got to the office later, and worked pretty late (maybe until 730 or so most nights).

Later on we got a part-time babysitter for after school so that made it even easier - we would stagger drop off at 8:30 and then the other just needed to be home around 6-630.

DP, but this sounds like a horrible way to live.

DH and I have both teleworked since well before COVID. Kids get off the bus at 4:10 so I work 7:30-4. DH handles mornings with them and then works 9-5ish. We don’t want our kids in childcare until 5:30 at night, that is way too long. How do they have any energy for extracurriculars after that? Or do they just not get to do them?

And one parent getting home at 6:30-7:30? That would never work for us. We are involved in coaching after school sports and days they don’t have sports they can be home to play with neighborhood kids. We don’t want our kids to have to be out of the house 9-10 hours per day for our jobs.

I get some people have no other options, but thankfully DH and I have advanced degrees and good career options. If I had to RTO full time then I’d quit and find something else. Also DH makes enough in the private sector to carry us for a while.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It’s not a lack of childcare that’s the problem; it’s that these women want to have it both ways. They don’t want to pay anyone else to watch their children, they prefer to fleece their employers.

It's not a women's issue. It's a family issue, a topic for men and women to address. In other words, it's a topic that affects every worker who is a parent and therefore the workplace needs to accommodate it somehow or other. If the workplace will not, then society must step up.

Or people should just choose to not have kids. This is a terrible world to bring kids into anyway.

Well we have a birth rate decline and now we want to get rid of immigrants, so society may want to rethink the issue of making the continuation of our species and individualistic endeavor.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The issue for me is the 8-6 in office requirement. Right now, I work 8-5, pick up my kids, and then work a few more hours at home in the evening. Daycare closes at 6 and I have a 45 minute commute, so I'm not sure what I will go if the 8-6 requirement goes into effect.

Right. I think that is what the childcare threads are talking about. It’s not lack of childcare it’s the commutes along with the 8-6pm requirement. If before care and aftercare is from 7:30-6 and my commute is an hour it doesn’t work.

It works if there are TWO responsible parents. you stagger your days: DH does drop off and gets home later; DW does pickup and gets home earlier. When my kid was little and in daycare I left for work at 7:45, worked from 830-5, picked him up by 530, home by 6:15. DH dropped him off in the morning, got to the office later, and worked pretty late (maybe until 730 or so most nights).

Later on we got a part-time babysitter for after school so that made it even easier - we would stagger drop off at 8:30 and then the other just needed to be home around 6-630.

DP, but this sounds like a horrible way to live.

DH and I have both teleworked since well before COVID. Kids get off the bus at 4:10 so I work 7:30-4. DH handles mornings with them and then works 9-5ish. We don’t want our kids in childcare until 5:30 at night, that is way too long. How do they have any energy for extracurriculars after that? Or do they just not get to do them?

And one parent getting home at 6:30-7:30? That would never work for us. We are involved in coaching after school sports and days they don’t have sports they can be home to play with neighborhood kids. We don’t want our kids to have to be out of the house 9-10 hours per day for our jobs.

I get some people have no other options, but thankfully DH and I have advanced degrees and good career options. If I had to RTO full time then I’d quit and find something else. Also DH makes enough in the private sector to carry us for a while.

Yes, I think this can work out in the baby and toddler years for some families, but doesn’t work when kids need to go to activities and get help with homework.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It’s not a lack of childcare that’s the problem; it’s that these women want to have it both ways. They don’t want to pay anyone else to watch their children, they prefer to fleece their employers.

It's not a women's issue. It's a family issue, a topic for men and women to address. In other words, it's a topic that affects every worker who is a parent and therefore the workplace needs to accommodate it somehow or other. If the workplace will not, then society must step up.

Or people should just choose to not have kids. This is a terrible world to bring kids into anyway.

Well we have a birth rate decline and now we want to get rid of immigrants, so society may want to rethink the issue of making the continuation of our species and individualistic endeavor.

And of course it’s Elon who keeps ranting about the birth rate while also making it harder for families to have kids.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Most of the women in my company who tried to WFH and watch their preschoolers themselves in order to save on childcare were fired or forced to quit. Those of us who raised our children before the pandemic did not have it any easier than you all do. Wages have risen in our area commensurate with costs of housing, etc. Give me a break. You all had it easier than we did for a time, but now recess is over.

Well I had to take unpaid leave for my maternity leaves. Wahhh why do people get paid parental leave now? No one should have it better than me! Workplace policies should prioritize the employer always. How dare families want better work/life balance!?

/s

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The issue for me is the 8-6 in office requirement. Right now, I work 8-5, pick up my kids, and then work a few more hours at home in the evening. Daycare closes at 6 and I have a 45 minute commute, so I'm not sure what I will go if the 8-6 requirement goes into effect.

Right. I think that is what the childcare threads are talking about. It’s not lack of childcare it’s the commutes along with the 8-6pm requirement. If before care and aftercare is from 7:30-6 and my commute is an hour it doesn’t work.

It works if there are TWO responsible parents. you stagger your days: DH does drop off and gets home later; DW does pickup and gets home earlier. When my kid was little and in daycare I left for work at 7:45, worked from 830-5, picked him up by 530, home by 6:15. DH dropped him off in the morning, got to the office later, and worked pretty late (maybe until 730 or so most nights).

Later on we got a part-time babysitter for after school so that made it even easier - we would stagger drop off at 8:30 and then the other just needed to be home around 6-630.

DP, but this sounds like a horrible way to live.

DH and I have both teleworked since well before COVID. Kids get off the bus at 4:10 so I work 7:30-4. DH handles mornings with them and then works 9-5ish. We don’t want our kids in childcare until 5:30 at night, that is way too long. How do they have any energy for extracurriculars after that? Or do they just not get to do them?

And one parent getting home at 6:30-7:30? That would never work for us. We are involved in coaching after school sports and days they don’t have sports they can be home to play with neighborhood kids. We don’t want our kids to have to be out of the house 9-10 hours per day for our jobs.

I get some people have no other options, but thankfully DH and I have advanced degrees and good career options. If I had to RTO full time then I’d quit and find something else. Also DH makes enough in the private sector to carry us for a while.

OP here. My elementary kids do very few after school activities. Scouts one night a week, speech therapy one night, and church activities on Wednesday. They get on the bus at 7:10 am. On my non-telework days (3x a week) they get picked up around 6pm. It is not ideal. We luckily live only 30 minute commute - at most - from our jobs. If we have to RTO - it will be 6pm every night.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The issue for me is the 8-6 in office requirement. Right now, I work 8-5, pick up my kids, and then work a few more hours at home in the evening. Daycare closes at 6 and I have a 45 minute commute, so I'm not sure what I will go if the 8-6 requirement goes into effect.

Right. I think that is what the childcare threads are talking about. It’s not lack of childcare it’s the commutes along with the 8-6pm requirement. If before care and aftercare is from 7:30-6 and my commute is an hour it doesn’t work.

It works if there are TWO responsible parents. you stagger your days: DH does drop off and gets home later; DW does pickup and gets home earlier. When my kid was little and in daycare I left for work at 7:45, worked from 830-5, picked him up by 530, home by 6:15. DH dropped him off in the morning, got to the office later, and worked pretty late (maybe until 730 or so most nights).

Later on we got a part-time babysitter for after school so that made it even easier - we would stagger drop off at 8:30 and then the other just needed to be home around 6-630.

DP, but this sounds like a horrible way to live.

DH and I have both teleworked since well before COVID. Kids get off the bus at 4:10 so I work 7:30-4. DH handles mornings with them and then works 9-5ish. We don’t want our kids in childcare until 5:30 at night, that is way too long. How do they have any energy for extracurriculars after that? Or do they just not get to do them?

And one parent getting home at 6:30-7:30? That would never work for us. We are involved in coaching after school sports and days they don’t have sports they can be home to play with neighborhood kids. We don’t want our kids to have to be out of the house 9-10 hours per day for our jobs.

I get some people have no other options, but thankfully DH and I have advanced degrees and good career options. If I had to RTO full time then I’d quit and find something else. Also DH makes enough in the private sector to carry us for a while.

This was when my kid was little. it was fine. 4 year olds don’t need extracurriculars. many many families in our school did the same.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Another reason why 1950s America was better.

Nope. I would’ve been shunned as a single mother back then.