Why was I so angry about this?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:DMV Ski dad here. Posting from Utah where we’ve gotten nearly 3 feet of fresh since Saturday.

What is going on with the responses in this thread? You would think OP’s family went swimming with great white sharks without a cage, not skied a groomed blue…

I am assuming the “30 minutes to pull himself together” was a massive exaggeration by OP. If not, the problem is the child, regardless of the fall. Do we know how old the kid is? Given the “skiing for 4 years” comment, I’m assuming at least 8.

I’m with the PP who said strongest skier (usually the dad) brings up the rear, but that’s generally on technical terrain. We skied the extreme terrain in Catherine’s, Supreme Bowl, and the High Traverse yesterday with my DW and 2 elementary schoolers. Given there are plenty of cliffs (they’re marked) and chutes, it’s important to have strong skiers leading (to show the line) and sweeping. There are also tree wells to contend with, a danger not found on groomed runs.

But on a groomed blue, the whole group should be constantly letting different skiers lead, and generally the fastest skier should not be out of sight unless prior agreement has been made to meet at the bottom of the run.

Having someone run into you sucks, but is a part of skiing, and generally unlikely to cause serious injury. Do what you can to ski defensively on crowded runs, but it’s not your DH’s fault.

In our family, everyone leads at different points, and all but the youngest sweep at different points. It sounds like your DH is willing to sweep when you assign him to it. I would just say he needs to sweep all the time unless he specifically asks the group to lead.

Nothing like a "ski dad" posting to namedrop runs but completely dodge the question of responsibility in a family. No one's impressed my guy.

Did you read the post?

“But on a groomed blue, the whole group should be constantly letting different skiers lead, and generally the fastest skier should not be out of sight unless prior agreement has been made to meet at the bottom of the run.

In our family, everyone leads at different points, and all but the youngest sweep at different points. It sounds like your DH is willing to sweep when you assign him to it. I would just say he needs to sweep all the time unless he specifically asks the group to lead.”

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think you should split the days: dad takes Junior in the morning, meet for lunch, mom takes him in the afternoon.

They don't have a fairer schedule because OP's husband doesn't want one. She can put her foot down and deal with his arguments and probably half-assing of it, she can just do it herself, or she can leave. Those are always the options. But "we should split the days better" is not going to magically result in him agreeing.

Or worse, he’ll agree and do a half @$$ job or forget and the kid gets abandoned or injured.

It’s hard in the kids. Having this push and pull with a self centered parent. Society tells them their father is a trusted adult who cares for them, yet their own father ignores them or won’t /can’t connect.

Maybe. But in my experience, the default parent situation occurs when there are two parents present. If OP removes herself from the situation, odds are dad will step up and parent.

And if she leaves, he’ll probably get 50/50 anyway.