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Every job has +s and -s. This one pays you a ton and you have little travel which you don’t like. Idk be grateful use that travel for points so you can take awesome vacations with your family.
My DH makes less than half your salary and travels a lot more. We use all his travel stuff to take great family vacations. He’s looking elsewhere because I told him I would be happy he traveled that much… if he made more money. Kids are busy and have their own lives. My elementary school kids now have neighborhood friends and they miss dad when he’s away but when he’s here they still run off and bike with the neighborhood kids until dinner then homework and bed! You could look for something else but you might get less $, bad work environment, more likely to be laid off, crazy working hours. Again, no job is perfect! Or save like crazy for the next couple years and take a lower paying job! |
holy crap. and bumped by an overly verbose AI. Someone train that AI to be concise. |
| This is not a big deal, OP. |
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OP here. Not sure how this thread was bumped up. I’m at the airport right now heading out for a trip and still feels really hard when I have to leave my kids.
This thread and the responses have been really helpful to remind me to be grateful for what I have. At least 90 percent of the responses told me to stick it out, focus on quality over quantity and manage the money wisely. I even appreciated the responses that were mean-spirited or the ones that told me I’m making a huge mistake and should quit my job. I agree there are pluses and minuses for all situations. Here, I have work travel and it wears me out and gives me a lot of guilt. On the plus side, I get paid very well and my kids are doing well. I agree with the prior poster who said there is no substitute for mom. That’s why I’m home 80 percent of the time every month. I don’t believe making major life decisions based on inchoate fears something going wrong, fleeting feelings, or creating binary all-or-nothing decisions. I’ve instead tried to use logic and reason to try to reach the right decision here, which is to stick this out, invest wisely, and be in a position to help my kids and hopefully grandkids financially. I’m also trying to be vigilant about my health so I can be around for them a long time. I try to remain extremely attuned to my kids development and well being. I try to manage any risk of me not being there 100 percent of the time and have a number of strategies. I pray a lot even though I’m not a religious person. I have created a whole support system for my kids. I’m grateful for what I have and I am trying to multiply my blessings for others. I hope that I look back one day and am proud of these decisions I made. |
| JFC. Grow up, OP. (And this is after reading your most recent update - you sound less whiny, but just as ridiculous.) |
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I get 65K a year and work overtime but don’t get paid for it. 6 days a month away from your family? And you get to work at home the rest of the time? I don’t think you understand how FORTUNATE you are to have the job you do and get paid so so much for it. An insane amount of money. And your dh earns almost as much? You are in the 1%…
So make a decision…be grateful for what you have inside of mopey about what you don’t. Or change the job. But whining on here when many of us aren’t nearly as fortunate…shows your privilege. |
I wrote this before I saw your update. Looks like you did take good steps to reframe your feelings about the job. |
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Your update is good and I think it’s important you finally realize how good you have it. Many people in certain situations who surround themselves with people in similar brackets don’t understand how fortunate they are usually.
My DH makes in lowish 200s and travels way more than you. Fortunatley, he has invite only status to airlines and hotels so we use that for vacations (if he isn’t called back) but it’s hard. He’s finally looking for a different role because it’s not worth it anymore for what he’s being paid. Being away only 6 days a month (!) and making as much as you do is really fortunate. We also realize how lucky and fortunate we are but traveling 50%+ of the time including weekends is no longer sustainable with his salary for us. Originally his company said last year he could come home for weekends but in the last few months changed that policy and he’s had to be away multiple weekends/ weeks and it’s just too much. He just was in 6 countries in 9 days - think of how that impacts someone. This also isn’t rare for him and it’s hard and stressful because then when he comes home exhausted and can’t space out some of the travel. He has a new boss who is chaotic and demanding at all hours too. We are grateful until he can change roles or I get something that pays so much it doesn’t matter. Unfortunately with someone traveling that much, having no family by us, I had to pick a job that was flexible. Good luck to you and your family. Use those days your away to do excellent work and get some “you” time so when you come Home you can be present for your kids. Our kids are still young and it’s hard when DH misses a tournament or something because they are away for work on a weekend. |