Weddings

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:When a same-sex couple gets married, who should pay?

Nobody. They should be sensible, get married at city court and have a pizza party in a pretty park.

I just went to an amazing wedding and reception of two young men that was paid for equally by their parents.

report

01/10/2023 07:02

Subject: Weddings

quote

Anonymous

I’m setting aside an equal amount for my daughter and son. Otherwise, I’m not sure how it would be fair. If my son’s fiancé’s family wants to pay for all of the wedding, I’ll write the couple a check for the amount set aside. Will be very clear to both my children that they are getting equal amounts for their weddings.

report

01/10/2023 12:34

Subject: Weddings

quote

Anonymous

Anonymous wrote:Three of our daughters have gotten married. All three were in their mid 20s or so. We happily paid for the bulk of all three weddings. Each wedding could not have been more different from the other, but each was exactly what the couple wanted and was very, very nice. I’d say the cheapest of the 3 was about $50k and the most expensive was closer to $100k.

We accepted when offered but never requested any help from the grooms’ parents or the couples, and never ever talked to any of them about money. One of the grooms’ parents wanted to spring for the wedding cake, for example, and another wanted to provide the booze - in both cases we said “sure, thank you very much” and that was that. Had they not offered, we wouldn’t have cared or judged.

There’s so much acrimony on DCUM when it comes to family, in laws, kids, who pays for what, etc etc etc. We have never experienced any of that. We’re lucky, I guess.

LOL. Uh, yeah. You are out of touch with the real world.

report

01/10/2023 14:13

Subject: Weddings

quote

Anonymous

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Three of our daughters have gotten married. All three were in their mid 20s or so. We happily paid for the bulk of all three weddings. Each wedding could not have been more different from the other, but each was exactly what the couple wanted and was very, very nice. I’d say the cheapest of the 3 was about $50k and the most expensive was closer to $100k.

We accepted when offered but never requested any help from the grooms’ parents or the couples, and never ever talked to any of them about money. One of the grooms’ parents wanted to spring for the wedding cake, for example, and another wanted to provide the booze - in both cases we said “sure, thank you very much” and that was that. Had they not offered, we wouldn’t have cared or judged.

There’s so much acrimony on DCUM when it comes to family, in laws, kids, who pays for what, etc etc etc. We have never experienced any of that. We’re lucky, I guess.

You've lots of money and willing to spend it on parties so good for you. Not everyone can need or want to.

Well, they weren’t parties they were weddings. A one time thing. So we didn’t mind. We also have pretty sensible kids who didn’t go overboard. They had a pretty good sense for what was reasonable and what wasn’t. We also learned from our mistakes with the first wedding, which was the most expensive. We trimmed the guest list for the other weddings, for example, inviting fewer of our friends who had less of a connection to the couple. After all, weddings are mostly about the couple, their family, and their friends.

In no reality is a 50K to 100K wedding average and sensible.

report

01/10/2023 14:49

Subject: Re:Weddings

quote

Anonymous

My parents gave us $1,000, his parents gave us the same amount. We put in $3,000 of our own money.

So 35 years ago, we had the wedding we could afford with that. It was elegant but not fancy.

report

01/10/2023 15:09

Subject: Weddings

quote

Anonymous

0 for a wedding, 50% of house down payment

report

01/10/2023 15:13

Subject: Weddings

quote

Anonymous

My daughter had 10k saved up, and i matched it.