If you are living your best life right now, are you smug?

[Anonymous]

I feel like the SAHMs and working moms with nannies whom I know are super smug right now, because they are perfectly prepared for this situation and are maybe a tiny bit inconvenienced, but nothing compared to the rest of us parents.

[Anonymous]

I'm definitely not living my best life but I am working and we do have a full time nanny. I'm not smug. I'm fully aware of how fortunate we are that we have this set up. I cannot begin to imagine what other parents are dealing with and I try to be super understanding of my work staff who have childcare challenges. We have set up tools and options to take additional paid leave (small company and we created new paid leave banks not related to the existing PTO) in blocks or intermittently as needed to deal with childcare for the employees that need it (many have SAH spouses but not all).

[Anonymous]

We have an excellent situation, but why would I be smug about it?

DD goes to preschool. DH works from home, but has always done so. I work every other week.

We feel really fortunate.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We have an excellent situation, but why would I be smug about it?

DD goes to preschool. DH works from home, but has always done so. I work every other week.

We feel really fortunate.

This. Our set up was good before covid and we paid for it.

[Anonymous]

I’m a SAHM. I’m more than “a little inconvenienced.” My kids had just started spring swim lessons when Covid hit. We were planning all sorts of summer water activities. That all ended.

That said, I have a newborn and I wasn’t going to travel or go out a lot this summer. In a way it’s kind of nice to have a newborn now and know that I’m not missing out on anything. It’s been really nice to connect as a family during this time. I think it would be really hard to be single right now. The children are a lot of work but they also bring us so much joy and fill the house with laughter.

[Anonymous]

Most SAHPs I know never saw their kids from 8AM - 4PM M-F. Also out of my WOHPs vs SAHPs acquaintances - the SAHPs tended to have way more kids. Usually 3+, one has 6!, versus the WOHPs who usually have 1-3.

So they're in a tailspin as well trying to figure out homeschooling and keeping themselves sane for the 40 hours a week they used to have 'off'.

Grass is not always greener on the other side OP.

[Anonymous]

Maybe examine your lens.

[Anonymous]

This is my normal summer so how is it anything different. Its being a parent. We are very involved so home or school makes no difference to us. Sorry you weren't prepared to actually care for your kids every day but some of us are. Its not smug to just figure out a new plan and make it work.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Most SAHPs I know never saw their kids from 8AM - 4PM M-F. Also out of my WOHPs vs SAHPs acquaintances - the SAHPs tended to have way more kids. Usually 3+, one has 6!, versus the WOHPs who usually have 1-3.

So they're in a tailspin as well trying to figure out homeschooling and keeping themselves sane for the 40 hours a week they used to have 'off'.

Grass is not always greener on the other side OP.

Wow, what in the world?

[Anonymous]

Oh hell no. Pride cometh before the fall. I don’t tempt that stuff.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I feel like the SAHMs and working moms with nannies whom I know are super smug right now, because they are perfectly prepared for this situation and are maybe a tiny bit inconvenienced, but nothing compared to the rest of us parents.

No, I am not smug.

But I am a divorced dad with two teenagers who prefer to be at my place and a new red Jeep so feeling pretty free and happy for the first time in years. And also, I got laid this weekend. It’s all good. But smug? No. What a waste of negative energy.

[Anonymous]

Is this anyone’s best life? I SAH when my kids were little. I occupied my days with trips to the gym, playdates, park, etc. I can’t imagine being trapped at home with young kids and am grateful mine are in middle school. I’m also so thankful that I work now because it keeps me busy. I don’t know how this can be anyone’s best.

[Anonymous]

We are doing okay so far. We are introverts who love WAH, and we have an only child who is old enough to self-entertain for short periods. We can stretch to afford a babysitter/nanny if needed. We have a comfortable house with a pool. Our family members are safe so far, although we worry for them.

I am not smug, I am incredibly grateful. I am also exhausted and stressed even with the many benefits we enjoy. I really feel for those who have less flexible situations.

[Anonymous]

We’ve always had a wonderful full time nanny who is a former teacher and I have always worked from home. DH used to go to the office and had to travel a great deal so it’s been great having him home with no commute. But am I smug? I hope not. I feel very fortunate.

But I will never think this is our best life. It’s horrible what’s happened and I feel scared a lot of the time.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I feel like the SAHMs and working moms with nannies whom I know are super smug right now, because they are perfectly prepared for this situation and are maybe a tiny bit inconvenienced, but nothing compared to the rest of us parents.

SAHM here. With playgrounds, libraries, etc. closed it is not business as usual for me. In fact, my newly three year old gave up her nap a couple of months ago. My 15 month old is a huge climber and a terrible sleeper (despite lots of CIO). We are struggling over here too. So no, not feeling smug at all.